“I missed you,” he growls, lips barely an inch from my own.
“I missed y—” It’s all I manage to get out before his mouth comes crashing down on mine.
8
Put a Little
Love on Me
I didn’t know.
I didn’t know how much I missed this, didn’t know how much I missed Jaxon, until this moment.
His body pressed against mine.
His hands cupping my face, fingers tangled in my hair.
His mouth devouring mine—lips and teeth and tongue lighting me up from the inside. Making me want. Making me need.
Jaxon. Always Jaxon.
I shift against him, desperate to get even closer, and he growls low in his throat. I can feel the tension in his body, can feel the same need in him that is burning deep inside me. But through it all, his hold remains gentle, his fingers stroking my hair instead of pulling, his body cradling mine instead of trying to invade my space.
“Mine.” I whisper the word against his lips and he shudders, wrenching his mouth from my lips.
I whimper, try to pull him back, but he shudders again, buries his face in the bend where my shoulder and neck meet. And then he just breathes—long, slow, deep breaths—like he’s trying to pull my very essence deep inside himself.
I know the feeling.
I slide my hands down to his waist, and as my hands skim over him, I realize he really did lose weight while I was…gone.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper against his ear, but he just shakes his head as he pulls me closer.
“Don’t.” He presses soft kisses along the length of my neck. “Don’t ever apologize to me for what you went through. It’s my fault that I didn’t protect you.”
“It’s nobody’s fault,” I tell him, even as I tilt my head back to give him better access. “It just is what it is.”
Tears suddenly burn my eyes. I blink them away, but Jaxon knows. His hands, already gentle, become downright tender as they stroke my arm, my shoulder, my cheek. “It’s going to be okay, Grace. I promise.”
“It’s already okay.” I swallow down the lump in my throat. “We’re here, aren’t we?”
“Yes.” He presses a kiss to the sensitive spot behind my ear. “Finally.”
My legs go liquid. Heat races through me. My heart trembles in my chest. Jaxon holds me up—of course he does—and murmurs, “I love you,” as he gently scrapes his teeth over my collarbone.
And just like that, everything inside me freezes. My breath, my blood, even the need that’s been burning inside me since he walked into my uncle’s office. All of it…gone. Just like that.
Jaxon must feel it, because he stops immediately. And when he lifts his head, there’s a wary, watchful look in his eyes that makes me feel like I did something wrong. “Grace?” he asks, shifting back a little so that he’s no longer crowding me. “You okay?”
“Yeah, yeah. I’m fine. I just…” I trail off because I don’t know how to answer him, don’t know what to say. Because I want him. I do. I just don’t know how to deal with this weird, uncomfortable feeling that’s building inside me all of a sudden.
“You just…?” Jaxon waits for an answer. Not in an aggressive way but in a concerned way, like he really does just want to make sure I’m all right.
But knowing that only makes the feeling inside me worse, the pressure building until I feel like a rocket about to go off. “I don’t… I want… It feels…” I sound like a jerk fumbling around for an explanation, but then my stomach growls—loudly—and understanding replaces Jaxon’s concern.
“I should have kept my hands to myself until you had something to eat,” he says, taking another couple of steps back. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. I needed to kiss you.” I squeeze his hand, glad to have an explanation for the weird feeling inside me. My mom always said that low blood sugar does strange things, and I can only imagine how low mine is right now, considering I haven’t eaten in nearly four months. “I’ll just grab one of Macy’s granola bars and then go to class. You probably have to head out soon, too, right?”
“Sure,” he says, but I can tell the light has dimmed in his eyes.
I know it’s my fault. I know he’s just being Jaxon and I’m the one who is suddenly acting all weird. But…I don’t know. Everything just feels off with me, and I don’t have a clue how to fix it.
I should probably lean forward so my hair brushes against Jaxon’s hand and he knows everything’s okay. Or at least lean into him for one more hug. But I don’t actually want to do either of those things, so I don’t. Instead, I smile up at him and say, “See you later?”
“Yeah.” He smiles back. “Definitely.”
“Oh, and for some reason, I’ve lost my phone. Meet back here?”
He nods, then gives me another little wave and heads out of my room and down the hallway toward the stairs.
I watch him go, admiring the way he walks, full of purpose and confidence and a come-at-me-at-your-own-risk insouciance that shouldn’t do it for me but somehow totally does. Also, I am completely admiring the hell out of what his very nice ass does for those boring black uniform pants.
Once Jaxon starts to go around the corner, I step back into my room, then kind of pause as he turns to look down the hall at me. He’s got a huge grin on his face now, and it looks good on him. As do the crinkles by the corners of his eyes and the lightness that seems to cover his whole face.
The grin fades just a little as our eyes meet—almost like he’s embarrassed to be caught looking so happy—but it’s too late. I’ve gotten a glimpse at what Jaxon Vega looks like when he’s beaming, and it turns out I like it. I really, really like it.
The anxiety in the pit of my stomach dissolves as easily as it came, and suddenly it’s the easiest thing in the world to blow him the kiss I couldn’t give him earlier. His eyes widen at the gesture and, while he doesn’t do anything as corny as reaching out to grab it, he does wink at me.
I’m laughing as I close my door and head for the shower. How can I not when the Jaxon Vega I get to see is a million times sweeter and more charming than the one the world knows?
But as I turn on the water, a chill works its way through me. Because if it turns out I let Hudson escape, if it turns out I really did bring him back with me, then I’ll be the one responsible for hurting Jaxon and taking away his happiness.