Then I focused on the shifters.
“All right, which of you wants to play first?” I snarled. Even I heard the missing confidence, and I could have sworn the polar bear grinned.
Then he was on me.
I sank my fingers into his thick fur, raking my blade along his dark skin. Crimson poured over my fingers. He knocked me back, throwing my balance, then pressed a heavy shoulder against my chest. The weight was crushing me, my lungs screaming for air. I stabbed at him furiously, coating his fur with blood. But he didn’t budge. When the knife slipped from my grasp, the polar bear went for my throat, sharp teeth tearing into my skin. I gasped for air, struggling away, a growl rolling up my throat. A blast of heat burned beneath my skin right before rippling pressure shoved at my spine.
This time when I reached for my lion, she responded.
I rapid-shifted, throwing the polar bear off of me with a thrust from all four paws. My wings ached at the weight of my lion but I stood, freeing them. Then I launched after the polar bear, who had decided that Akeno and the twins looked like easy prey. How wrong he was. Akeno had his knife ready, and with the help of Tarik and Sebastian, they downed the polar bear in a matter of seconds.
Tarik shot a concerned glance my way and I growled softly. Heat still rolled through my veins, but I was steady. And I could shift.
We had made a mess, though. Four shifters lay dead or near-dead on the dock, and with the guards from the underground already on alert . . .
“We need to move,” Sebastian said, eyes focused the way we had come.
Sure enough, rumbling down the uneven road was another utility van—and even from here I could tell that it was brimming with shifters. I rapid-shifted again, racing behind the others as we hurried for our packs, then ran down the dock. We barely made it onto the trawler deck before the van screeched to a halt. Caspar dropped to a seat in front of the boat controls. He began fidgeting with an unfamiliar panel and unease rippled through me. What if the boat didn’t start? What if he couldn’t drive it?
What if they caught us?
What will Mordecai do to me for this?
The van door flung open. At least ten shifters climbed out, and I had no idea what animals they were.
I could buy them time . . .
I glanced up at Tarik, who flanked my right and watched over the trawler rail. His wings twitched, as if in anticipation of a fight, and I clenched my teeth. He wouldn’t let me go alone. I couldn’t let him risk that.
But then the boat roared to life and we were moving. The shifters behind us scrambled down the dock, some rapid-shifting in an attempt to keep up but faltering when there was a dozen or so feet of water between us.
“Dude! You did it!” One of the twins clapped Caspar on the shoulder.
Sebastian nodded, his eyes still a bit too wide. “Seriously. I’m kinda impressed.”
“It was nothing,” Caspar said, his expression self-satisfied. “Well. Nothing for an absolute tech genius like myself.”
I couldn’t resist smiling, though trepidation still sat heavy in my chest. It couldn’t be this easy. Not escaping the dragons. If we did get away, it wouldn’t be without consequence.
Tarik cleared his throat beside me. “You want to—”
I glanced down at my bare skin and sighed. “I thought I could get some sun.”
Akeno spluttered a laugh that he quickly fought to suppress when Tarik shot him a glare. A warm hand landed on my arm; Nevaeh smirked broadly.
“Fae modesty is so . . . inconvenient, right Reagan?” Her brows lifted conspiratorially before she shot me a wink. “Too bad there’s two of us and we both so enjoy the freedom of nudity.”
Tarik exchanged a look with Akeno that I didn’t quite understand.
I shrugged, studying the goosebumps raising on my arms. “For once, I don’t think I’m going to fight him too hard. I’ll be back.”
Nevaeh offered a sympathetic look and a short nod. I shouldered my pack and waved to the others, still cheering our small victory, and went below deck. The quarters were small, cramped, and smelled of linen and seasalt. There were tiny bunks along the walls, enough for most of us, and a long booth around a small table that someone else could sleep on. With one person on night watch, the arrangement was honestly convenient.
I made my way to the back, to the tiny corner that had been curtained into a bathroom. A miniscule mirror hung on the wall and, for a moment, I paused, trying to recognize the girl who stared back at me. My eyes looked hollow, my blue and black hair limp around my shoulders. Even my skin seemed thin and lackluster. I couldn’t remember the last time I had managed a restful night’s sleep, and exhaustion was evident in every line of my face. It wasn’t for lack of trying, either.
But for once, even music wasn’t keeping the nightmares away. I couldn’t drown out the neverending guilt.
The children. The innocents.
My fault. Their deaths were all my fault.
I could see the Safehouse as clearly as though it were right in front of me. The images replayed in my mind like a macabre slide show. Over and over. Streams of crimson, glazed eyes, fallen children. Alec, ravaging the poor Fae in the most horrifying of ways. The familiar rush of aching pain that seized my chest when I realized I couldn’t stop him, and every time I thought of those I had failed. Because that was the truth of it. I had failed them all. So many had paid that price, too. Small, beautiful Fae.
Children like her, like the girl that I had—
A sob shuddered up my frame, tears streaming from my eyes. I tried to blink them away, to clear the images. But nothing could shake my remorse. The cost was too high. I had let the Fae shield me and they had paid with their lives, their loved ones, their children.
I washed my face with a bit of water from a bottle in my bag, trying to pretend it was water and not tears that stained my cheeks. Somehow I managed to pull on shorts and a shirt, but when I finished, when the emotions were still too heavy and the thought of facing those above deck twisted my stomach into knots, I wedged myself into a shadowed corner at the end of the bunks and slid my earbuds in. I cranked the volume. Closed my eyes. Inhaled slowly.
My hands trembled.
Children. The word played on repeat in my head every time I had a minute to myself.
I buried my face in my knees, tried to focus on the soft piano music in my ears. Tried to breathe as my body trembled at the looping words and accusations that echoed in my mind.
My adoptive father had killed them, but I carried the guilt. Mordecai would never have attacked the Safehouse, if not for me. I was a coward. Am a coward. I didn’t learn my lesson, didn’t stay to face Mordecai or at least try to drag his attention away from the Fae.
I was doing something, though. Rebel Leader had given Tarik a map, a means to find other Fae who might be willing to help us. But we had to go through the veil, and for that, we needed the crystal.
That damned crystal.
My body ached still from whatever Alec had injected into me. Flames of pain lapped through my insides, duller but still present. I shivered. I wanted to chuck the stone in Tarik’s pocket off the boat. Probably would have, if Tarik didn’t need the power it contained so desperately.
If we all didn’t need it so desperately.
Because that cursed crystal was the key to the Fae realm. I didn’t know many of the details; I wasn't even sure how much Tarik knew, and I hadn’t pressed.