I lower my eyes, blinking to shield my tears. A lady does not cry, it is a weakness, but that is the first time anyone has ever said that, has acknowledged that I lost him too. I miss him every day. He always used to say that when we were older, we would marry.
We would rule this court and change it for the better.
It was a childish dream, a warm sentiment that would have never happened. His mother, the queen, would have never allowed it. But his death…it changed her for the worse, and now our court suffers even more. So if I can do anything to help, I will.
“Please let me heal you,” I implore, as I swallow back the tears and raise our joined hands. Her nails are short and stubby, dirty, and her fingers are chunky and covered in scars and calluses where mine are pale and long, unblemished and untouched. Our differences are clear, stark, but she doesn’t shy away. She squeezes my hand tighter, accepting me and my help, even though our kinds are supposed to hate each other.
“If you wish,” she concedes, but I can tell from her tone she doesn’t believe I can or will. When you’ve been trodden on for long enough, you eventually start to believe that’s where you belong.
Covering her hand with my other one, I close my eyes and focus on that well of power inside of me, aching to escape into the world. To heal, to create, to grow. I hide the true strength of it, knowing being that powerful will draw unwanted attention. As far as everyone knows, I am a healer.
Fae nobles only have one true calling.
Blooming, healing, and smithing…only queens have more than one. I am no queen, therefore stating I have more than one would make them not trust me. I would either be a liar or a danger to the crown. I know that.
I didn’t when I was a child and used to show off my powers, luckily only down here in the fields, and the people who witnessed it have never spoken a word, and the only noble who knows is dead. I used to wonder why me, why I have these powers, but wondering gets me nowhere. I have them, and now I need to find a way to live with them and keep myself alive.
I let it flow out now, only part of it. I can see the silver wisps escaping me and wrapping around our joined hands before sinking into her skin, racing through her veins, and looking for the problem.
I push more into her, spreading it through her body. She gasps from the feel of it, but I keep my eyes closed and focused on the task at hand.
Saving her.
It feels her organs and bones, searching for the issue… I find it. A dark spot lies above her heart. Not medically, but magically. She has either been bitten by a dark creature or wild magic has invaded her, which is not surprising, seeing as though she’s near the Forbidden Forest.
I carefully wrap my magic around it, so it does not infect my own. Holding it in a silver bubble, I slowly extract it from her body. I feel her heart beating, her breathing heavy as I pull it free. She lets out a tiny scream, but I clench my eyes, concentrating on that ball. If I let it go, we all die.
Once it’s free of her body, I release her hands and place it in mine. I open my eyes and peer down into my cupped hands, and quickly stand and rush outside behind the hut. Crouching at the edge of the forest, I open my palms.
The black ball of magic swirls and changes, not attacking because I mean it no harm, and with one last swirl, it shoots from my hand and back into the trees. I could have killed it, snuffed it out, but it’s a force of nature.
Nature needs both dark and light to survive.
Standing, I brush off my hands and head back to the hut where the woman is hugging her child. When she spots me, she jumps from the bed.
“Thank you,” she cries, and throws her arms around me. I freeze under the hug, unused to the warmth moving through me. This is entirely inappropriate amongst the nobles. We do not touch, we do not show affection, it is a weakness. Yet this human offers it so willingly, simply for receiving help. I close my eyes and soak in the warmth and happiness that bursts through me from both the use of my powers and myself for being able to save just one person.
One person at a time, that’s how it starts, Alej. One person can change the world if they try. They just have to be strong enough.
Cail was right, and I realise something. I will never stop trying to change our world for the better, to help these people. To save them.
Even if it costs me my life.
Slate
The magic here usually leaves me alone, recognising me as one of them, but tonight, it’s swirling through the air. Something is wrong, there is someone in the forest who shouldn’t be. More than one someones, if my hearing is correct. Their booted feet are loud, and I can hear their hearts hammering from here and smell their nerves and sweat.
Hunters.
Human, but magic as well.
His hunters.
The one who cursed me to live a life as a wolf, who captured me all those years ago, who tortured me…
“If you would just do as I tell you, this would all be easier on you.”
I lock my jaw against the scream that wants to escape my lips as he takes another vial of blood, draining me, his white coat stained with it. His golden hair is pushed back, and his wings are hidden. When I was first brought here, I thought they were humans, but I was wrong. He is using the humans and our species alike.
Experimenting, but what for?
Why does he need me, a god? How did he even find me?
“Your blood is unique, wolf god, as are your brothers’ blood. It is the key to unlocking our genes, to creating more stronger and better creatures. But blood is not the only way.” He looks over at the girl and sighs, the human girl.
Who is in pieces, thanks to my wolf.
I can barely look at her, disgust and self-hate filling me. I did that, my animal. He might have injected me with those burning medicines which make me feral, but I am a god! I should have been able to stop it. I’ve never had an issue controlling my wolf before, we are one, but since he started shooting that stuff into my veins, there is a barrier.
The wolf killed her.
Ate her heart.
I can still taste it on my tongue, her blood, and hear her screams as she tried to fight. I can feel the nail marks she scoured into my muzzle.
I am a monster.
I am losing myself.
“If you had simply mated with her, this would have been a lot easier. Clearly, you are unwilling, your animal is opposed to any female I bring. It’s probably the mating instincts, since wolves feel them a lot more than other species.” He talks as if I am not here, as if I’m an experiment, which I guess I am. “But it wouldn’t make him wild…unless you already have a mate. That would cause your wolf to attack anyone he saw as a threat to her and your bond.”
I don’t answer, he never listens. I don’t have a mate…we don’t have a mate. We are gods, we don’t get them. We are doomed to be alone all our lives.
Gabriel sighs again. “Never mind, I can use you for something else now that you are useless to me. I have all the blood I need, but I need to unlock the formula that will allow me to control the change…” He looks up then, those angel eyes locking on me. Cold and evil. “You are the key.”
I shake away the memories. They have finally come for me. I knew it would happen. He still needed me, needed my blood, yet his own hubris was my escape. He made me stronger, harder, and more powerful. The injection fused with my powerful blood until, no prison he created could hold me and I escaped.