“Change your mind about me handling shit?”
“No.” I shook my head at his bloodthirsty ways. “I just wanted to know if these sheets need to be changed.”
“You are safe, Your Highness, from all bodily fluids.” My cousin laughed outright against the back of my head. “I met them at breakfast this morning. We were just getting started.”
“That is a relief. I don’t think I could get back up anyway, and that’s very disgusting to think about sleeping on.” I allowed my eyes to close on those words. “And I would have.”
He played with the sleeve of my new sweater. “Trix?”
“What?” I mumbled, almost asleep.
“Who gave you this?”
“Nice try,” I slurred, my body shutting down. “I’m going to pass out all day and all night. Stay with me?”
“For a while,” he assured. “Go to sleep.”
“Oh…and if any Fae comes for me in my sleep, kill them.”
Solemnly, he said his vow, “Always.”
CHAPTER FOUR
Annoyance of a king:
Why must shopping be such a pain in the ass?
There’s a reason why I have servants who do this for me—errands are not something I enjoy, nor do I have time for them.
Alas, some purchases are too private for others to see.
And when unwanted surprises occur during my secretive endeavors?
It pisses me off even more.
“YOU ARE REALLY cutting it close on this gift.” Bishop shook his head of obsidian hair, the ends of his locks brushing his shoulders. Instead of the ponytail he preferred wearing, our stylist had straightened his hair to perfection and only allowed him a sparse six gorilla teeth to wear in his mane, parting it down the center with the respectful accessories. He squinted into the sun, marking the time. “There are only a few hours until the party starts.”
“I do not wish to go to this anniversary celebration at all. King Traevon’s love for his soul mate is nauseating to listen to—and it’ll be even worse tonight.” I scanned the hostile environment, even though my personal guards were stationed all throughout the Elf Kingdom’s capital city, Gatlin Grove, watching over our movements. The elven sentries in red that lined the strangely curvy, cobblestone streets were rather irritating, but they did keep the elves from approaching us. “Where is this Fae damned bookstore? I thought you said it was close to our inn. We’ve been walking the streets for a half hour.”
“It’s two more turns, by my count.” Bishop shrugged his shoulders and glanced at me from the corner of his honey-brown eyes. He teased—with a perfected elf’s snooty inflection, “Are you afraid your attire will get dirty if we walk much longer? I must say, you look quite dashing in the black leather and fur.”
I growled loudly, startling an elven mother and her daughter walking behind the guards. I bared my teeth at them before turning my glare on my actual target. “Fuck you, asshole. I cannot believe she thinks I should wear this damned thing.” I pulled at the black, short-furred vest that hugged my bare chest. “I hate this Fae shit, and she knows it.”
“Just untie it. It won’t be as tight then. Appease the stylist and yourself.” Bishop waved his hands at the constrictive clothing. “You already ripped the top one. What’s a few more?”
I grunted. That was advice I could live with.
By the time we arrived at the bookstore, all the ties from my sleeveless vest littered the cobblestone street. I held up a hand, and I stated evenly, “I’m going in alone. Go explore for a few minutes.”
“I can’t stand when you do this,” Bishop hissed. “How am I supposed to guard you if I’m shopping in the next store?”
“Easy answer. You don’t guard me.” I smirked as his scowl increased. “No one here will be able to harm me. Go.”
Bishop snarled and stomped in the direction of a sweets store—the gorilla shifter favored candy, even though he’d deny it to his last breath.
I chuckled and opened the circular, wooden door to the bookstore, a small bell tinkling above, alerting the staff they had a customer. I ducked down and entered the establishment, pleased when I saw the second floor had been removed, and there were books all the way to the top of the building. I straightened to my full height, never understanding why the elves made their doors so small—some elves were six feet tall…like their damned king.
“One moment!” A masculine, harried voice called from the back of the building. “I’ll be right out.”
“Take your time,” I answered loudly, knowing my voice would bring the shopkeeper running—the “shifter accent.” “I’m in no hurry. It’s—”
“I am here. What do you want?” The shopkeeper brushed off his hands, dust flying out around him. His elven, blue eyes looked up at me, and he stopped utterly in his tracks. He mumbled, “Oh shit.”
I lifted one black eyebrow.
Terror rounded his gaze as he swept down into a formal bow—it was horribly executed. His voice trembled as he spoke, “You honor me, Your Royal Highness.”
I tapped the top of his head lightly. “You may rise.”
The shopkeeper straightened and wrung his hands together. “What may I help you with today, Your Royal Highness?”
“I am looking for two books. The first, one of your most beautiful portrait books of flora. And the second…a more risqué elven book. If you’ll show me to those sections, I’ll handle it from there.”
His blue eyes blinked, the revolting white around his iris showing even more from his shock. “A risqué book?”
“Yes, it is a prank gift; a beginner’s book to making love with an elf.” I cleared my throat, extremely proud with myself that I didn’t spit on the floor as I said those words aloud—or show tiger fangs and snarl like I wished. My black eyebrows furrowed low over my eyes, with a thought. “You do have those here, correct? Or is there a different store for something like that?”
The shopkeeper calmed himself and managed an honest chuckle. “Oh, yes. We have those here, too. Let me show you the sections, and then I need to check on my troublesome assistant for a moment. But that won’t take long, Your Royal Highness.”
I dipped my head in thanks and followed behind him. He indicated the different sections of rows where I’d find what I needed and finally left me in peace—taking that Fae damned elven enunciation with him, mercifully. I perused the shelves in the silence of the store, finding there were many books on breeding.
I grabbed one from the shelf and opened it to a random page.
I snapped it shut instantly.
Am I really doing this?
Do I really care to better myself on this subject…
Why in the Fairy did this happen to me?
My fall from grace was fucking humiliating.
I snarled softly and opened the book again.
I’d never been a bad lover. Never. I wasn’t going to be one now because I had the most scandalous and physically offensive soul mate the Fae could have cursed me with.
I snapped my teeth in irritation, biting at the air. I continued to growl as I flipped through the pages sightlessly, willing myself not to tear this place apart. I stopped on one page and cocked my head, immediately calming from the confusion that boggled my mind, all because of a picture drawn inside, diagramming an elven cunt.