I made a promise to keep it trill.
Part of that means being real about what’s required of me as the head.
You should’ve known the man in me wouldn’t let you take that charge.
I gotta go away to protect those I love.
I pray you can accept and respect my decision.
If you can’t, I understand that too.
I love you, Mak
Jason
Makayla couldn’t believe what she was reading. It didn’t make sense. Had he brought her here just to go back home and turn himself in?
“No,” Makayla muttered, leaping from the bed.
She rushed to the closet, crying out softly at the sight of Jason’s bags being gone. After slipping into her sandals and throwing a robe over her body, Makayla grabbed the suite key and quickly made her way outside. She didn’t care about the fact that she hadn’t even brushed her teeth and washed her face or even combed her hair… she needed Kannon to tell her that this wasn’t real.
As she beat on his door, she bounced from one leg to the other, praying that Jason was just playing some kind of trick on her.
“I told him I’d do the time,” she whispered to herself, willing her tears not to fall.
Beating harder, her head shook as she refused to accept Jason’s disappearance from her life. As soon as Kannon opened the door, his face told her all she needed to know. Before she could stop herself, she was falling weakly into his arms as she sobbed. Yeah, Jason had always prepared her for a moment like this. She knew what came with the territory of dealing with a nigga in the streets. But all the mental preparation in the world did nothing to soothe her aching heart as it finally accepted the fact that Jason was gone forever…
Five years later…
10
Makayla
May 2020
For the past five years, self-love had been the best love for Makayla. After Jason removed himself from her life, her focus shifted to herself… until she found out she was pregnant. It was hard as fuck accepting the gift Jason had left behind. Instead of accepting that that was the way she’d always have a piece of Jason, she began to resent him for leaving her more. Especially when she found out she was having a boy. A son who came out looking exactly like his father.
Every day Makayla looked into her son’s eyes, she saw Jason, and that was a torture that she would never forgive him for. Had it not been for Kannon helping her every step of the way, Makayla was sure she would have gone crazy. She didn’t realize how dependent on Jason she’d become for love, acceptance… shit, everything. So when he left, everything changed. Everything changed, except her bond with Kannon. They helped each other grieve, and the baby gave them both a silver lining of hope. In a way, their bond changed, too… it grew deeper.
Makayla ended up staying in the Maldives for two years. By the time she came back home to Memphis, no one really questioned whose baby she had. No one in Jason’s camp outside of Kannon and Rico ever saw Austin, and they were the only two who knew he was Jason’s son. She hadn’t even told Rico or confirmed when he asked… she didn’t have to. That was the only way she could keep her son’s father’s identity a mystery. One look at him… and everyone else in Jason’s life would know who Austin belonged to.
When Makayla first made the decision to hide Austin’s paternity, it was because she was bitter, angry, and hurt over him leaving her. There was nothing he could do for either of them behind bars, plus, Jason had cut off all contact with her anyway after a few months. He stopped calling and writing and took her off his visitation list, though she hadn’t gone yet because she wasn’t in the States. It wasn’t until Makayla called the warden personally to speak to Jason that he told her it was best if she completely removed herself from his life, and she hadn’t spoken to Jason since.
That was yet another blow to her heart, but as soon as she returned to Memphis, everything they’d left behind came back to the surface. She remembered Kendall, and Kannon, and the indescribable grief and pain that had consumed him. It was in that moment that Makayla’s perspective shifted. She decided it was best for her son if Jason nor anyone else attached to him knew Austin was his son. It was safest that way. If anyone came after Austin because of Jason, Kannon, or even herself… she’d paint the whole fucking city red. Austin became… a piece of Jason that no one else had or would ever have. One that Makayla would cherish forever.
After taking in a few breaths, Makayla checked the time on the clock on her nightstand. It was how she kept herself from immediately getting lost in the news and social media on her phone first thing in the morning. As always, her body was up at four a.m. It didn’t matter what time she’d go to sleep, she’d always wake up at four.
Rolling over onto her stomach, Makayla’s body bent until she was on her hands and knees. She prayed, then did bed yoga. Once she was lying flat again, her hands found their way between her legs. She brought herself to a slow, quick orgasm before hopping out of bed and heading to the bathroom. By the time she was done taking care of her hygiene and getting dressed, it was five, which gave her one more hour to herself before she’d have to wake Austin up for school.
He was four, and Makayla had taken as much pride in making sure he was ready for elementary school as she did the rest of the kids at her head start. After working there since the age of twenty, Makayla had gone on to become director. Though she didn’t need to work to make money, Makayla received so much pleasure from what she did that she couldn’t see herself doing anything else.
Before heading down to get her tea started, Makayla picked up the small picture of her and Jason that rested on the corner of her dresser. She ran her finger across his face before sitting it face down on her dresser and heading out. When she made it to her already lit kitchen, it didn’t surprise her to find Kannon there. Their homes were directly next to each other in the gated community they’d moved into when they returned to Memphis.
A smile naturally flexed her face when she walked over to him. They’d always been good friends, but something had shifted between them over the past five years. Something that pulled them closer and showed them deeper levels of one another. Maybe it was the fact that they’d spent so much time together at their lowest points and helped pull one another out the valley. Whatever it was, Makayla was grateful even more now to have Kannon in her life.
She made her way to his side, and he quickly wrapped his arm around her and placed a kiss to the top of her head. Their exchange had become natural over the years. They both were affectionate, and when Makayla expressed how loved she felt when she was held, Kannon made it his responsibility to do just that. There was something about the feeling of safety and security that she felt when she was close to him… whether he was holding her, her hand, or merely resting his hand on her thigh.
“Good morning,” he grumbled, making Makayla smile.
Kannon had never been a morning person; in fact, he would be pissed as fuck when woken up out of his sleep, but he always woke up hours earlier than he needed to to take Austin to school with Makayla. He said it was out of habit, but Makayla knew he was still a little shaken up over what happened to Kendall. Very rarely did he allow her to do anything with Austin out in public alone. If he wasn’t there, he’d have guards on them.