Grace stared at Aaron and could feel the shock of his words rushing through her body and overtaking her features. She didn't understand him one bit. It wasn't as though they had tried to have a baby to save their failing marriage. They had a baby because they were so in love, they wanted to expand their family. Grace wanted to be a mother, and Aaron wanted to expand his circle of stability.
Why didn't he want to try again?
Why was this so final for him?
Her heart was broken, too. She was grieving, too. She felt like the pain of this would live with her forever.
Miscarriage is unfair.
Grace and Aaron did everything they could to make sure she had a healthy pregnancy. They did everything right. It didn't make sense that they would lose the baby because of someone else—some freak accident. She couldn't comprehend it, but she wasn't about to give up, either. She loved Aaron, and she wanted to have a family with him.
But he didn't want that anymore.
He gave up.
So, she gave up in return.
They spent the next three months stuck living in misery under the same roof until they figured out what to do about their marriage and their lease, barely speaking.
Aaron was gloomy and so resentful of the sight of Grace that she could hardly bear to be around him. It didn't occur to her until that third month that their marriage was really over.
Her husband's way of coping was to wallow, but Grace went a different path.
If my life is figuratively over, she told herself, I want to go down in flames. She took a self-destructive path that involved partying with friends and staying out all hours of the night. She remembered it was a Friday night when she came home with a deep head buzz and found Aaron sitting on the edge of the bed they once shared. He had been sleeping downstairs for weeks, and she had been surprised to see him there.
He sat with his head down and his legs spread, hands steepled together in thought.
“Did you bring somebody home?” he asked.
“What?” she said, wobbling against the doorframe. “No, of course not.”
“Have you been with anyone else?”
Her heart sank. “No,” she said. “Have you?”
Aaron shook his head, but he still wouldn’t look at her. “Trust me,” he said. “That is the last thing on my mind.”
“Then why would you think it would be on mine?” she asked. “You know me better than that.”
“Wrong,” he said. “I have no idea who you are these days. You’re not acting like yourself.”
Grace leaned against the doorjamb and crossed her arms. “I’m not myself.”
“Yeah,” he said with a breath. “I can see that. You’re never home, you never talk to me.”
“You left me, remember?” she answered with a sudden snap. “You can’t rip my heart out and then complain that I’m not smiling while you do it.”
“That’s not what I meant,” he said, finally raising his eyes to hers. “I’m concerned about you.”
“Don’t be,” she said, finally leaving the doorway and heading deeper into the room. She took her jacket off and tossed it in the hamper before inspecting her face in the full-length mirror next to the closet. “That’s not your job. You’re not my husband anymore, remember?”
“That’s what I wanted to talk about.”
Grace didn’t flinch, continuing to brush her fingertip against her lashes to get them to stand up. But inside, her heart was pounding. She wanted him to say he changed his mind.
“I was upset when I said I couldn’t do this anymore,” he said.
His words were like a dream. Grace wanted to cry. She wanted to drop the act and remind herself that she didn’t have to fall into a well of self-destruction or guilt to cope with how awful she felt. She didn’t have to push him away or numb herself to his feelings. She had found her life again, and her life was with Aaron.
But her excitement was short-lived.
Aaron rubbed his hands together uncomfortably. “But it’s been months now, and you didn’t fight for us,” he said. “And you know what? I didn’t, either.”
“You said it was over!” she argued. “What was I supposed to do? Force you to stay? You said you couldn’t look at me, Aaron. Was I supposed to guilt you into staying and torture you with the sight of me? Give me a break.”
“Divorce papers are on the dresser,” he said, gesturing toward the antique tallboy they had painstakingly stripped, painted, and sealed after they found it on a curbside shortly after moving in together.
“Are you kidding me?” she said, turning around in a daze. She grabbed the papers off the counter and opened them.
“I had my lawyer fudge the date,” he said. “You’re supposed to be separated for six months before they’ll consider granting a divorce but…I want out, and it’s pretty clear that you do, too, so I didn’t think you’d mind.”
I didn’t think you’d mind.
She replayed the words over and over in her head.
“Hey, Grace. Just took a casual stroll to my lawyer’s office and requested we get out of this miserable relationship ASAP.”
“Just thought I’d finish shattering your heart as quickly as I could. That’s cool, right? I mean, I didn’t think you’d mind.”
Grace signed the papers without a second thought. She was too furious to think clearly. If she had taken the time to look over the contract, she would have realized that Aaron had generously given himself everything that was left of their marriage.
Their car.
Their savings.
Their dog.
But going through a divorce wasn't all bad.
Well, it was mostly bad. Mostly horrible, actually.
But it also showed her who her real friends were. Maisie had been her best friend for as long as she could remember, and now they would be living together, and Grace could take one solid step forward to rebuilding her life.
3
Trent
The following week at the ranch was one of the busiest in a long time for Trent. There were new horses, tree trimming, and plenty of Texas weddings to keep his staff on their toes.
His solace was knowing that come the weekend, he would get to see Bill and Maisie. They came over Saturday evening and let their little ones play on the pad he’d bought for Bex to play on. They looked like blue puzzle pieces and provided a soft place for the kiddos to hang out.
The adults busied themselves in beer and wine, and after catching up from their crazy collective weeks, Maisie inevitably brought Lily up.
Bill had been talking about a near-death experience he’d listened to on a podcast about an internet stalker.
“You know what makes me crazy?” Maisie said thoughtfully, popping a finger into the air. “Lily isn’t even online or anything.”
“What do you mean?” Bill asked, cocking a brow. “As in, she doesn’t have any socials?”
“Yeah, there's no update about her anywhere! It's like she either deleted all of her social media or she blocked all of us,” she scoffed, then turned her attention to Trent and raised her glass, saying, “Don't tell me you haven't noticed?”