“Well, what do you propose I do instead?”
“You should totally come home with me for Thanksgiving!”
“Oh no, I couldn’t,” I protest, thinking both of the intrusion on her family and of Maddox, and the look on his face when he turned the light on in the club and realized he had been kissing me. My cheeks burn at the memory.
“Don’t be silly! It’ll be a blast. There are always tons of people there because my foster parents host their whole extended family, plus they invite all the kids they have fostered over the years. You’ll fit right in!”
“I don’t know…” I grumble, still worried about Maddox.
“I absolutely insist. We’ll leave tomorrow morning, stay for the meal, then come back. It’ll be fun, and everyone will be happy to see you!”
I sigh. I don’t really want to go, mainly because of the awkwardness with Maddox. I have no idea how he’ll act toward me after what happened the last time we saw each other, but I can only imagine it will be uncomfortable. But I know, if I refuse, Clara will feel hurt and hold it against me. Plus, I don’t relish the prospect of spending the holiday holed up in the office, even though there is plenty of work for me to do. As devoted as I am, it just seems a little sad.
“Okay,” I agree. “Thanks, Clara.”
I’ll just have to deal with the weirdness of seeing Maddox after kissing him at the club. It’s unavoidable, really. I’m so close with Clara that I would end up seeing him at some point or another anyway. I might as well get it over with sooner than later.
Plus, I’m sure Maddox doesn’t even care enough about me or what happened for it to even be awkward for him. He’s always treated me like a little kid, so he probably sees making out with me as a gross mistake that he wants to forget. And I happen to know, both from little things Clara has mentioned and from seeing him bring different girls around the house when I was hanging out with Clara growing up, Maddox is a huge ladies’ man. So, a little tongue action with me in the club is probably forgettable for him.
But it wasn’t for me.
Also, I think I remember hearing something from Clara about him having a serious girlfriend, which is very unlike Maddox. It was Jessica, or Jamie, or one of those J names. I guess they’re either not dating anymore or Maddox doesn’t think they are so serious after all.
The next morning, I dress carefully for Thanksgiving with the Millers. I try on and discard about a dozen different outfits before I finally settle on a long-sleeved green velvet wrap dress, black sheer tights, and black booties. It’s formal enough without trying too hard, and modest while hugging my curves in all the right places. Green is my favorite color to wear; it brings out my eyes. I leave my blonde hair down in loose waves around my shoulders. I want to look hot, but appropriate, and feel confident when I face Maddox.
“You sure are quiet,” remarks Clara from behind the wheel of her car as we drive toward her foster parents’ house.
I offer her a half-hearted smile. “Yeah, I’m just tired. I stayed up doing some reading for school last night.”
Which is true, but the real reason I’m so quiet is I’m trying to push down the nervous butterflies I feel in my stomach about seeing Maddox again. I always get nervous around him, but now, after our kiss, it’s one hundred times worse.
“You work too hard,” admonishes Clara for about the millionth time.
“So you’ve said,” I sigh.
“Well, if you’re not going to entertain me, let me tell you about what I did last night,” says Clara, before launching into a long and detailed story about an awful date she had with a guy she found through a dating app. I try to pay attention as best as I can and distract myself from my anxiety, which is growing greater and greater the closer we get to our destination.
Too quickly, we pull up in front of the Millers’ house. The cute, two-story brick house with a cheerful yellow front door looks just as it did throughout my childhood, and I take comfort in the familiarity.
“Thanks again for inviting me,” I say to Clara sincerely, as we clamber out of her car and start walking toward the house. Clara is practically my sister, and if I can’t be with my real family, spending the holiday with her is the next best thing and I’m truly grateful she has included me.
“Of course!” she chirps, grabbing my hand and giving it a quick squeeze before letting go. “It’ll be more fun with you here anyway!”
I try to focus on Clara and how nice it will be to see the rest of the Millers instead of my nerves about Maddox.
Clara pushes open the front door and walks through the foyer with me trailing behind. We are both instantly engulfed in a huge hug my Mrs. Miller, and her scent—fresh-baked bread and lilac perfume—fills me with nostalgia. I can’t get one of my mom’s hugs today, but a hug from Mrs. Miller is nearly just as comforting. I’m glad I came.
“I’m so happy to see you girls! Let me look at you!” Mrs. Miller says, pulling back from us but still clutching our elbows. “Madison! I’m so glad you were able to make it! You look as beautiful as ever. Too skinny, though. Clara’s always telling me how busy you are! We’ve got to get you to relax and fatten up a little while you’re here today!”
“Thanks for having me, Mrs. Miller,” I smile.
“Of course! You’re always welcome!”
I wonder if Maddox shares that sentiment.
I don’t have to wait long to find out, however, when we turn the corner into the living room, where a bunch of people is milling around sipping beers or mimosas. Even in a room full of people, my eyes immediately land on Maddox’s dark hair. He is standing next to Axel, both of them deep in conversation with another guy who looks about their age, probably another former foster child of the Millers.
As soon as I see him, he turns away from the conversation and locks eyes with me. His face, smiling before while listening to the others, changes quickly to lack any expression at all. I can’t read him, but it’s clear he isn’t exactly thrilled to see me.
I think about his face in that little room in the club when he turned the lights on and saw it was me. His shock and alarm were obvious. Then I think about that kiss, his big hands on my body, his warm lips pressed firmly against mine. I shiver involuntarily at the memory.
Hours seem to pass as we stare at each other, even though it can only really be a matter of seconds. Then, infuriatingly, Maddox turns back to his conversation without acknowledging me at all.
I feel my cheeks burn. I’ve never had the same effect on him as he has had on me, so why should today be any different?
I guess some small, silly part of me hoped that our kiss would make him really see me, see that I’m a grown woman, and an attractive one, if I do say so myself. I’ve had a crush on this guy since elementary school, and just some sort of acknowledgment that he felt even a fraction of the same would be so gratifying.
But if anything, he’s more dismissive than ever.
Fine. Two can play that game. I turn back to Clara and Mrs. Miller.
“Can I get you girls a drink? We’ve got mimosas, beer, cider, juice, water…”
“I’ll have a mimosa!” says Clara.
“Me too,” I say gratefully.
It’s going to be a long afternoon.