They were in her house, waiting for Aunt Becky. If he could just not talk, he’d be so much more attractive.
“What are you thinking, and why are we still here? Shouldn’t we get a place?” Liam asked.
“Umm, do you really want me to answer any of those questions?” Elissa asked.
Liam turned to face her. “Yes, I would. We’re going to be together for a minute, and I’m not a psychic. I think we should be as open as possible.”
“Okay, we’re waiting for my aunt Becky to come. She needs to see you before I can leave and find a place with you.”
Liam looked back at her. “Are you serious?”
Elissa rolled her eyes. “Yes, I am. I hope you remember that we do things a certain way here in Chusada.”
“Yes, the backward way. You want to stay here instead of the hotel, I can’t believe it,” he muttered.
Elissa slapped the table, and Liam’s head popped up.
“Let me be clear about how this is going to work. The people in this town are my family. If the rumors are to be believed, they’re your family too. That means if you are going to stay in the town while you get yourself out of hot water, then you better remember the rules and fall in line. People are always more important.”
“Are they more important than eighty thousand dollars?”
She was going to knock him on the head, roll him in the living room carpet and then dump it over a cliff. Yes, that would work. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath.
“If you are going to make it through this supposed wedding, you’re going to have to get on board!”
Liam held his hands out. “I’m here, aren’t I?”
Elissa could feel the migraine coming. She just had to make it to the rest of the day.
“First, you need to say, sir and ma’am.”
“What?”
“You’re new, and it would be rude if you didn’t. We need to make sure we get all the clearances from your grandmother and my aunt Becky and –“
“Hold up! We’re not in high school. You do know I run a company that makes millions and employees thousands?”
Elissa smiled as she leaned across the table. “That might be, but right now, our marriage is the only thing that’s going to save all of that. So I suggest you remember what it was like to be a humble person so you can survive the moment.”
“I’m humble! I want you to know people think I’m charming!” Liam protested.
“Hmm, we’ll see.” Elissa snorted. Her conversation was interrupted by the front door opening. Elissa stood up and waited for Liam to stand. She cleared her throat.
“Yes?”
“Get up! You’re supposed to go first,” she hissed.
“It’s your house.”
“You go first in case there’s an intruder, you get hit first,” she said as if he were a simpleton.
Liam looked confused, but he stood up and went to where he had heard the door open.
“Hello?” Colleen called out. When Elissa came stepped from behind Liam, Colleen’s smile grew wider.
“Oh, I can see I got here just in the nick of time. This whole situation is looking good, Elissa. He came to the door first, good touch. Now, confess to your friend, you had to tell him to do this, didn’t you?”
Elissa smiled as she nodded her head.
Liam looked at them both.
“Why is she here? Do I need Travers?”
“Oh, puh-lease. I practically live here,” Colleen said. “Aunt Becky and company are coming. I wanted to give you a heads up.”
“And company?” Liam asked.
Elissa turned to him and nodded. “It won’t be that bad. They just want to come in and make sure you’re a good person.”
“I don’t know who’s coming in, but she’s riding with the sisters,” Colleen said.
“The sisters?” Liam asked.
Elissa waved it off. “The sisters are the women of the church. Just make sure to talk up when they’re here. Some of them are a little hard of hearing.”
“Really? Do we really have to do this?” he moaned.
Colleen smiled. “Oh boy, this is only the beginning. I think you’ve been away from home a lot longer than I gave you credit for.”
“I think you two should come outside and meet them. So you can meet them and go,” Colleen suggested.
“Good idea. Go out, and we’ll be right there,” Elissa said. Colleen hesitated and then left.
“I’m not going to be mean to Colleen,” Liam droned.
“It wasn’t even a thought,” Elissa said as she brushed by the subject. “I want to talk about some words you can and can’t say.”
“Words,” Liam was confused. “I think you may be taking this a bit far. I talk to my grandmother all the time. She doesn’t have a problem with the way I talk.”
“That was when you were a single man on the loose, and no one told you better. You were sowing your oats and the such-‘
“Sowing my oats? I’m not that old!” Liam protested.
“Exactly what is not that old?” Elissa asked.
“I’m in my late thirties, okay.”
Elissa grimaced. “Wow, you are old?”
“What?”
“Yes, I mean you have money, and you aren’t hard to look at you don’t have wife it makes a person think something has got to be wrong with you. Just so we can cover the basics. Do you have any diseases?”
“No.”
“Any bad or illegal habits like drugs or alcohol?”
“No, I don’t put that stuff in my body!”
“Good, good. Do you have any ex-wives, girlfriends, or children?”
“No, no, and definitely no. I know no one will believe me. It seems, but I spend all of my time running a hotel chain and making sure it makes money.”
Elissa held out her hands. “Don’t get testy, I’m just asking, and I won’t be the last one.”
“Can we go now?” Liam pouted.
“No, we have to do words and signals.”
“Tell me you’re joking,” Liam said.
Elissa smoothed her shirt and went to the door, then began counting off of her fingers. “One. I’m not joking. You can’t say lie or any curses.”
“Lie? If you don’t lie down, what do you lo float?”
“Lie as in tell a lie. You can say fib. Everyone is older than you, so be mindful.”
“Is Fib even a word?”
“It is for you!”
“No cursing.”
“I got that one.”
“Good, and if you say something or begin to talk about an inappropriate subject, we will have a code word, sparrow.”
“A code for inappropriate what – Listen, I can make sure nothing inappropriate comes out my mouth.”
Before Elissa could reply, Colleen stuck her head back in. “Time to go, people! What’s the code word?”
“Sparrow,” Elissa said. Colleen nodded.
“I live in a civilized world. I won’t need that word.”
Elissa looked at him doubtfully. “I’m hoping so. Now let’s get out there.”
Elissa had just closed the door behind them when she saw that her aunt Becky coming up the lane. A small measure of relief coursed through her body. Aunt Becky loved her and would do anything for her. This was actually the best situation there could be.