I chewed on my lip. Maybe I shouldn’t have pushed him though. Was it too much to ask someone to talk to their cheating ex’s father?
Early the next morning, I was standing in the waiting area on the top floor of the Sutherland Bank building.
Mr. Sutherland’s secretary wrinkled her nose when she saw me. I resisted the urge to tug at the hem of my skirt. I was in my standard all-black wedding planner attire, though it was a little snug in the hip area. Wedding planning was stressful, and I coped by snacking and drinking and more snacking.
Be a ladyboss.
“I’m here about the invoice,” I said, hoping I sounded authoritative.
“You’ll have to wait; he’s in a meeting.”
I sat in one of the large leather chairs across from two middle-aged men in suits and scrolled through my phone. Imogen, the latest bride, was high maintenance and also picky. This latest string of text messages was about the color of the dress. She thought the ivory wasn’t white enough.
Brea: Did you see Imogen’s messages? I swear I’m already almost done with this dress. She cannot change the color.
Brea: She wants to bleach it! Handmade silk lace and she wants to BLEACH IT.
Ivy: I’ll talk to her, it’s probably just nerves.
“Well, well, if it isn’t the person who ruined my wedding.”
I looked up to see Camilla tapping her foot in front of me.
“You lost the groom and screwed up my big moment,” Camilla said.
So we’re rewriting history, and it’s only been a couple of days? Alrighty then…
“Everyone liked the gift bags,” I said weakly, because what else could I say? I didn’t sleep with the groom’s father, that was you? I also didn’t destroy the wedding cake, that was you? And oh, by the way, that was a ten-thousand-dollar cake, so pay up?
“You did it on purpose,” she hissed at me.
I gestured helplessly.
“We had a contract. My team went above and beyond on the wedding. I just need to you to pay the final invoice, please. Then we can consider this business relationship over.”
The middle-aged men in the lobby looked uncomfortable. Camilla’s father hurried out of his office.
“Yes, yes, of course that’s why you’re here—to settle up!” he said loudly smiling at the two men as he ushered me into his office. “Honestly,” Orson Sutherland said to me after shutting the door. “Of course we’re going to pay you. You didn’t need to come here and make a scene.”
I forced myself to relax.
I will never ever not take the money up front again. Never ever ever.
“That was not my intention,” I said, using my best professional voice. “I’m sure it’s all a misunderstanding. I could have simply sent you the invoice. I really didn’t need to come all the way down here, though your secretary insisted.” I slid the paperwork across his desk.
“Now look here,” Orson said, “I run a major financial institution. These things work on cycles. You’re just going to have to wait.”
Or you could just write me a check, because you probably spend more on food each month than you owe me...
“There’s also the issue of my condo…”
“Yes, the second mortgage you took out on it.”
I nodded. “I was wondering if we could work out a different payment schedule—”
“Why?” he barked. “Because I didn’t pay this invoice? Let me tell you, missy—”
God, I was so tired of men!
“That’s no way to run a business. You can’t keep your cash flow so precarious.” He tapped on the computer screen. “It looks like you’re behind on your payments.”
“Yes,” I said, picking at my nail polish, hating that I felt like a little girl. “I was hoping we could work something out.”
He grunted. “We’ll have to see. This is a major national corporation, not some Middle-America small-town bank. There are protocols.”
“I understand.”
“Oh, I understand, all right,” I muttered as I walked home. “You’re going to be petty and treat me like a child because you know I can’t do anything about it.”
I let out a loud groan, ignoring the strange looks from the homeless men digging in the trash can. I never should have given my mother that money! I pulled out my phone, my thumb hovering over her number. Should I reach out? No. Nothing good ever came of contacting my mother.
Mrs. Russo, one of the three elderly tenants in my small condo building, was at the mailboxes when I arrived back at my building.
“A good-looking UPS man brought that for you,” she said, gesturing to a large package on the floor. “Talk about big packages!” She giggled. “You should have seen the buns on that man.” Mrs. Russo hovered over me as I inspected the nondescript box. “Anything good? Is it sex toys? I know this gal Ida who started her own sex toy business. That’s one of the reasons I’m moving out to Harrogate, you know.”
“Because of the sex toys?”
“No. I’m gonna work at Ida’s company. She also makes supplements to enhance the female libido.”
“That sounds dangerous,” I said as I wrestled the tape off of the package.
“She gave me some samples. Do you want any?”
“I’m fine.”
“If I had access to the kind of man you had over the other night, I wouldn’t need any special juice to get going either!” She waggled her eyebrows.
“He wasn’t…” I yanked on the tape. “… a boyfriend, he was just—”
“What? A friend with benefits?”
“He’s not my friend,” I grunted as I pried the box open. I really need to start carrying a knife.
“So a hookup then?” Mrs. Russo said knowingly.
“No, he was just—” I opened the box. “A horrible lunatic. What in the world?”
We stared at the box. Inside were pans and pans of frozen lasagna from Cameli’s. It was an absurd amount of lasagna.
“You having a party?”
“No,” I seethed, “I am not having a party, but I am about to be on the news for bludgeoning someone to death with frozen pasta.”
8
Evan
By the time the afternoon rolled around, I was ready to be done. Unfortunately, I had a meeting with the Svenssons. Wishing I could cancel, I texted my sister as I headed outside.
Evan: I’m going to move to Fiji.
Mika: Noo! You have to be the man of honor!
Mika: What kind of brother abandons his own sister?
Evan: I have one more wedding left in me until I turn into a pile of dust. I’m saving it to be the man of honor at your wedding.
Mika: HA! I’m never getting married. I am so done with weddings. I’m already prepping for my future as the neighborhood cat lady.
I smiled as I read her text. I adored my little sister. Honestly, there wasn’t any man good enough for her. Ever since our mom had died when we were younger, I had taken it upon myself to look out for Mika. But did that also include participating in a wedding party against my will?