“I thought you said this wasn’t a date.” His brow furrowed and his hands stilled.
“Well, more of a business transaction.” I let out a heavy breath. “You see, my image has taken a massive hit these past few days, and I need to fix that or I’ll lose everything.”
“Okay,” he said, his tone suspicious. “What does that have to do with me?”
I leaned closer, keeping my voice low even though there weren’t many people in the bistro. “Look, your business is flailing, but your business model is fantastic and you are well-liked, charismatic, and you have a lot of potential. You just lack direction. I can help you with that.”
“And what would you get in return?”
“Someone to help soften my image. Convince people that I’m not a horrible curmudgeon that talks a big game on stage, then knocks his own business in private.”
“But you did those things, right?”
I chuckled. “I did.”
“Then why not just say that? Nobody is ‘on’ one hundred percent of the time. Why should you be held to a different standard? Why not just make it clear that we are who we are, and that your business advice and motivational speeches work whether you’re a little gruff outside of your public persona or not.” He cast his eyes down to the table, lips pursed as he sucked in a breath through his nose, then shook his head. “Just because they pay for your wisdom doesn’t mean they own you.”
His statement hit me like a gut punch. They didn’t own me, I knew that. Logically. But somewhere, somehow, I’d lost sight of that, and my brand became my every waking moment. Suddenly, my inner turmoil made sense. I was burned out, tired of a façade I was forced to wear day and night by my own hand. And when someone had taken away my last safe space, everything came to a head.
But Shelton wasn’t finished with me, and he hadn’t noticed my silence, or if he had, he didn’t know the reason why. “I don’t want to help you lie to the world, and to yourself. And I have more self-respect than that.” He pushed the box away from him. “If this is what you called me here for, you can have this back. I won’t pretend to be your lover.”
“I understand.” I made no move to take the box up from the table.
“Was it even real?”
“What?”
“The other night. You were flirting with me. Or maybe I imagined it.”
“It was real, of course it was. You’re a handsome young man, Shelton.”
“But?”
I hesitated, then, “You’re too young for me. Sure, we would have fun for a little while, but I don’t see this going much further than a good time.”
“Do you think I’m immature?”
“You’re offended.”
“Damn right I am. I’m not a child. I can handle myself and other than almost twenty years of life experience, age doesn’t mean anything.”
I gave him my gentlest smile. He was agitated, hurt by my proposition, and his ego was bruised. It was a bad combination, and I didn’t want his emotions to get the better of him there in the quiet bistro. “Ignoring the age gap isn’t any better than focusing on it. If you think we could be more than just acquaintances, show me. But don’t tell me that a large part of who we are as people won’t affect that. I’ve lived through things you never will because the world is quickly changing. There are things you’ll experience that I won’t simply because your generation was in diapers when I was in college. That’s a huge gap, and I’m not sure we can surmount that. That’s not to say that I think you’re immature at all. I just don’t want you to get your hopes up and end up hurt.”
Shelton scoffed. “That’s funny. My brother said almost the exact thing.”
A soft gasp escaped me before I could stop it. “You talked to your brother about me?”
“I did. He said you were a player, and you would use me and discard me like a broken toy when you got bored.”
I shook my head, licking my lips with just the tip of my tongue, then catching my bottom lip between my teeth. “Preston was never one to hold back what he thought.”
“Is it true?” he challenged.
“It was true. I’m not that man anymore. I don’t have time for games.”
“But you were willing to pretend to date me to get what you wanted.”
“To our mutual benefit. That’s not the same as using you for my own personal gain. I want to help you with your business.”
“My business is doing fine.”
“Your business needs a substantial amount of money invested in startup so it can thrive. A good idea and determination can only get you so far.”
“So, you’re offering to pay me to date you?”
“Did you read the perks of being a consort? When you match up with a patron, they take over providing for you. The Club paid you when you accepted their offer, didn’t they? You should have gotten a gift of some sort, a new wardrobe, and whatever else you need.”
“Ten thousand dollars,” he said, his voice just above a whisper.
“It’s one of the many perks. And if you were to accept me as your patron, then I would take over that responsibility. It’s not buying your presence, it’s upholding the rules of The Club.”
“So they know you’re here, offering me a fake relationship to build our businesses up?”
I flinched. “Not exactly, but that’s not important. You’ve made your position clear.”
I held my finger up to quiet him when the waitress appeared with our check. I handed her a hundred-dollar bill for the sixty-dollar meal. “Keep the change.” She smiled and all but skipped away, her day made by the large tip.
“You can’t buy everyone,” Shelton muttered.
“I’m not trying to buy you. I want to work with you to create something better for both of us.”
“What happens if we fall for each other?”
“I’m not saying that I wouldn’t follow my heart if this became more than what it is right now. We’re grown men. If we want to have a friendship that crosses lines into something more, or if we end up romantically involved…” I trailed off. Nothing that came up in my head sounded better than what Shelton was already accusing me of. He was right to be mad; I hadn’t approached it well, and in his place, I would’ve been offended, too. “Look, you’re right. I could’ve gone about this another way. What if we take things slow, work together on our businesses while we date and if things get romantic, then we’ll reassess things?”
His sour expression faded, but he was still guarded. “Why does this sound like you’re rephrasing the same proposition so you can get the answer you want?”
He smirked and I let out a surprised laugh. “Exactly how many of my videos have you watched, Shelton?”
“All of them.”
“Then you know the bottom line is I want to be with you and work together to build a better life for both of us. As far as foundations go, it’s not a bad start.”
He melted a little, his stiff posture softening as he considered what I was saying. “I’m not going to be put on display and ignored when no one is looking.”