Leaning forward, she knocked on the glass and bit nervously at her lip.
“Yes, ma’am?”
“I’d like to know where we’re going.”
“Oh it’s a surprise, but I’m sure you’ll love it.”
“It’s just I’m afraid Mathew has put a lot of work into something, and I’m going to ruin it.”
Ralph looked nervous as if he were suddenly out of his depth. “I’m sure it’ll be fine.”
“Most women would love whatever he has planned right now. It’s just . . .” she stuttered. “I don’t really like big giant gestures. You see, in my job I get a lot of people who cross my path and think they can win me over with stuff like this. It never works out, and I don’t want this to go bad with Mathew.”
“Um,” Ralph croaked. “I um—”
“Maybe I should get out.”
“We’re here,” Ralph said, trying to force some excitement back into his voice. “I hope you don’t mind heights.”
The spinning propeller of a helicopter could be seen in the distance, and Jessica’s heart sank. Pulling open the limo door, Mathew was dressed in casual clothes and a giant smile. “I hope you like surprises.”
She and Ralph made awkward eye contact before she plastered on a smile and nodded.
“We’ll take a helicopter ride over the city, and then I’ve got this amazing dinner planned. You’ll never accuse me of being boring again.”
“You misinterpreted what I said,” Jessica tried, but the sound of the helicopter overtook her words.
And to his credit the helicopter ride was far from boring. They sat pressed against each other as he pointed out different sights and occasionally squeezed her thigh in excitement.
“There’s dinner,” he said, pointing down to a rooftop lit with twinkling lights and abuzz with people. “We’ll land there and walk over. I found this amazing band to play for us.”
“That sounds . . .” She couldn’t find words that would convey her feelings without hurting his.
“You look sick; was it the helicopter?”
“It’s you,” she said as the engine of the helicopter died down and the blade finally stopped. Her words were too loud now that the background noise was gone.
“What?”
“No, it’s not you. That’s not what I mean. I can’t do all this. I know women love being swept off their feet with these big romantic gestures, but it makes me want to run. Like actually run the hell away right now.”
“Jessica, calm down. I wasn’t trying to seduce you or anything. Don’t freak out. This was just going to be fun.”
“I’m freaking out,” she admitted. “I’m completely freaking out.”
“You’re not making any sense.”
“I want to go.”
Mathew hopped off the helicopter and stared at her as she sat there, not unbuckling.
“You seemed like you were having a good time. We were having fun. What changed?”
“Nothing changed. I guess I should have been clearer with what I meant about you being spontaneous. I get what you’re trying to do here, but—”
“I’m glad one of us gets what’s going on here because I’ll be honest with you: I’m not following what the problem is. Why are you fighting this so hard? Is this still about James and Libby?”
“I don’t know,” she admitted, dropping her head down. “It’s hard to explain. Even if I did, I’m not sure you’d get it. This just isn’t what I want. It’s the opposite of—”
He cut her off abruptly. “Take her back,” he shouted to the pilot. “Just take her back.”
Slamming the heavy metal door, he ducked down and backed away until he was clear of the propeller.
As the helicopter rose higher Mathew grew smaller and smaller, and the pain in her chest radiated. What kind of asshole acted like she just did? The voice in her head answered the question. A terrified one.
When she got back into the limo, Ralph looked sheepish. “Take you home, miss?” he asked, his eyes fixed on the ground.
“No. Take me to a bar. Take me to any bar. I don’t care where.”
“Yes, miss.”
She dialed the phone before she could figure out if Libby would be asleep or awake in her time zone.
“Hello?” The gravelly whisper gave Jessica the answer.
“Is it late there? I’m sorry. But this is bad. It’s really bad.”
“What? Is it my mom?”
“I’m sorry. No. I’m so stupid. She’s fine. God, I’m insensitive. Why didn’t I realize you’d think that? There is something so wrong with me.”
“Slow down. What happened?”
“Mathew took me on a helicopter ride of the city and then wanted me to do dinner on this rooftop with twinkly lights and a band just for us.”
“Oh no,” Libby moaned sincerely.
“Thank you. Thank you for knowing me well enough to realize that is my worst nightmare.”
“But he didn’t know. It sounds like a lovely date, and if you didn’t have your weird hang-ups about how someone wanting to treat you well equals them getting ready to crush you, none of this would be an issue. He did a nice thing for you. A very thoughtful thing.”
“He shouldn’t be doing something like that if he doesn’t know me. There are a thousand things I would have enjoyed. But you know it’s not the big gestures and fairy-tale crap.”
“You are a weird chick, Jessica.” Libby sighed sympathetically. “You need to give him a chance. Even if it’s just you guys hanging out. Stop pushing him away.”
“I just bolted in a helicopter to get away from him. I’m pretty sure that ship has sailed. No coming back from that.”
“Where are you now?”
“I’m getting dropped off at the closest bar.”
“Jess, please don’t do that. You’re alone. It’s not a good idea.”
“I’m not alone; Ralph is with me.”
“Who is Ralph?”
Jessica heard James chime in and then come on the line.
“Give the phone to Ralph,” he ordered, and Jessica obliged.
“James West wants to talk to you,” she said shyly as she handed her phone to Ralph.
“Yes sir,” Ralph said over and over again as he shook his head. “Goodbye sir.”
Ralph hung up the phone and handed it back to her.
“Hey, I wasn’t done talking to Libby.”
“Mr. West said to make sure I took care of you tonight and whatever happens that you leave his tired wife alone until it’s morning there.”
“Jerk,” she hummed in annoyance. “You don’t have to take care of me. I just want to drink. And drink alone.”
“I understand. I’m very good at blending in. You won’t know I’m there.”
“Don’t you have to drive anyone else around?”
“When Mr. West tells me what to do, I do it. Now I know just the bar we should go to. It’s perfect for a broken heart.”
“I don’t have a broken heart,” she bit out quickly. “I just—” She had a million responses but none were honest. She was angry Mathew hadn’t had a chance to understand her better. She’d screwed it up and had been so stupid. She was mad at him and herself. Her heart was broken, even if she wouldn’t say it out loud.