I gave a closed smile. “It would mean a lot to Emma to know you’ve come to this realization, accepting us, knowing I love your daughter more than anything.”
He eyed me for several moments before smirking slightly. “You do love her very much, and how could you not? However, I think you are misunderstanding my intentions. I am not here to give my blessing. It has come to my attention that you have been accepted to flight school.”
“Yes, sir,” I replied, starting to feel a bit more nervous.
“That’s a good opportunity for you,” he replied, eyeing me. “But what it’s not is a good opportunity for my daughter.”
“Sir?”
He chuckled, taking another step toward me. “Did you really think that my daughter would be dating a guy like you, and I wouldn’t make sure I knew every in and out of what was happening? I know about your little plan, the one you two have come up with for tomorrow night. You plan on running off to the west coast in some romantic idea of life together. I have to admit, at your age, that does seem like a real good idea. But I want you to think about a few things.”
I clenched my jaw and lifted my chin, not replying.
He didn’t seem phased by my courage to stand up to him. “Emma is a sweet young girl and doesn’t understand how the world works at all. She thinks she does, but she doesn’t. You’ve been providing for yourself for two years now, and you know how hard it can be to make it work. Emma sees nothing but hearts and romantic gestures, but I promise you, the first time she gets a view of a one-room apartment with dirty paint, no closets, and questionable neighbors, the hearts will deflate.”
I opened my mouth to battle back, but he put up his hand, shaking his head. “Don’t get me wrong, Gabriel. I know you have the best intentions, and all that feels right is to be together, but you have to be the voice of reason here for Emma. She is used to a lifestyle I have provided her. She is used to the best opportunities, the best living arrangements, education, support, clothes, food, you name it. And while you can both say you don’t care about any of that, she has no real idea what that means. How do you plan to provide for Emma? Going to school, working a night job bussing tables? Life is expensive.”
“Emma and I make choices together. I don’t make choices for her.”
Mr. Harrison chuckled. “That’s a boy’s answer, son. Unfortunately, in your situation, you have to make the tough choices. If you leave with her tomorrow, I will cut her off. None of her credit cards will work, no bank account. You will be responsible for her happiness. On the other hand, she stays here, and she can go to an amazing college, have her friends, her life, security with money and food. Her family will be here with her. She may have a broken heart, but those things heal.”
“She would hate me,” I whispered.
“Probably,” Mr. Harrison replied. “But you would know that when you said you loved her, you really meant it. You did what was best for her.”
He stepped back and straightened his suit jacket. “The choice is yours, Gabriel. Think about what is best for her and what you can provide her. Don’t ruin her future because you don’t want to let her go.”
I swallowed hard, crossing my arms over my chest as he turned and walked to the car waiting for him. I watched him drive away, swallowing down the inevitable crisis brewing in my mind. The rest of the night was nothing but a storm in my brain, a push and pull of my heart and my head. I never thought, for even a second, that Mr. Harrison would be able to get into my mind like that, but he did. He did, and I was sadly beginning to think he was right.
When I got home from work, I sat down and wrote letter after letter, tearing them up and throwing them away. I wanted Emma to have the best in life, to be given every opportunity, and no matter how hard I tried to justify it, I wasn’t sure when or if I’d ever be able to do that for her. It wouldn’t be for years that I really made decent money, and as a commercial pilot, I’d never be a millionaire. I’d never give her mansions and couture. I knew she said she didn’t care about those things, but all of the luxuries she was provided by her father were things she deserved, because she was that amazing.
Finally, when the sun was starting to come up, I finished the letter I didn’t want to write. It was mean, and I didn’t mean a word of it. It was necessary, though. If I didn’t say the things I wrote, she would never believe it. She would come looking for me, and I couldn’t have that happen. So, afraid that I would change my mind, I folded the letter and sealed it in an envelope, knowing the next twelve hours were going to be miserable for me. Luckily, I didn’t have a ticket for graduation, and we thought it best that I not come to the party at her parent’s house. Instead, we were meeting that night at the park in the West Loop of Chicago. We hung out there a lot when we didn’t want to end the night but had nowhere else to go.
Throughout the day, Emma texted me. We texted all the time, but I had to keep my texts short with her that day. Not only for her, but for me as well. I knew if I got too emotional, I wouldn’t leave the letter for her.
I’m getting ready to walk in graduation. Miss you. Xoxoxo
I sighed, texting her back. Enjoy, and try not to fall asleep during the speeches.
Some time went by, and I received more and more texts.
This party is so boring. I’m so ready for tonight. I can’t wait for us to just be us. Like we always talked about. To have freedom.
My heart was breaking with every text I sent. I promise, no matter what, you will have your freedom tonight. You’ll have everything you need or want.
After that text, I put my phone in my pocket, turning the ringer off. Half an hour before our meetup at eleven-thirty, I made sure everything was packed in the car and headed over to the park, setting the envelope at our meeting spot. I stood there for several minutes just staring at it, finally pulling myself away. Echoes of her father’s words played over and over again in my head. In reality, I could have left right then and there, but I couldn’t. If I was going to break her heart, I wasn’t going to be a coward and head off, leaving her to the misery alone. So, I found an out of the way spot to park in the dark and sat, waiting for her to arrive.
The moon glowed full in the sky, even through the haze and light of the city. I watched as she hopped out of her cab, bag on her shoulder, wearing that beautiful blue sundress I loved on her so much. She looked around and headed over to the meeting spot, putting her bag down as she slowly picked up the envelope. It took everything in me not to get out and go running for her. To tell her not to read it. To put her in the car and head off into the sunset.
She opened the letter and read it. As she did, I whispered every word, having memorized it as I wrote it.
“Emma,
I know I should have had this conversation with you in person, but I just couldn’t. I couldn’t deal with the tears and inevitable begging that would probably ensue. I won’t be here tonight, and by morning, I’ll be far away. I decided, after long thoughts, the best thing to do here is not prolong the inevitable. You and me, we are from different worlds. No matter how sweet you are, you will never understand reality as it is for people like me. You’ll end up wanting and wanting things I won’t be able to give you. We’ll fight through the nagging. Then we’ll break up. That’s just the reality of it all. You belong with your rich family, in your rich dresses, with your rich innocence. I don’t. We couldn’t be more mismatched if we did it intentionally. I am off to a new life where I can spread my wings, meet people, become a pilot.”