“It’s okay. You didn’t offend me, and it’s not a big deal. Just something that has been, and always will be.” I shrug. I’m not lying. Sure, I’d love to have a big loving family, but I accepted long ago that’s not how my life’s going to play out. I have me, and I’m okay with that.
“So, how did the two of you meet?” Jade asks. There’s a sparkle in her eyes that tells me she already knows.
“Rushton,” I say, glancing over at Alyssa.
“Rush?” Ramsey asks.
“Yeah. I was at Gunderson’s hardware, trying to reach the fishing line from the top shelf. He came up on me, needing the same thing, and helped me out.”
“That’s not all. She had a flat, and Rush changed it for her. He told her to come to the shop to have it fixed. She came in a couple of weeks ago, and we exchanged numbers.”
All of the ladies seem to share a look. One that I don’t quite understand. I start to ask them, but a large guy I’ve never seen before leans over and kisses Alyssa from upside down.
When he stands, he smiles at her as if she’s his entire universe. “Just got here. Wanted to let you know I was here. Love you.” He kisses her again, waves to the group, and heads to a table in the back corner. I want to turn to watch him leave, but I think better of it.
“That’s Sterling, my fiancé.” Alyssa holds up her hand, flashing her engagement ring.
“I thought this was girls’ night?” I ask the table.
“It is, but we’re married to protective men. We drink and laugh and eat all the greasy bar food we want, and then when we’re ready to go, they make sure that we get home safe.”
“They do this every time?” I ask them. “Do they get mad when you drink?”
“No. Not at all,” Ramsey tells me. “They’re here to make sure we have our fun but get home safely. It’s the best of both worlds, really. We get to let loose knowing that we have someone here who’s going to look out for us. All of our guys come, and usually, a few, if not all, of the remaining single brothers end up showing up as well. We basically have guys' night and girls’ night at the same time and at the same place.”
“Wow. I’m not really sure what to say about that. My ex would have flipped his lid if I had gone out drinking with friends. Now that I think about it, it’s probably because he was sleeping with my best friend—excuse me, ex-best friend—behind my back.” There’s zero emotion in my voice. That’s something else I learned to do. Keep my emotions in check. Never let them see what their actions do to you.
The table erupts with outrage on my behalf. The ladies are not worried about how loud they’re being. They’re firing off insults to my ex left and right, and I hide my smile behind my beer. As I lower my glass, I’m about to tell them I’m over it, and I am. I’ve written them off, and I moved on. However, before I get the chance, the table is surrounded by very large, very handsome men with concerned looks on their faces.
“What happened?” The one who is standing behind Jade with his hands on her shoulder leans over to make eye contact with her. “Is it the baby?”
Jade turns to face him, offers him a smile, and pats his cheek. “Everything is fine. The baby is fine. We were just reacting to some news that Crosby told us.”
“Crosby?” His brow furrows.
“Hi.” I wave. “I’m Crosby.”
“Nice to meet you.” He nods.
“Boys,” Palmer speaks up. “Meet Crosby. Crosby, I’m going to point them out, but we don’t expect you to remember them all. This one is Orrin, married to Jade. Beside him is Heath. He’s not a Kincaid, but he is Piper’s baby daddy. His brother owns this fine establishment. Deacon”—she points to another man—“also, not a Kincaid, but married to Ramsey. My husband, Brooks.” She places her hand on her shoulder over his. “You’ve met Declan and Rushton.” I nod as I try to keep up. “Then we have Ryder, Archer, Maverick, and Merrick, the twins. You’re in luck that the gang’s all here tonight.”
I feel a body step in close behind me, and I turn to see Rushton standing there. His eyes immediately lock on mine. “I didn’t know you’d be here,” he says in greeting.
“Was I supposed to tell you?” I counter.
“She’s been here a while, Rush. You could have come and said hi,” Ramsey tells him.
He swallows hard. “Are you drinking?”
I hold up my almost empty glass of beer. “Yep,” I say, tossing the rest of it back.
“How are you getting home?”
“We’ve got her covered,” Jade speaks up.
Rushton’s eyes never leave mine. “I’ve got her covered,” he tells his sister-in-law.
“No can do, brother,” she replies. “The arrangements have already been made. That is unless Crosby says it’s okay.”
I look away from Rushton, which is harder than it should be, and find Jade’s gaze across the table. She gives me a sly grin, and I nod. I know what she’s doing. She’s giving me a choice that I wasn’t sure I even had until she spoke up. I can choose to let Rushton take me home like he’s demanding, or she and her husband will happily take me home as well. The choice is in my hands, and for someone who didn’t get to choose until she turned eighteen, I appreciate that. These days, I don’t allow myself to put my trust in someone else to let them make decisions for me.
“We’ll see.” That’s the only reply I can come up with. On the one hand, I want to spend time with Rushton. I don’t know that there’s a single woman on the planet who wouldn’t want time with him. On the other hand, I know that he’s too much. The risk is too high to let myself get close to him. And I know that I will fall. The risk is far too great to my heart. I don’t let people in, but with Rushton, there’s this pull I’ve never in my life felt before. I’m usually a trust-your-gut kind of girl, but what happens when you don’t recognize what your gut is telling you?
I feel his hands on my shoulders and his hot breath next to my ear. I shiver as he speaks the words. “Let it be me, Crosby. Let me take care of you.”
Six words that I’ve longed to hear, and they come from a man I barely know. It’s not that I need someone to take care of me. I’m an adult and am very capable. I’ve been proving that over and over since I turned eighteen and was released from the foster care system. That doesn’t mean I don’t think about what it would be like to have someone in my life to lean on. To carry some of the burdens.
“It’s girls’ night,” Alyssa speaks up from her place beside me. “You guys are cramping our style.”
Her fiancé whispers something that makes her laugh. He gives her a quick kiss on the lips and urges the others to leave us be. It’s not until they all walk away that I realize I’ve been holding my breath when I pull a heavy inhale into my lungs.
“Damn.” Palmer’s eyes are wide as she pretends to fan her face with her hands.
“I thought you said you and Rush just met?” Kennedy asks.
“We did.”
“That”—Ramsey points to where Rushton was just standing behind me—“did not seem like just meeting.”