Okay, it’s still kind of sweet.
North also shoots Atlas a look as I answer him. “If anyone tries to ask questions, we both know you’ll be able to spin a story here. That’s kind of what you do, right?”
I’m mostly giving him shit just to get a smile out of him or Nox, and the smirk that the younger Draven brother sends me has my heart skipping a beat in my chest. Being in on his twisted and dark jokes is my new favorite position to be in. It’s a good distraction from the twisting pile of nerves that my stomach is in at the mere thought of Gryphon’s father, the General, finding out about this before we’ve even had the chance to speak with Gryphon himself.
That situation is pretty far up the ‘no, thank you’ list.
We convince the god-bond to play along with us, but only if I agree to stay at his side the entire time. Gabe is happy enough to trust my decision, thank god, because Atlas and North both hate that. Nox agrees to stay with the two of us as a buffer and, begrudgingly because he hates this idea all the way to hell, Atlas does as well. He’s poised to dive in front of me the moment things might take a turn for the worse.
I do my best to direct him out of the building and into one of the ATVs while North does exactly what I’d teased him about and runs interference like his life depends on it.
Being a pariah in the community really does have its advantages. No one attempts to get close to us, not even Gryphon’s own TacTeam operatives who look stricken at the sight of the bandage across his eyes.
It’s a tense fifteen minutes getting Gryphon into the ATV and back to the house, but we make it without anyone noticing.
Or Atlas killing the god-bond.
There is a deep sense of relief that settles over my soul as I step into our house once again. I don't want to think about it too much, but there was a moment while we were fighting that it had crossed my mind that maybe we weren't ever going to get back here. A moment when the Resistance had just kept coming, more and more bodies piling up around us, where it had felt inevitable that we would be stuck fighting for our lives and our community forever. A moment where I had thought that maybe I wouldn't ever be kicking my shoes off in this front foyer again, lining them up carefully alongside my Bonded’s and smelling the fresh paint of the building around us as Gabe slowly finishes it off.
I don't want to admit this to any of them, though.
The problem is that my Bonded Group doesn’t need to be able to read my mind in the way that Gryphon's god-bond can to know what I'm thinking.
Gabe slings an arm around my shoulders, pulling my body in close to his as he presses a kiss to the top of my head.
“I’m just as happy to be home as you are,” he murmurs quietly, and I clear my throat a little as I nod back.
Relief.
That's all I'm feeling right now.
The surprise of Senator Oldham’s void eyes and Gryphon’s god-bond waking up has distracted me a little from what we’d actually done in the Wasteland, of how many people I had torn the souls out of, taking their power and funneling it through to my Bonded. It's only now that the job is over, that I'm stuck facing the consequences of what my Gift has done.
Physically, I'm tired, having given most of the power away. But mentally, I now have to compartmentalize everything that I’d done back there so that I don’t spiral into a pit of self-loathing.
It’s a well-worn path and so easy for me to do.
I squeeze Gabe for a second longer before I duck into Atlas’ arms for a quick hug there as well, wanting to check in with each of them in at least a small way before I lose myself. They all seem to know that without much said, thank God.
As I step into the kitchen area, I find the small piles of clutter still where we'd left them, as though life here had simply been put on pause while we were camping out in Alaska and fighting for our lives. As much of a neat freak as North is, his own bedroom and wardrobes both at the Draven manor and here in the Sanctuary immaculately kept, there's no stopping the small piles of life that accumulate. It’s proof that there’s six people living in this house, all of them with their own varying degrees of cleanliness and clutter.
I can't help but sigh once more as I stare out at it all, just a small happy sound at the space that we've all built together. North carefully steps in front of me, framing my face with both of his hands as he pulls me in for a gentle but firm kiss, pressing our foreheads together as he pulls away.
He murmurs quietly to me, “Go take a shower, Bonded, and get yourself cleaned up. Take a breath, get yourself feeling human once more. Then we’ll deal with this.”
He doesn't say what exactly this is, but both of us turn our heads to stare at Gryphon’s bond regardless. It's standing by the table staring right back at us both, its eyes cold and calculating as it watches our every move.
I feel the same draw to it that I’ve always felt to my Bonds, but this time, my head can't let go of the fact that it might be plotting the death of my Bonded.
I love the god-bond. My bond also loves it.
But I love Gryphon more.
North kisses me one last time before he pulls away again. “Shower, Bonded. If it hasn't made a move yet, I'm sure it’ll wait until we're all clean.”
I take two steps towards my bedroom only for Gryphon’s god-bond to take a step towards me, as though there’s an invisible thread connecting us, and he can’t be more than a step away from me at any time. He’s only halted by Nox planting himself between the two of us, his shadows still playing happily at his feet in a show of relaxation that doesn't quite meet their maker's stern facade.
“She's going to go get cleaned up, and you're going to wait here,” he says firmly. When the god-bond’s eyes shift away from me to stare him down, North flicks a hand subtly in my direction to get me moving. He steps up to his brother's side as they both prepare to face the god-bond and find me a little alone time.
I love them both now more than ever.
I scurry away without another word, trusting them both to deal with this situation for me. I glance over my shoulder one last time at the god-bond wearing my Bonded’s face so blankly and try not to puke at the clenching in my gut at the sight of him.
No one attempts to follow me.
I don’t know if North knows in that way of his that I really do need a minute to myself or if he just needs the others out there as backup, but as I slip into the bathroom and peel away the filthy Tac gear from my body, I’m relieved.
While I wait for the hot water to kick in, I take stock of myself in the mirror for a moment, getting an eyeful of the mess I'm in after the ferocity of the fighting. North fussing over me wasn't anything out of the norm, especially after that shield had come up around me and Davies to keep him from me, but looking at myself now, I'm surprised at his restraint.
Underneath the filth of the fight, my hair is so white that it's almost transparent, what little color had been in it has leached completely away. I doubt it could get any lighter than this, though I suppose I felt that way the last time I had used my Gift. It still found a way to get lighter. My eyes look sunken in my skull. My skin is dry and dull and bruised, and every bit of the exhaustion that I'm feeling is etched into the lines and bruises on my skin.
I let my eyes drift down slowly and find an array of scratches and small marks littering my arms and legs, along with the bruising from Davies' attack. My Bonded might all look perfect, thanks to the power boost I had given them, but I already know a trip to see Felix is in my future. There's no way any of them will stand for me healing the slow and normal way once they get a look at the small smattering of damage I've taken.