“I got the time and the ability,” Holden replied.
“Really?”
“Yeah, I did a lot of carpentry work when I was younger—got some on-the-job training and I caught on fast. It comes automatically to me. Haven’t done much of it in years, but I could do it. I need the tools, though.”
“I can get you the tools. We’ll steal them from my daddy,” Roe replied.
“Not often I hear that moniker about a real father.”
Roe felt his cheeks heat. “Point taken. But you know how it is in places like this.” He went to a box, grabbed some old gloves out, tossed a pair to Holden, and kept some for himself. “Should we start by tearing shit up?” Roe waggled his eyebrows playfully.
“Is there a better way?” Holden grinned.
He had a couple of sledgehammers in there, so he got them and passed one over. “Let’s do this.”
“You don’t have to ask me twice.”
They goggled up and started swinging.
They worked through most of the morning, only stopping for some water or a piss break. Marilee came out at one point and brought them lemonade. She was off that day, and she and Sean were going to have some mother-son time.
Roe enjoyed working side by side with Holden. They kept busy, sometimes chatting, others just concentrating on what they were doing.
Around one, Roe said, “I don’t know about you, but if I don’t eat, I’m not sure I’ll survive.”
Holden laughed, pulling off his goggles and gloves. “I could definitely handle some food.”
“Wanna come over to the house with me?”
“You don’t really have to feed me. We have stuff in the cabin.”
“I want to,” Roe replied.
“Okay.”
They walked out of the barn. Roe tugged his T-shirt over his head and wiped the sweat off his face. When he glanced over at Holden, he noticed the other man watching him. Holden quickly turned away before doing the same thing with his own T-shirt. Roe would be lying if he said he didn’t appreciate the view. Just because Holden had a boyfriend didn’t mean Roe couldn’t think he was sexy.
“We can do sandwiches if that works for you. And I have leftover potato salad from Mama’s.”
Holden chuckled as Roe led him through the back door, which was off the kitchen.
“What’s so funny?”
“I’m afraid if I say, it’ll offend you, when I don’t mean to.”
“I have tough skin. It takes a lot to get to me.” Roe went to the sink and began washing his hands.
“I was just thinking that your family and this town remind me of one of those movies on TV. Just seems like everything is perfect.”
Roe scooted over so Holden could wash up too. “Nah, everything’s not perfect.”
“I was gonna say that,” Holden added. “In my experience, it never really is.”
Roe was curious what that meant but didn’t want to be pushy by asking. “Roast beef, ham, or turkey?”
“Roast beef. I’ll help.”
Roe got the supplies out, and they made their lunch together, then scooped massive helpings of potato salad on their paper plates.
“Sweet tea, water, or beer?” Roe asked as Holden set his plate on the kitchen table, then browsed around. The living room, dining room, and kitchen were all open concept.
“Sweet tea.”
“You are a Southern boy, I see.”
Holden didn’t answer, just walked over to the photos on the wall in the living room. “You really are close to Wyatt’s mom.” It was a photo of Roe, Lindsey, and their son, taken outside, at his family’s farm.
“I am. Known her since I was…hell, six or seven. She was the first person I told I’m gay.”
When Roe set the drinks down, Holden made his way back over. “She take it well from the start?”
“Yeah.”
“That was Marilee for me.”
Roe nodded and took a bite of his food. Once he swallowed, he said, “Linds is like a sister to me.”
“Only you share a son.”
“We do. I always knew I wanted kids. I was in my early thirties, her too. She hadn’t ever really been serious about anyone. It made sense to us at the time, though now I look back and wonder what in the hell we were thinking. But then, Wyatt is the most important person in my life, so I’m thankful for that decision even if it did turn out a little more convoluted than we wanted to think it would be.”
Holden bit into his sandwich, and Roe found himself continuing. “It’s hard sometimes, being in a small town. Everyone knows us, knows our business. There are rumors and gossip. Half the town doesn’t want to believe I’m really gay, and they’re waiting for me to do my duty and make her my wife.”
“She waiting for that?” Holden asked, and Roe’s back immediately stiffened. “Shit. I’m sorry. I had no right to ask that. It’s not my business, and I don’t even know Lindsey. That wasn’t fair to her.”
“You’re not the first to ask, but we’re not… She knows I’m gay. She’s always known I’m gay. We’ve never…outside of having Wyatt. We decided we’d give it one shot. If she got pregnant, it was meant to be. If not, it wasn’t. She kept track of her cycle, and clearly I have strong swimmers.” Roe winked. “It was awkward for both of us, but I think because we’re so close, that made it okay. We never really talked about it afterward. When it comes to her relationship status, Linds doesn’t accept less than she deserves and, well, it’s probably not the easiest on her—living here, knowing everyone in town, having a kid with me. Makes me feel guilty a lot, like I hold her back, being so close to me. People are strange, and there’s still a lot of backward thinking out there. She’s forty-four, never been married, has a son with me. Fuck.” He rubbed a hand over his face. While he knew having Wyatt was the best decision they could have made, it was these small nuances they hadn’t considered.
“It’s not your fault,” Holden said. “She knew what she was doing just as much as you did. From where I’m sitting, you’re both happy, raising your son, and you’ve both made sacrifices.”
“Yeah.” He nodded. He guessed so. “Poor thing. Every Sunday at church they ask her where I am. Not Mama or…Dad,” Roe said pointedly, “but Lindsey. They treat her like she’s my wife.”
“Gotta admit, I thought the same. The two of you together…”
“I love her, but I could never be in love with her.” Roe was done talking about his life for now. Hell, he was surprised at how much detail he’d gone into already. “What about you? How long have you and…”
“Vince,” Holden said between bites. “A little over a year.”
Jealousy stabbed through his chest. Roe had always wanted that. He’d thought he’d had it for a while. “Wow…serious, then.”
“Nah, not really. We kinda do our own thing.”
“Open?” Roe asked. While open relationships weren’t for him, he knew a lot of people, especially when he’d been in DC, for whom those relationships had been exactly what both parties wanted.