“What?” Dez asked.
“I just... I’m not sure how what I’m supposed to do won’t actually kill him.”
“I’m going to need details, Trinity,” Nicolai said.
I rubbed my palms over my knees. “The Throne said that my grace would never harm someone I cared about. That I needed to use it to strike at a heart encased in chaos.”
“The Sword of Michael.” Nicolai’s brows rose. “I’m guessing that means you’re supposed to stab him in the heart with the Sword of Michael.”
“Pretty much.”
“How will that not kill him?” Danika’s eyes went wide.
“That’s what I’m wondering, but the Throne was all like, ‘You got to have faith,’” I told them.
“I can’t imagine the Throne lied to you,” Gideon said.
“Really?” came Dez’s response. “Angels don’t often outright lie, but they sure as Hell leave a whole lot of truth out.”
“Thrones are different, though. They are the speakers of truths and seers of lies,” Gideon argued, and I thought of all those creepy eyes. “If the Throne told her this, then it has to be true.”
“True or not, I have to do it.” My hands stilled. “Zayne’s out there right now, and I have no idea what he’s doing. Hopefully he’s napping or eating unhealthy food. That’s probably not the case, and the Throne...he warned that it could already be too late. That all those things he felt when he Fell, what he’s feeling now, could’ve already...infected him.”
Danika turned her head away, and I knew she, like me, couldn’t bear the thought of that.
I took a shaky breath. “If I don’t try to bring him back and take that risk, he will become evil. He’s going to do things that Zayne would never do.”
“He already has, by the looks of it,” Nicolai said softly, staring at me, and I knew what he saw. New bruises.
The truth in that burned. “I can’t let him turn into a monster. I won’t do that to him. I won’t let that happen to him. I can’t.”
“Agreed,” Dez said without a second of hesitation.
“Then what’s the game plan?” Nicolai placed his hands on the desk. “What happens next?”
Shower? There was dirt and mud on me. And blood. I doubted that was what Nicolai meant. I also doubted there was time for that. “I’ll head out there and look for Zayne. He found me once and I guess he’ll find me again. The Throne made it sound like he would be drawn to my grace. Then I will...I will bring him back.”
“Okay, then.” He turned to Dez. “Let’s roll out.”
It took me a moment to realize what that meant. “You guys can’t go out there looking for him. I told you that he’s back so you all stay away from him.”
Nicolai faced me. “We are in this with you. You head out there to find Zayne, we’ll be there with you.”
“Thanks, but I don’t think that’s wise. He’s very—”
“Confused. Possibly even dangerous to us. Yes, I know. We all know, which is why you shouldn’t be out there on your own.”
“You’re a Trueborn,” Gideon said. “That’s pretty cool. And it’s also something I should’ve figured out, especially Zayne being your Protector. You’re strong and deadly in your own right, but he’s a fallen angel, Trinity. He may not be fully Fallen, as in the sense that he’s completely lost to us, but you’re going up against a very powerful class of angel that may not be able to stop himself from doing some major damage. You can’t do this alone, and I doubt he’s just going to allow you to walk right up to him and stab him. You’re going to need us to distract him.”
I tensed, humbled by their willingness to not stand by and also downright terrified. “Look, I appreciate the offer, but I didn’t come here to ask for help—”
“I know. We all know that,” Nicolai stated. “You came here to warn us off, and I appreciate the sentiment, but I’m not offering our help. You’re getting it.”
A knot formed in my chest as I tipped forward. “And what will happen if Zayne takes one of you out?”
“That is a risk we would take,” Nicolai answered.
“Gladly,” Dez tossed out, and when I looked over to him, I saw Gideon nod. “We would gladly risk our lives to help bring him back.”
“That’s great to hear. All of you are amazing. Really. But what if that does happen? And I succeed in bringing him back?” I asked, scanning the room. “What do you think that’ll do to Zayne?”
Everyone in the room fell quiet.
“He’s going to have to deal with enough crap as it is.” I hoped said crap was minimal and limited to throwing me around, but knowing him, that would cut him deep. “We don’t want to add to that.”
“You’re right,” came Danika’s voice. “We don’t want to add to that, but we also aren’t going to stand back and do nothing.” She came forward, sitting beside me. “I think I know Zayne pretty well,” she said, and that was true. They were friends, and at one point they could’ve become more. That was what Zayne’s father had wanted. “If this was happening to any Warden, he wouldn’t sit it out. You know that. He’d be right there, making damn sure that he came home and that he didn’t add to the mess the other was in, and so would any of us.”
“But you can’t guarantee that. I can’t even guarantee that,” I argued.
“And you can’t guarantee that this will even work,” she countered. “That Zayne will even survive this.”
Cold air filled my chest. “You’re right. You all want to be there for that?”
“No,” Nicolai answered. “We want to be there for you if this doesn’t work.”
5
There was no convincing Nicolai or the others that the smart and sane thing was to stay home. It wasn’t like the city would descend into chaos if they did. Ever since the Harbinger had showed up, demon activity had gone way down. They could spend the next couple of days watching Netflix. There was some really interesting crap on that streaming service, according to Cayman, the demon who was sort of like middle management in the demonic world. When I left the apartment earlier that evening, he had passed out watching some kind of documentary about a guy with a mullet, big cats and murder.
But the Wardens weren’t about that kind of life.
So after taking a moment to wash the blood off my chin and below my ears, I found myself walking aimlessly through Rock Creek Park with Dez at my side and several other Wardens nearby. Gideon had hung back at the compound, wiring into the police dispatch just in case any calls came in that would possibly give us a lead on Zayne’s whereabouts. Nicolai was out here somewhere, but he’d left after Dez and I to “talk” things over with Danika. She wanted to help. Nicolai was dead set against that. I had no idea who won that battle, but I was betting on Danika.