“I don’t think coming here was such a good idea.” Koda tried climbing from the bed and almost fell.
In a flash, he found himself on his back. Felix settled between Koda’s thighs. Even though Felix was on top, Koda didn’t feel pinned. “Please don’t go.”
Koda’s heart rate immediately slowed at Felix’s quiet plea. He sounded genuinely hurt at the idea of Koda leaving.
“Okay.”
Felix’s lips lightly brushed Koda’s. “Just stay.” Felix punctuated the quietly spoken words with another light kiss. “I want you here.” Felix sucked Koda’s bottom lip. Every thought of leaving melted away. There was nowhere he would rather be right now. As Felix deepened their kiss, Koda forgot why he had been upset in the first place. This was all he wanted in the world. Koda might never move again.
No matter how hard Felix fought against his nature, he always lost. He was needy. Felix preferred being part of a pair. Single life wasn’t for him. He had loved being a husband, even when things had first turned bad. Until the moment Megan cheated, he hadn’t imagined getting divorced. So he could argue he wouldn’t beg anyone to leave him, but—obviously—that wasn’t true. He had chosen Koda. Now, he couldn’t let him go. He would beg and chase. Koda was his now.
Felix poured all those feelings into their kiss. Truthfully, he was so upset at the idea of Koda leaving that it took a minute before his brain switched gears. It took Koda shoving his hand between their bodies and unbuttoning Felix’s jeans before the lust took over.
Felix pulled away long enough to steal Koda’s shirt. Then he was back, owning Koda’s mouth. Their tongues stroked like they were desperate to touch. Felix couldn’t stop moving against Koda, fucking him with their pants on. He couldn’t get enough of the way their bare torsos felt against each other. He craved Koda. For months, he had been watching Koda, wanting him. Now he had Koda beneath him. It felt like a blessing. Still, he didn’t want to take advantage.
“I can stop,” Felix said as he moved to kissing Koda’s neck. “I didn’t plan this.”
Koda slapped his hand against the headboard and moaned. Until that moment, Felix hadn’t realized how aggressively he had been humping Koda. He didn’t stop. Koda visibly strained toward release. Felix couldn’t focus on anything else. Koda was shameless. It was obvious he was about to come in his expensive black pants, and Koda raced toward that fate. Felix couldn’t tear his gaze away from the sight. He needed to watch. A loud cry tore from Koda. Felix lost his breath. Emotion washed over him. It was as if a million realizations hit at once. There was no one better than Koda. Felix would plead to stay with him. They had known each other for years. Since Koda was seventeen, to be exact, which should be weird, but it wasn’t. Felix had watched him grow into the confident man beneath him. Maybe he hadn’t noticed Koda until recently, but he saw Koda now. Felix would protect him with his life.
With his cock still begging for his turn at release, Felix softly kissed Koda’s throat and rolled away. He headed for the bathroom. After finding a washcloth, he wet it with warm water and headed back to bed. Every step was almost painful in his lust. Before he reached Koda to clean him up, Koda rolled from the bed and stripped out of his pants and underwear. Felix stood frozen halfway to the bed. Koda was perfect. It was possible Felix saw him through his feelings and that made Koda ten times hotter, but Felix doubted that was the case. Another thought hit, rocking Felix on his heels. Koda couldn’t see himself, and he couldn’t see Felix. Yet he chose to be here. Felix’s throat swelled. He wasn’t worthy.
“Come here.”
At Koda’s demand, Felix forced himself out of his head. “I got you a washcloth.”
Koda looked sexy and ready for more. His intensity had Felix’s mouth going dry. “Set it aside. I don’t need it yet.”
A stuttered breath escaped Felix. He set the washcloth on the nightstand and closed the distance between them. The moment he was within striking distance, Koda snagged the waistband of Felix’s jeans and underwear and shoved. Felix did his best to help Koda strip him, but Koda was in charge. Once he was nude, and before Felix could figure out Koda’s next move, Koda was on his knees. Felix’s dick was in Koda’s mouth. Felix searched for anything to cling to, hoping to stay upright. There was nothing. He buried his fingers in Koda’s hair instead. Then Koda swallowed him.
“Oh god.” The words tore from Felix’s throat as Koda’s throat tightened around him. Even though Felix was completely incapable of thinking about anyone else, he knew he had never had a blow job this good. He was about to embarrass himself. There was no way he would last long. The pressure built. Sounds tore from Felix’s throat he couldn’t control. He tugged and pulled at Koda’s hair, fucking Koda’s mouth. Koda used both hands and his tongue to drive Felix mad. Every muscle in Felix’s body tightened in anticipation. He felt the first spasm build. Koda tightened his fist around Felix’s cock so hard that he stopped Felix from coming. A whimper escaped Felix.
Koda shot to his feet, denying Felix the orgasm he needed. “Get on the bed.”
Felix scrambled to obey. He wanted to come. The moment he settled onto his back, Koda was there, between Felix’s thighs and sucking him. The threat of orgasm was back. Felix’s eyes burned as he fought not to blink against the sight of Koda bobbing on his dick. He dug his heels into the mattress and pushed against Koda’s mouth. Felix wanted everything from Koda. This time, when the first spasm hit, Koda didn’t stop him. When he blew, it felt like the orgasm he lost hit with this one, pulling multiple orgasms from him at once. That had never happened to Felix. His body shook and his moans bounced from the walls. Koda kept sucking, taking everything Felix could give him. Felix felt like he lost a part of himself. Despite the pleasure pulling at his eyelids, Felix still couldn’t look away from Koda. He had never felt so free to watch every nuance of getting pleasured. The sight seared into his brain. Felix knew he would never touch himself again without seeing Koda on his cock.
Before Felix caught his breath, Koda rolled away and was on his feet. He had his cane and searched the room. Felix gasped for air, watching as Koda found the sink and washed his face. It was as if nothing happened between them. There were no kisses or whispered promises. Koda was done.
“We should find a place for dinner.”
As Koda’s words sank in, so too did his expression. He had closed his heart against Felix. Koda had wrapped himself in a protective coating so thick and fast that Felix could practically see his walls as a tangible thing. It hit Felix. No one cuddled Koda. They didn’t stay and hold him. He didn’t get aftercare or sweet kisses. People fucked him and left. Felix was in his feelings and couldn’t take it.
“We will in a little while. First, come here.”
Koda crossed the room. Felix sat up, set Koda’s cane aside, and dragged Koda back onto the bed. He wrapped himself around Koda, hoping to break through the wall Koda erected. Koda wrapped his hands around the arm Felix draped over him, as if he didn’t know where else to put his hands. Felix kissed Koda’s ear and then his cheek, luring him in. Koda drew a ragged-sounding breath and turned his face Felix’s way. Triumph rang through Felix’s mind as their tongues met. He found himself back between Koda’s thighs, but this time, it had nothing to do with sex. Felix just needed to be as close as he could get to Koda. Their nude bodies molded. Felix’s heartbeat kissed Koda’s chest, as if trying to touch Koda’s heart. He held Koda as close as he could and settled in. They weren’t going anywhere. Felix would make Koda feel him. There was more to them than desire. Felix wouldn’t stop until Koda saw it too. Koda didn’t need to protect his heart. Felix was here to steal it, and he would keep it safe. This was the start of something real.