They were solid as a rock, and maybe that was why I’d stayed. Maybe them still being together built hope in me that I hadn’t even realized was there.
“I’m…” I cleared my throat as the words got stuck, gaining both of their attention. Mom moved some of her dark-brown hair that was cut in line with her chin from her face as she gave me her attention. “I’m gonna go and unpack.”
“Okay.” Mom smiled, the simple gesture saying so much more than any of her words could. It told me she was sorry, but also glad she was here. It told me that she knew what she’d put me through and that she was trying harder to not do it anymore. It was an unspoken apology, one that I wouldn’t fully acknowledge, because I was afraid that if I did, I wouldn’t be able to continue on the path I was trying to create so that I became nothing like them.
I loved my parents, but I had to be the complete opposite of them. I couldn’t let myself fall down that rabbit hole, which was why I still hadn’t attended any kind of party. The kids in my senior class were always trying to get me to come to the latest blowout, but I always refused, knowing that if the temptation was there, I had the kind of genes that I wasn’t sure would be able to stop me.
Addiction was a disease, one that I’d researched and found evidence that it ran in families. Which meant I had to be extra careful.
“Want me to help you?” Dad asked, moving away from Mom, but it was too late because I’d already picked up the lone box of things I had. It wasn’t much, but what was in here was mine. I’d already taken up a trash bag full of clothes to my room.
“I got it,” I told him, trying not to sound too harsh. I’d done everything for myself for as long as I could remember. I didn’t want to rely on anyone else, not knowing that it could be taken away from me at any moment.
Dad nodded like he understood, but he never would, not really. He’d been brought up in a peaceful house, and I’d been raised in constant chaos. Part of me knew it was their addiction, but part of me blamed them for everything I’d gone through.
“I’ll order pizza for dinner,” Mom shouted as I turned and walked out of the room. I lifted my hand to acknowledge her. Realizing that was what a normal teenager would do. And it was as I was walking up the stairs to my room that I told myself I could relax. I could let them be parents to me now. I could lower my guard.
I’d been on edge for as long as I could remember, but maybe now it was time to pull back.
MATEO
The mansion was quiet, but it was something I was used to. The protected walls of my boss’s house had become my solace over the last couple of years. In this home, people looked out for each other, we were a family even though we didn’t have the same blood running through our veins.
It was a stark contrast to where I lived. Mayhem filled the apartment I went home to every day, but it would only be a matter of time until we were out of there—I hoped. Everything I did here was for the two small humans who relied on me. Sometimes you had to do bad things to create good. And that was exactly what I was doing here.
The Beretta Mafia was more than what people saw on the outside. We didn’t let just anyone see what we were. We had a reputation, one that Lorenzo—the current boss—had created. But all of that was in jeopardy.
Lorenzo had been home for four days, and I’d only seen him a handful of times since then. He was looking after his wife, Aida—I understood that, but we still had work to do. I closed my eyes, trying not to remember the night both Lorenzo and Aida were taken, but it was impossible. It had been on repeat constantly.
I’d been the one driving. I should have seen it coming, but I hadn’t. I’d let my guard drop and they’d been kidnapped because of it. The smell of the smoke coming from the engine filled my nostrils, and if it wasn’t for my hands clasping the edge of the desk, I would have sworn I was back there.
My muscles tensed the longer I had my eyes closed, but I snapped them open as I heard footsteps near. Tension was building with the threat of another storm brewing. Only this time I would be prepared, this time I wouldn’t put Lorenzo in danger by not being aware of my surroundings. Which was why I was waiting for the security guy to turn up to check over the new system I’d built.
I glanced at my cell, seeing he was already running ten minutes late, but that wasn’t anything unusual for the people who tiptoed the line between right and wrong.
“Is he in his office?” a woman’s voice asked, and I turned in my seat in the new command center. The room next to Lorenzo’s office in his mansion had been turned into a state-of-the-art defense against anything that would come our way. The wall was full of security feeds from inside and outside the mansion, as well as several cameras that were in the new top-of-the-line SUV. It was a good setup, but it could be better, which was what this meeting was about.
Lorenzo had put me in charge of security the moment he’d come home, and I took it seriously. It was a step up from what I’d always done for him. I was rising in the ranks, and even though it meant more responsibility, it also meant I could get my little brother and sister away from our mom. That was my end goal, it had been from the moment I asked Lorenzo for a job just one week after dropping out of high school.
At sixteen he’d given me a job, one that meant I could take care of my newborn baby brother. I’d been on track to get us out by the time I was eighteen, but then Mom’s belly started to grow again. And nine months later, my little sister entered the world. It had changed my plans, but only momentarily. It’d take us longer to get to where I wanted to be, but we would get there—eventually.
The door to the command center opened, and I turned to face it just as Aida asked, “Mateo?”
I shook my head, and blinked, clearing my gaze to look at her properly. It was hard to see her face and not remember the injuries we’d all witnessed on her body. She’d taken the brunt of it. The people you loved were always your weakness. Which was why I promised myself I would never put anyone in that situation. I would be alone for the rest of my life rather than watch someone I loved in pain. I saw it every day when I looked into the eyes of my little brother and sister, and I didn’t need more of it. I was trying, but sometimes it didn’t feel like I was trying hard enough.
“Yeah.” I tried to smile, but it was hard when all I could think about were the scars that littered her back.
“You okay?”
I cleared my throat, not sure what I was going to say, but it didn’t matter because the doorbell rang, interrupting us. “I better get that.” I took a quick look at the monitor to make sure that it was the security guy, then stood.
“You know you can talk to me, right?” Aida said, her eyes glazing over. She hadn’t looked at me the same since I’d told her a few months ago that I’d had to drop out of high school. Part of me regretted telling her. I didn’t want or need sympathy. I was doing what was best for my family.
“I know,” I murmured, slipping past her, effectively ending the conversation.
I walked toward the front door, opened it, and stared at the small man dressed in navy from head to toe. He couldn’t have been more than five foot, but his stern face told me he meant business.