Fighting Burke’s advances spurs him on almost as much as being weak and vulnerable does. He’s a predator through and through. I was hoping to avoid him until I could figure out what to do, but I should have known better. Far too many females can attest that Alpha Burke doesn’t back off until he gets what he wants, one way or another.
Just get through today, Seneca. After that, he and everyone else will be busy preparing for the ceremony, and then you can come up with a plan. Honor your mother, let him paw and get it out of his system, and then the Flux will be here before you know it.
I hold my breath, my body going rigid as he practically buries his face in my hair. A few of the pack members skirt by us, their eyes locked on the ground, not interested in getting involved, no matter how wrong this is or how uncomfortable I obviously am.
“Mmmmm,” is growled into my ear sensually, and I tamp down the revulsion that crawls up my throat. “Yours might be my favorite scent ever,” he declares, his chest brushing against my arm.
I roll my eyes and lean away from him as much as I can, completely disgusted. What kind of male hits on a pack member who just lost her mom?
Burke picks up a strand of my thick umber-brown hair and plays with it between his fingers before leaning back with a chuckle. Sometimes, I can’t tell if he’s oblivious to the nauseating effect he has on me, or if he likes it and pushes my boundaries solely because my discomfort does something for him. I look up, unable to stop the warning that fills my arctic blue eyes. It’s one thing to corner me around our home and pull this shit, but this is my mother’s funeral. I thought he’d at least pretend to care and show a little decorum. Now I see how naive and stupid that was.
His black eyes glitter with amusement as I shove my hair behind my shoulder and step away from the hand at the small of my back.
“I need to finish burying my mom, if you don’t mind,” I announce caustically, and his lascivious smile grows even wider.
“Sure, you do that,” he tells me, his tone authoritative as though I require his permission. “But you and I need to talk about your living situation, so come find me when you’re done.”
Confusion moves through me, and his words cause my feet to stop in their tracks. “What’s the problem with my living situation?” I ask, crossing my arms over my chest when his skeevy eyes spend too much time studying the neckline of the black dress I’m wearing.
He lifts a shoulder. “It’s no big deal at all, it’s just that your home belongs to the pack healer, and...well, the pack doesn’t have one anymore. You have until after the Flux, but when the new healer arrives...” He doesn’t finish his sentence, but he doesn’t need to. Is he seriously going to kick me out of my home? My father built that house.
I clench my jaw, swallowing down the vitriol I want to spew, refusing to take the bait. This seems to amuse him even more, because he flashes a wolfish grin at me like a starved person watching a loaded dinner plate being set in front of them.
“Of course by that time, your wolf will have come, and you know what’s going to happen then, Seneca.”
My spine stiffens both at his insinuation and the use of Seneca. I don’t want him to have any part of me. Nothing. Not even his mouth momentarily wrapping itself around my name for the second it takes him to speak it.
“The Flux ceremony is about honoring the wolf spirit that chooses its host,” I bite back, while the rest of the black-clad and disheveled pack members trickle away.
“Sure it is,” he replies with a cocky twist of his lips. “It’s also about the males choosing between the she-wolves who come to play and claiming one for himself.” His eyes skim over me. “I’ve been waiting a long time for this, and I’m going to enjoy seeing your new wolf immediately roll over to show me her belly. Once you have her, you’ll be begging me to claim you.”
Bile rises up the back of my throat, but I say nothing. What can I say? The horrible thing is...there’s a very real chance it’ll happen exactly like that. And there won’t be a damn thing I can do about it.
No one can control the Flux. When I give myself to the ceremony and take in the wolf spirit that chooses me, it’s out of my hands, and most females immediately submit to a male. It’s a sacred ceremony, one that should be honored and celebrated. But all Burke cares about is dominating. Claiming. Taking what isn’t offered. And the salt in the wound is...my wolf might want him to.
As if he can see the fire dim in my eyes, Burke winks, and then he leans down, fisting some loose dirt in his hand before dropping it in my mother’s grave with an unceremonious toss. Then he turns and walks away with his hands in his pockets, whistling a damn tune as he goes.
I hate him.
Looking back at the freshly turned soil now covering the coffin, I swallow hard, ignoring the two gangly shifters waiting off to the side awkwardly, shovels already in their hands to finish securing my mom’s body in the ground as soon as I leave.
She’s gone. My father’s gone. I have no other family left.
Above me, the sky finally crumples, like it’s squeezing the clouds in its fist. Raindrops fall just as I turn away, unable to bear the sight of the grave turning into a muddy, puddled mess. My mom would’ve hated that.
I walk away, the sky’s offering mocking my dry cheeks. Even knowing that I’ll forever be separated from her by six feet of cruel earth, I still don’t cry. Instead, the clouds mourn for me as if they’re trying to show me the way.
If only I weren’t too lost to follow.
The healer house, my house, is quiet.
It was never quiet before.
With a pack as large as Twin Rivers boasting several hundred shifters, our house always had someone in it being treated by my mother. That’s what happens when you’re the pack healer. Rain or shine, dawn or dusk, someone always needed her.
Full moons were the worst. That’s when Burke runs the mandatory pack fights. To keep a healthy hierarchy, he always says. But really, he just likes watching pack members beat the shit out of each other. Since most of them don’t actually move up, it’s all for entertainment.
My mom despised the fights, of course. A lot of the pack do. But leaving isn’t easy, especially for the families who’ve been on this land for generations upon generations. So, we all just wait and hope that the day will come when Burke is challenged and he loses.
Until then, my mother was always there, ready to set bones before they healed too quickly, to use her magic to ease their pain and calm their wolves. If Burke wants someone to patch up his pack members by the next moon, he’s going to have to get a healer soon. And just the thought of someone taking her place, of living in my home...
I shake my head and walk down the light-yellow hallway that suddenly feels too narrow. Mom painted it a happy color. She said it would wrap you up in a hug when you came home. But all I feel is cold and lonely as I head for my room. I don’t let myself look in the direction of hers; I don’t want to see the emptiness that’s a reflection of what I feel in my soul.
The smell of lavender and vetiver greets me as I open my door. I peel off my wet dress and underwear, flopping them into the sink as soon as I walk into the bathroom. It takes me fifteen minutes of just standing under the hot spray of the shower before I feel whole enough to actually wash. Another fifteen to get myself out and dressed in leggings and a long-sleeved shirt, because even though it’s warm out, I feel cold to the bone.