The man in black grabs her by the arm so hard that she winces.
My lips tremble and I twist against Luke’s hold. “Mammy! Mammy, don’t leave! Ye said ye’ll always be with me!”
“Shut it, Kyle,” Dad scolds.
Usually, I would listen, but I can’t tonight. Tonight, I want Mammy to hold me and put me back to sleep, even if it’s not in our new home. We can just stay with Daddy so he doesn’t get mad.
“Sweetheart.” She smiles at me through the tears. “It’s going to be okay.”
“Really?”
“Really.” She faces Daddy again. “I will tell ye.”
“Ye will tell me what?”
“All I know about the Russians’ attack. Also, ye should know there’s a traitor by yer side.”
He narrows his eyes. “Why should I believe ye?”
“Because I wouldn’t have wanted to leave if he weren’t a threat.”
“Ye will truly tell me everything?”
“Aye, but ye have to let me be with Kyle.”
“Ye will never escape again?” He doesn’t seem mad anymore, just…sad. But why? Daddy is never sad.
Mammy shakes her head once. “I won’t.”
“How do I know ye’re not bluffing?”
“I would never put Kyle in danger. Ye know that.”
“Right. Go on.”
She opens her mouth to speak, but it remains suspended with no sound coming out as a loud pop echoes in the air.
I hold my breath and my tears, not sure what just happened. A liquid pours out from the center of her chest, soaking the black jacket as she staggers and falls in Patrick’s arms.
“M-Mammy…?” My voice is small, hesitant. She’s not moving.
“Amy!” Daddy bellows, falling to his knees in front of her. “Get the fucker who did this!”
Patrick drops Mammy and runs in the opposite direction, but I don’t focus on him. The only thing I can see is Mammy on the ground, not able to move. Why can’t she? Is it because of the patch of liquid on her chest, which Daddy is squeezing?
“Mammy…” I call her again ’cause she always replies.
She doesn’t now.
Her head is lolling to the side and she’s coughing blood. That can’t be good. Mammy said blood gets out of people when they’re hurt.
“Amy…fuck…” Daddy holds her cheek tighter. “Stay with me…I’ll forgive anything if ye just…stay.”
“K-Kyle…” she mumbles.
Daddy motions at Luke, and he puts me on my feet beside her. Her eyes are half-closed as if she wants to go to sleep, but she smiles up at me. “S-so sorry, sweetheart. Mammy is so sorry.”
“Why?”
“B-because I couldn’t protect ye.”
“I will.” Daddy places an arm around my shoulder. “So don’t go. Kyle is the reason ye went through all of this, so it’s useless if ye die now.”
“Ye’re a good man, Niall. Ye truly are, but ye’re influenced by bad apples who clouded yer reason.” She places her hand on top of his. “I’ve never regretted making the decision to be with ye. Ye kept us safe as ye promised and…I-I’ll forever be grateful.”
“Amy…ye’re not allowed to leave.”
“I-if ye ever loved me, t-take care of Kyle…please…”
“Mammy…” I place my small hand on her mouth, wiping away the blood. “Are ye hurt?”
“I-I think so, sweetheart.”
“I’m gonna remove the blood so ye’re not.” I wipe at it with the sleeve of my coat, but it keeps coming out over and over again, streaming down her chin.
“Th-that’s my good boy.” She smiles a little. “Ye were born for great things, sweetheart. Make Mammy proud, okay?”
Daddy’s lips thin. “Stop talking like that, Amy.”
“Will ye take care of him, Niall?”
“Ye’ll wake up and do it yourself.”
“Promise ye’ll raise him properly. P-promise.”
“I will.”
Her lips remain frozen in a smile as a tear slides down her cheek. “Thank ye…”
She blinks once, then stops altogether, her eyes open wide but not looking at me.
“Mammy!” I scream. “Mammy!”
“Fuck,” Daddy murmurs under his breath, still grabbing her by the chest. “Fucking fuck!”
“Why isn’t Mammy moving?” I shriek. “Help her! She’s hurt.”
He squeezes my shoulder, and it’s like he’s about to crush my bones. “I’m sorry, lad. So sorry.”
“I don’t want ye sorry. I want Mammy to move.”
“Take him to his room, Luke.”
“Not so fast.” The familiar voice comes from behind us.
Daddy turns around, but it’s already too late. A pop echoes in the air and a patch of red explodes on Daddy’s white shirt. His hand falls from my shoulder as he staggers and his face hits the grass.
“D-Daddy…?”
I stare at how he’s sprawled on top of Mammy, but they’re not moving. It’s like they’re asleep, but they shouldn’t be asleep with their eyes open and blood all over them, right?
The blood has to be gone.
All of it.
I turn around to tell Luke to help them, but someone hits me across the face. My body swings back and I fall on the ground with a thud.
My vision moves between my parents, unable to take my eyes off them. If I sleep, they’ll be there in the morning, right?
“What should we do with the lad, boss? Kill him?” one of the men in black asks.
“Aye, of course. He’s a liability that we need to take care of,” another replies.
“No.” The one who shot Daddy interrupts them, his eyes glinting in the dark night. “I have better plans for him.”
Kyle
Present
I close my eyes for the briefest of seconds to chase away the assault of memories.
That night, my fate was decided.
I wasn’t only deprived of my parents, I also lost the only two people who protected me from the world. The disaster was brutal and happened without a warning.
But that was the mere beginning of my life, the starting point of how I turned into this shadow.
It’s not the end.
Life might be a bitch, but I didn’t just die. I was given a second chance in the form of becoming a shadow, a chance to cut their throats one by each one.
I’m close.
After nearly thirty years, I’m so fucking close to making my mother proud. I’ve become worse than an ogre. I’m a monster with nothing to lose, and those who were behind her death will pay in the same blood that left her body and Dad’s.
It’s not only my own, the Irish, but it’s also the Russians. The one Mum trusted and gave information in exchange for getting us out—he betrayed her and was one of the main reasons behind her death.
It’s as unforgivable as the Irish fucker who killed my father in cold blood and seized his power. He tossed me aside as if I were an insect so I didn’t get in the way of his grand plans.