An instant flash of Tessa baring herself and the baby latching on while he watched burned itself into his brain. The image wasn’t sexual exactly. Natural. Beautiful. Primal.
It made him hard as hell.
To hide his reaction, he turned and headed for the kitchen, stepping behind the counter as he pretended to grab a glass of water. “Nope. I wouldn’t be good at that. But if you need anything else, the offer stands.”
“Thanks. Have any dinner requests?”
“Let me take you out so you don’t have to cook.” Seriously, as tired as she looked, he didn’t want to add to her pile of things to do.
“I’d rather keep Hallie in until her immune system matures a bit.”
Fair point. “I can grab some takeout.”
“I appreciate it, but that won’t help me whittle my waistline.” She sighed. “Eight pounds to go.”
“You look great, Tessa. Seriously.”
A pink flush crept up her cheeks. “But I still can’t get into my work clothes. I have to do that by Monday or I won’t have anything to wear, so I can’t afford the extra calories. I’ve been marinating some chicken, if you don’t mind having that with some steamed broccoli and brown rice.”
“Great. What can I do?”
Tessa cast an indecisive glance between the kitchen and her bedroom. “Let me feed Hallie. Then I’ll start the grill and the rice cooker.”
Before he could reply, she was gone, shutting the door between them. He’d love to be with her—beside her, helping her, watching her. He wasn’t a man who did idle well, and waiting for her to do all the work chafed him.
He didn’t know a hell of a lot about cooking in the kitchen, but how hard could it be? Besides, it would give him something to do besides stare at her closed door, wanting what he couldn’t have.
In the backyard, he found her gas grill on the small patio, along with a bunch of evergreens bisected by a stone path through the grass, leading to a tiled deck where a pair of brightly colored rockers sat around a fire table under a weeping willow. A hammock lazed in another corner between two trees. Everywhere he looked, he saw her touches in the decorative pillows and the springy wreath on the door.
He lit the grill, then meandered back into the house to figure out the rice cooker. He looked up the device’s instructions online and had the rice steaming in a handful of minutes.
After that, he searched the internet for instructions on how to steam broccoli. He felt like an idiot for having to look up something so basic, but soon, he’d cleaned and bagged the stalks before shoving them into the microwave so they would be ready to nuke when the rest of the dishes were nearly finished.
As he had last night, he’d set the table to save her the effort, then his phone rang. He plucked it from his pocket and read the display with a smile. “Hey, man.”
“Hey,” Trees greeted. “How you feeling today?”
“Fine. Like I felt yesterday. Like I could be on assignment right now.”
“According to the colonel, you are. Did Tessa’s ex-douche come back?”
“Not yet.” But Zy’s gut told him this guy wasn’t giving up.
If you had a sweet, smart, gorgeous woman like Tessa who had given you pleasure and a child, would you?
Not in a million fucking years.
“So…how you doing there with Tessa?”
“Fine.”
“And?”
“And…I’m trying not to be a pain in her ass. She’s got her hands full between the baby and her ex. I don’t want her feeling like she has to wait on me.”
“Makes sense.” He paused. “She’s pretty, isn’t she?”
“Yeah. But I can’t go there, man.”
“Why not? You going to try to lie and tell me you don’t want to?” His buddy scoffed.
“You think you’re reading my mind now?”
“I know I am. I’ve known you too long. I know your type. And I know what kind of woman will make you happy. She’s it.”
He couldn’t pretend Trees was wrong. “Dude, what are you saying?”
“Just that you two would be good for each other.”
“Well, even if I want her, I can’t have her.”
“You think she’s still got a thing for her ex?”
“No.” Besides, if he wanted Tessa enough to fight for her, her ex wouldn’t stop him. “But in case you never noticed, the colonel has a nonfraternization clause in his contracts. We could both lose our jobs.”
“I’d forgotten about that.”
“I wish I could.”
“Sorry, man.”
“Fuck it. I’m sorry. Tessa’s sofa is half a foot too small for me.” And he’d spent half of last night hard for her, wondering what it would be like to curl up next to her soft body and fuck her in the middle of the night. “So I’m cranky.”
“That sounds horrible, but still cozier than my next couple of nights. Josiah, Walker, and I are pulling out with the colonel to do a quick op tomorrow.”
And Zy felt like a deadbeat for not joining in, at least to watch their sixes. “Where? To do what?”
“Not sure yet. Colonel hasn’t filled us in. He says it’s pretty standard. But his new wife seems pissed.”
Too much pushback from the missus, and Edgington really might ditch his business to keep the peace. “Shit.”
“Anyway, I’ll let you know when we’re back.”
“Yeah. I’ll want to hear everything, especially if it has anything to do with the debacle in Mexico.”
“You got it. Later, Zy.”
“Later. Stay safe, huh?”
“Always.”
Trees ended the call. Behind Zy, the bedroom door opened, and he turned to find Tessa emerging, Hallie half-asleep in her arms.
She glanced at the rice cooker on the island and frowned. “You started dinner?”
“Yeah. No reason to wait.”
“You didn’t have to do that.”
She said that a lot. “No sweat. You’re busy, you’re tired, and you don’t need to wait on me. I’m eating, too. So I took a stab at meal prep. The grill is heating up. Rice is on. Broccoli is ready to nuke.”
“And you set the table.” She looked ready to cry.
Zy edged closer. “I was trying to be helpful, but—”
“You are.” She sniffled.
What the hell was wrong with her? “Hey, I didn’t mean to upset you. Have a seat on the couch. Play with Hallie. I’m going to throw the chicken on the grill. We’ll probably be ready to eat in ten.”
“Thank you.” Tessa opened her mouth as if she had a million more things to say, but her gorgeous green eyes communicated everything her words didn’t. “Really.”
He got it now. No one had taken care of her in a long while, and it fucking irritated him, even as he hurt for her. Zy cleared his throat and turned away. If he didn’t, he’d probably do something stupid like put his arms around her and press his lips to hers. He’d ask her forgiveness later.
Soon, they sat at the table while Hallie cooed happily in her baby swing. The silence between them bugged the shit out of Zy.