I casually stroll around the block instead until I’m standing near the Brown’s backyard. A fence surrounds the yard. But this is not some charming white wooden picket fence. No, this is a privacy fence clearly designed to prevent peaking into their backyard and back windows, which is strange since this is suburbia and no one else has a fence around their yard. Considering it also looks brand-spanking-new, my suspicious radar is on high alert.
Since the temperature is around freezing and there’s a light snow falling, no one else is out and about. Perfect. I look around one more time to make sure I’m truly alone out here. Yep, I’m all alone. Everyone is probably tucked up in their homes where it’s cozy and warm while I’m outside discovering why people flee the Midwest for the West Coast. The wind whipping off the lake sure is cold in this city.
I study the fence for a moment. I’m guessing it’s higher than six feet, maybe seven. I’m five-nine, I can totally do this. All those stupid gymnastics classes I was forced to take as a teenager are finally going to come in handy. I take a running leap at the fence and grab the top. My legs flail for a moment, but I manage to get traction and haul myself over.
I land on my feet inside of the Brown’s backyard. For a moment, I have the urge to throw my hands in the air as if I just landed a double layout with a full twist. A feat I never managed in my short gymnastics career. I squash the urge and kneel down. I see a hedge and maneuver myself behind it to get my bearings.
Once my heart rate is back under control, I peek out from behind the hedge for a look at the house. My jaw drops. This side of the house does not look like the boring beige suburban ranch the front does. Not at all. The entire back wall is windows, and the ceilings are vaulted. On one side, there’s a kitchen to die for with marble countertops and stainless-steel appliances. On the other side is the open living room where someone is installing a television nearly as large as the wall.
My suspicious radar is now beeping in the red alert area. There is no way Melanie Brown can afford this house. Unless she happens to be expecting a great big paycheck from say an insurance company.
I slowly make my way to the other side of the yard, camera at the ready, with my eyes fixated on the house. My foot slips and I look down to see I’ve walked onto a tarp. A tarp? Why is there a tarp in the middle of their yard? I scan the area and realize the tarp covers an inground pool. Oh shit. I stand perfectly still, wondering if the tarp can handle my weight. My feet begin to sink. I guess it can’t. I leap toward the edge of the pool. The tarp collapses before I can reach safety.
Suddenly, I’m waist-deep in water. I grab the camera and hold it above my head as I slog my way to the stairs now visible in one corner of the pool.
“Hey! Get out of my yard!” A man shouts.
There’s no need to yell, I’m leaving already. I take a running leap at the fence and vault over it. As soon as my feet land on the other side, I’m moving. I run as fast as my feet will take me to my vehicle. I don’t take time to catch my breath once I’m inside. I switch on the engine and tear out of there.
I keep my eyes peeled on the rearview mirror as I fly out of the suburb. When I don’t see a vehicle chasing me, I slow down and crank the heat up. I am absolutely freezing. Being drenched in thirty-degree weather will do that to a woman.
By the time I park in the underground parking garage of the building where the private investigator offices are located, my teeth are chattering. I may have managed to keep most of my coat dry, but my pants are soaked through as are my cheap canvas shoes. At least I wasn’t wearing my Louboutins.
I squish my way to the office, dripping water all over the place as I go. I open the door and Lola, Hailey’s dog, immediately rushes out of Hailey’s office and comes barreling toward me. This dog loves me. Way too much if you ask me. I push her snout away.
“Not today, Lola.”
“Look what the cat dragged in.” Suzie points to me and cackles.
Hailey rushes out of her office. She slaps Suzie on the shoulder. “Stop it. Phoebe looks frozen. What happened?”
My teeth chatter as I open my mouth to answer.
“Never mind. Let’s get you warmed up. I have some sweats in my office. They’ll be a little short on you, but they’re clean and dry.” Hailey’s an inch shorter than me, but at this point, I’d take a pair of pants from a munchkin as long as they’re dry.
Lola lays down in front of me with her big head on her paws and whines. “I thought you were getting her fixed.”
“Poor Lola. The mean lady wants to get you spayed.” Suzie pouts and claps her hands for the dog to come to her. Fat chance of Lola obeying when I’m around. I’m not bragging. The dog is scary obsessed with me.
Hailey shoves sweats and a pair of fluffy socks into my hands. “Go, get changed.”
I don’t argue despite never having worn a pair of sweats a day in my life. Even when I was doing gymnastics, I wasn’t allowed sweats. I could wear a warm-up outfit but sweats? Sweats are undignified and unladylike. Never mind I was a fourteen-year-old girl.
When I come out of the tiny restroom of our office, Hailey and Suzie are waiting on me.
“What happened?” Hailey asks while Suzie rubs her hands together in anticipation.
“Coffee,” I demand. Since we don’t have a coffee maker in the office, my demand should buy me some time.
Suzie holds out a to-go cup. “I know you like plain black coffee, but I got you a pumpkin spice latte. I figured you could use the extra sugar.”
I don’t like plain black coffee. Does anyone? Plain black coffee is bitter and boring, but it also has zero calories. Pumpkin spice latte probably has five-gazillion calories, which is five-gazillion minus twelve-hundred too many. I don’t complain, though. Since I don’t have money for fancy coffee, I’ll take whatever I can get.
“The Browns have a pool,” I start and then go on to tell them about my embarrassing day.
Hailey taps her chin. “Maybe we should tell the insurance company we came up with bupkis. Two other firms couldn’t find any evidence Mr. Brown faked his death either.”
My nose squishes of its own accord. I do not want to admit to failure. I’ve had enough of failure in my thirty-one-years of living. I clear my throat. I don’t like disagreeing with Hailey, but I need to start standing up for myself. It’s about time someone stood up for me.
“I’d like to give it one more try.”
Hailey shrugs. “It’s your choice.” She stands and returns to her office like it’s totally no big deal I contradicted her. Maybe it’s not?
Suzie claps. “If this is the result of you continuing to try, I’m all for it.” She gives me two thumbs-up.
I roll my eyes and head to my office. My office. Just thinking the words fills me with glee. I know I’m not bringing in enough business for the firm to merit my own office. Not yet, I remind myself. Because I am bound and determined to become the best darn PI You Cheat, We Eat has ever seen.
Chapter 3
When in doubt, take a bow. ~ Phoebe’s rules for becoming a better person
I stare at the sign as I stand frozen on the sidewalk – McGraw’s Pub. The bar Hailey’s dad – aka Pops – owns and runs has become my second home since I moved to Milwaukee. Second home? Scratch that. I’ve never had a home before – at least not one where I felt welcome. But I do feel welcome at McGraw’s.