Beth’s eyes fixed on Dorran. The hand on Clare’s shoulder tightened a fraction. “This is the man you’ve been staying with?”
“Yes.” Clare reached towards him. “I’m really glad you get to meet him. Dorran, this is Beth. Beth, Dorran.”
He dipped his head in a respectful nod, his eyes not quite meeting hers and his voice subdued. “A pleasure.”
“Mm.” Beth’s lips pressed into a tight line as her eyes ran over him, from his black hair, to his broad shoulders, across the muddied lab coat he’d borrowed from Ezra, down to the boots. Clare wished she would be more subtle about it.
“He figured out how to repair my car.” Clare spoke too fast as she tried to soften some of Beth’s hostility. “I’d never have gotten this far without him—”
“Outside,” Beth said abruptly and tugged on her arm.
“Ah—what?”
“Come on. We’ll talk outside.”
Clare stared at the windshield. Light reflected off the water flowing over the surface. “It’s raining.”
“You’re already drenched.” Beth hit a button, and the door hissed open, letting the steady drum of rain inside, along with the faint scent of smoke, oil, and hollows. “Come on. I want to talk in private.”
Clare sent Dorran an apologetic glance as she was dragged out of the bus. He looked conflicted, one hand reaching towards her, and Clare mouthed, “Don’t worry.” Then the door creaked closed behind her, sealing him inside the bus.
Beth kept her hold on Clare’s arm as she dragged her away from the vehicle. The rain, vicious in its intensity at Helexis Tower, had reduced to a drizzle in the outer suburbs.
Clare blinked at the space, surprised. Beth had stopped the minibus in the centre of a shopping mall’s parking lot. They were well lit as gigantic bulbs washed the area with cold white light. Clare didn’t know how the lights could still be running four weeks into the stillness. Even if the centre had a generator—and she guessed it must have for emergencies—it would need to be refuelled. The area seemed deserted except for their vehicle.
“Beth?” Clare was already wet from the run out of Helexis Tower, but the new wash of rain drained another layer of warmth. Her sneakers sank into a puddle two inches deep, and she shivered. Beth stopped a dozen paces away from the bus, facing the deserted shopping mall, arms crossed. Clare hunched her shoulders. “Is everything okay?”
Beth dragged her hands over her hair, plastering it back, and then turned towards Clare. “I don’t like the way he looks.”
She’d been expecting wariness towards Dorran. “He’s a good man. He’s kind and patient, and he saved my life. Multiple times. I can’t even begin to tell you how much I owe him.”
Beth paced across the asphalt, arms folded, expression tense. When she turned back to Clare, there was fresh suspicion in her eyes. “He looks sick.”
“He…” She could tell Beth exactly what had happened: about how Dorran had been coerced into becoming part of Ezra’s experiment to destroy the thanites and how they didn’t know what the consequences might be. But the way Beth was talking about Dorran—like he was an unwanted liability—made Clare swallow the story. She couldn’t afford to give Beth any more reasons to mistrust him. Instead, she opted for a half-truth. “It’s been a weird couple of days. He didn’t sleep last night.”
“Uh-huh.” Beth’s eyes narrowed in the way they did when she was sceptical. Her jaw worked as she stared towards the bus, chewing something over. Then she took a deep breath. “We’ll drop him off with some other survivors then get back on the road.”
“What?” Clare blinked water out of her eyes.
“Don’t worry. I know some groups that would take him in.”
“No.” Clare took a step back, her heart thundering. “We’re not going to abandon him. We’re a team.”
“He’s a stranger.”
“To you.” She hated how defensive she sounded, but she couldn’t stop. “He’s my best friend.”
Beth’s lips twisted. “Oh, really? After knowing him for what? A couple of weeks?”
“After having to rely on him for my survival, repeatedly, through some of the worst moments of my life, yeah. And I think I’m a good enough judge of character to say I trust him. Why can’t you believe that?”
“Oh, I don’t know.” Beth’s voice rose, and a harsh note entered it. “Maybe because I can’t even trust you to follow basic instructions.”
It took Clare a second to catch the implication. “Are you angry because I came looking for you?”
“What did I tell you the last time we spoke?” Beth lifted her eyebrows to arrest Clare with one of the sharpest looks she’d ever experienced. “Stay where you are.”
“Your generator died. Was I supposed to just leave you there to suffocate?”
“Yes.” Beth held her hands out to the sides, her open palms catching the rain. “It would have been better than traipsing across the country, just to find my bunker was empty. And if that weren’t bad enough… what the hell were you doing in the city? The single most dangerous place in this part of the country.”
Clare was used to her share of lectures from Beth. She’d hated them as a teen, but as she grew older and moved into her own home, she’d learned to see them for what they really were: an expression of love. Beth cared about her. Therefore, Beth worried about her. Therefore, Beth lectured her.
But this felt different. There wasn’t any concerned tilt to her sister’s eyes or pleading note in her voice. This Beth, the Beth who had been hardened and sharpened by the still world, was full of fire and wrath. Clare took a half step back.
“We—” Were lost. Became trapped. Ran out of options. None of them sounded good. She swallowed. “We found the tower by pure luck and recognised the address, so we took a chance on it.”
“And how were you planning to get out?” Beth’s piercing blue eyes were relentless. “You ran through the horde with no weapons. No protection. Not even a mask. If I hadn’t been there, what would you have done to escape the hollows?”
The rain drenched Clare’s skin. Her hair stuck to her face. But for all the external cold she felt, it was nothing compared to the lump of ice forming deep in her stomach.
She’d been desperate to reunite with Beth. She’d taken risks she shouldn’t have, just for the hope of finding her. But Beth was furious. And, unlike a normal lecture, she didn’t know how to stop this new anger.
Beth took her silence for the answer it was. “You had no way to get out of that tower, did you? You’re only alive right now because of pure, miserable luck.”
Angry tears were building, and she was grateful that the rain would stop Beth from seeing them.
“I told you all of this so clearly.” Beth’s voice dropped until it was almost inaudible through the rain. “Don’t take risks. People who gamble on the odds eventually lose. And what did you do?”
“Whatever it took to try to find my sister.”
Beth’s face stayed hard for all of a second, then the expression crumpled. She exhaled, head drooping and shoulders bowing. For a moment, they stood together, letting the rain beat on their backs and drip off their chins. Then Beth lifted her head, her expression soft again.