Meridian parked a few spots down from where the limo sat idling. He got out and opened Melinda’s door for her. She didn’t dart out of the car as he assumed an emotional mother would. Instead, she took a couple of deep breaths, dug a crumpled handkerchief from her purse and wiped it quickly across her cheeks. Then she stood and steeled her spine, staring straight ahead at the sleek limousine.
“You’re telling me my oldest son is in that car.”
Meridian didn’t respond. He led her towards the vehicle and opened the back door. She ducked inside and he closed it behind her.
It took a lot of willpower for Ex to pull his gaze away from Meridian to watch his mother cross the small distance towards him. The tears in her eyes, the rapid rise and fall of her chest, and the stuttering gait as if she struggled to put one foot before the other were all reactions that threatened to overtake him. He couldn’t let them. His stare returned to his partner in his tailored black suit and black dress shirt. He looked sharp and deadly. His only loyal friend, and Ex couldn’t believe Meridian had come through and done this for him. They could be under surveillance right now. Once they were activated, they’d be tracked and monitored immediately. Their handlers would be online and waiting for their check-in.
But there was no way he could leave without letting his mother know... see... that she wasn’t childless. Everything she’d done for him in his young life, every night job she’d worked and the lonely nights she’d endured on his behalf so he and Evan could be something, would never allow him to desert her.
The door opened and the scent of Estée Lauder filtered into the dark interior before his mother climbed inside, choosing the seat closest to the door. Nostalgia tried to settle into his rigid bones but he forced his childhood memories away. He sat straight with both hands resting on his thighs. He held her misty gaze as she cried quietly into her palms, shaking as she sized him up and down slowly.
The door on the opposite side opened and Meridian eased his large body into the bench seat across from them and once again enclosed them in darkness... and silence. Ex knew he should say something, he had agreed to this, but now his tongue felt too thick for his mouth. His pulse beat out of control and he had to make an extra effort to remain unfazed on the outside.
“Hello,” he said to his mother as if he were a robot.
She gasped and shook her head as if she couldn’t believe her ears. “Hello? Hello?” she sputtered. “If I weren’t so relieved to see you I’d slap the spit out of your mouth.”
Ex felt his mouth twitch at hearing his mother’s favorite threat when he’d been a headstrong teenager. He didn’t say anything, just watched her. She may not have been able to stand up to the violent husband she’d run away from but she’d chastised her boys with a quick tongue and an iron fist.
His mother’s hands shook in her lap. She frowned at him, squinting as if she was trying to make out all of his features in the dim lighting. “Are you my son?” she whispered. “Are you still my Xavier?”
He understood her question. While he was a changed man... a killing man, he would always be her son. He refused to let anyone take her from him. “I am. I’m just different than—”
Before he could finish his sentence, she launched herself across the space separating them and threw her arms around his neck. His shocked gaze flew to Meridian who gave him a slight nod, silently telling him it was okay to be uncomfortable while urging him not to overreact. He could feel her arms were seven inches above his black leather gun holster. He could smell the lavender in his mom’s blonde and gray hair from the conditioner she used. He could feel her heart pumping at a hundred and twelve beats per minute against his chest.
He was a man trained to notice everything.
His hands were clenched in his lap as he slowly breathed through the embrace. The last hug he’d had was from Evan a year and a half ago. Affectionate moments were too far between for him to ever get used to it. He’d been taught that emotions were weaknesses his enemy could exploit.
His mother carefully pulled away when she noticed he wasn’t reacting in the same manner as her. “I’m sorry.” She sniffed, wiping at her nose with the white cloth in her hand. “You don’t feel the same.”
I’m not the same. “I’m sorry about Ev. He didn’t deserve this.” He knew his tone sounded cold and disinterested, making him pause and try a different pitch. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there.”
His mom shook her head vehemently. “No. The two of you were inseparable growing up. You would’ve been with him, and those bastards would’ve got both my boys.”
His gaze went to Meridian and his mother’s followed. She stared at his partner, perhaps not quite knowing what to think about his detached expression or the firm set of his full lips. He sat as straight and rigid as Ex, tightly packed muscles just about concealed beneath his expensive suit.
“And you are?” his mother asked, seeming to gather herself.
Meridian wet his lips—a sign he was just as uneasy as Ex—and mumbled mechanically, “John Smith.”
Ex didn’t marvel at how Meridian had gotten his cautious mother to come with him when she didn’t even have his name, only a hardened face and unapproachable posture to go on. And yet she’d gotten into a car with him. But his partner had a gift of wearing whatever mask necessary to get a mark to trust him, at least long enough for him to get close enough to...
She frowned and turned back to him, timidly reaching for his fist. He let her pat his cool skin.
“I knew you were still on this earth, Xavier. I could feel it,” she whispered. “It wasn’t because they said there was no body to recover, but because I’m your mother and I know your spirit would’ve come to me if you’d died.”
Xavier glanced at the cross around her neck.
“But you have to leave now.” The tears had started to fall again and Ex flexed his hands when he had a foreign feeling to reach out and touch her. His mom looked tired and much older than her sixty-one years. “This city is in a war, and infested with drug gangs and violence. It’s no place for a disciplined man. I don’t know what you do in the military. Evan would never say much. But he said you were important. Don’t linger here, especially not for me. I’m gonna be moving to New Haven with John.”
He already knew this. He’d seen when Mr. Harold had been promoted to the New Haven district manager position at his Amazon job, and was able to put two and two together when she’d put her house on the market a week later.
“I just can’t take it here anymore. I think there’ve been thugs outside my home because I went to the police all those times. Trying to scare me. As if taking my Ev wasn’t enough,” she gasped as if struck by an immense pain in her chest and before he knew what he was doing, he’d reached for her hand and held on. She seemed to gather a bit more strength when she glanced at their connection then clutched him back. “I’ll leave a forwarding address with the post office.”
“Don’t,” Ex said. “I’ll find you.”
His mom swallowed, her gaze darting to Meridian who hadn’t made a move, but Ex was very aware of him. “Even the cops couldn’t help me. Or any of us who’ve complained that still live in my neighborhood. There’s a big-time police drug task force here that the mayor put together a few years ago, but they refused to help me. Or they couldn’t help me. Their hands were tied, I don’t know. But my son’s killer roams the streets freely, enjoying his life while I—”