When he proposed yesterday, it was nothing fancy. But it was enough for me. Enough for us.
And now I was getting ready to walk down the aisle. A second time. A real wedding, with true vows.
“There you go. All done,” Mirai announced, snapping me out of my thoughts. She moved beside me, so we were both facing the mirror. My makeup was minimal as I had asked; Mirai did a perfect job and my scars looked less prominent under the layers of foundation. I wasn’t exactly self-conscious about them, but my scars always reminded of that night.
It was an ugly, constant reminder of Gracelynn’s death.
That my sister died and I somehow survived.
That she lost her happy ending…
While I got my own.
My vision blurred before a lonely tear slid down my scarred cheek. God, I missed her. Especially today. I missed her easy smile and her deep laughter. I missed my sister, plain and simple.
My father’s hurt ego robbed my sister of her happily ever after. Of her unborn child and her love. How unfair it was that while he hated me; while I was always meant to be the victim of his elaborate murder plans – his real daughter turned out to be the casualty.
I thought I’d eventually become numb to the memories, to the pain of losing Gracelynn – but I was wrong. The pain never lessened. The misery never wavered. The guilt never eased. They were still heavy in my heart and my nightmares were a constant reminder of that. The anguish of that night; the despair of living with those memories; the grief of moving on without her.
“Julianna!” Mirai admonished. “You’re going to mess up your makeup.”
She dabbed my tears away, while mumbling under her breath. “No crying today, please.”
“I just–” I choked on my tears and swallowed my cry. “Sorry, you’re right. No crying today.”
“It’s a happy day.”
My heart swelled at her tender smile. “It’s a happy day,” I agreed.
Mirai took a step back and admired me from head to toe. She clucked her tongue in approval, nodding. “I can’t lie, I love this dress better than your other one.”
My wedding dress was simple compared to the extravagant one I wore to my first wedding. Yesterday, Killian had arranged for a wedding dress designer to come to the Island with over twenty dresses option. While they all ranged from simple to extravagantly beautiful, only one captured my eyes.
My chosen dress was composed of sheer lace and layers of tulles, with tiny flowers motif along the bodice and long sleeves, adding a whimsical touch. The bodice the dress was also delicately peppered with sheer of tulle, which complemented the sexy illusion neckline. Elegant and pretty.
I hoped Killian liked this dress. We were doing the “can’t see the bride before the wedding” ritual, and while he was pissed – of course, he was – Emily and Mirai had teamed up against him and had locked him out of the bedroom.
He pounded on the door for the first hour. He cursed a few times. Then tried to sweet talk me into opening the door for him… when that didn’t work, he went back to cursing.
After a while, Killian finally gave up.
Or I thought so.
My phone pinged with a message and I rolled my eyes.
“Does he ever give up?” Mirai mumbled.
I grabbed my phone off the vanity, only to see that it was in fact Killian messaging me. A giddy smile spread across my lips. “I guess not.”
Killian: Let me in.
Me: Why?
Killian: I want a kiss.
It wasn’t the first time Killian tried to convince me to open the door through texting. He almost succeeded a few hours ago, when he decided not to play fair by sending me dirty texts and getting me aroused.
Since I was pregnant, my libido was all time high. So I quickly figured out that his goal was to get me to come to him by having me all excited for his touch.
He almost won if it wasn’t for Mirai catching me trying to sneak out of the room.
Neither Killian nor I believed in superstitions. But if we could avoid any bad luck from hereafter, I wasn’t risking it.
Me: You can kiss me at the altar.
Killian: I want more than a kiss. Can’t do that at the altar.
By now, I was grinning so bad my cheeks were beginning to hurt. I had been so touch deprived, so love deprived for the last four years that I was now practically swooning at every little attention. Romantic Killian was my favorite Killian.
Me: You can do that after the wedding.
Killian: I fucked up.
Me: What do you mean?
Killian: I imagined you in your wedding dress, walking down the aisle to me… and then I imagined how fucking good it’d feel to rip that dress off you and eat you out like my favorite dessert. So now my dick is aching. You’re killing me, Princess.
Me: First, it’s not my fault your imagination decided to run so wild. Second, you ARE NOT ripping my dress off. I’ll be mad and instead of “consummating” our marriage as you desperately want to, you’ll be sleeping on the floor.
Killian: Let me in. Please.
Me: You really thought saying please was going to help your case?
Killian: Yes?
He sounded so hopeful in that one-word text that I imagined him pouting as he waited for me to open the door. A giggle escaped past my lips while I quickly typed back a message.
Me: Patience is a virtue.
Killian: I’m not fucking virtuous.
Me: I love you.
Killian: I love you too. Now, can I have pussy for a late lunch?
Me: Dinner.
Killian: Afternoon snack?
Me: Dinner.
Killian. Fuck.
Mirai let out a choked cough and I dropped my phone on the vanity, before meeting her eyes through the mirror. Her cheeks were tinted pink and she was biting back a smile.
A flush sneaked up my neck and my cheeks at the knowing look she was giving me. “Were you reading my texts?”
“Nope.”
I squinted at her suspiciously. “Liar.”
“You should have agreed to the afternoon snack.”
“Afternoon snack?” Emily bustled into the room, my white veil in her hands. “Are you hungry? I can make you a snack.”
“I don’t know about Julianna but I definitely think Killian is hungry,” Mirai mumbled.
Oh my God.
I let out a silent gasp but Emily was oblivious, thank God.
Mirai took my white, lace veil from her grandmother and came back to me. “Here it is.”
“Thank you.” My smile widened. “Can you help me?”
I faced the mirror and Mirai secured the veil over my head with the gorgeous handmade leaf tiara, embellished with tiny crystals, that Emily made me – as a wedding present. It was the only sparkly thing about my wedding outfit.