"Home," I echo, then point at the broken shell. "Home?"
She chuckles and shakes her head, tugging on my hand again. "Home," she repeats, leading me away from the water's edge. She pulls me along after her, returning to the cave we slept in last night. Then she turns and gestures at me. "Rukh Har-loh home."
She's…tired? I try to grasp what she is saying. Does she wish to sleep? I motion to go inside, but she shakes her head again. Frustration flashes through her gaze and she gestures at the entirety of the small cave. "Home…sew wekkan haf home fur behbeh." She pats her flat stomach. "Kit."
I touch her stomach, trying to understand. Is her kit coming now?
Har-loh shakes her head again. She purses her lips, thinking. "Rukh, Har-loh, kit." She pauses and gestures at the fire pit. "Fire. Furs. Cave." She makes a big circling gesture with her hand and looks at me again. "Home."
I frown, trying to follow. All these things are this word? Both of us, our kit, the furs, the shell she wished to keep…and then realization strikes me. I have seen animals make a nest for their young. Does Har-loh wish to make a nest? I put a hand to her belly. "Home… Har-loh Rukh kit home?"
She nods excitedly. "Dinkyew gottit, behbeh."
"Home," I repeat to myself. A nest. A safe place for my mate and I to have our kit. It should be comfortable, and safe. I think of the distressed sounds she made this morning when the crawlers were on her boots. I look at the small cave, tinier than the one I left behind in the mountains and not nearly as comfortable. This will not do.
My Har-loh and my kit deserve a better nest than this.
I take my mate's hand. "Home," I say again, and tug her along with me. This beach is full of small caves of varying sizes. We will find a better one for our nest and then Har-loh will be happy. I will make a home for my family, and we will be together, always.
3
HARLOW
We need so many things.
As we go up and down the beach, I gather everything that might be useful. Shells big enough to work as utensils or plates, reeds that can be dried and woven into baskets, stones that work well for cooking—everything can be repurposed. It doesn't take long to fill my bag, and as we drop off our findings, I realize just how much we need. We need stones to surround the fire pit. We need utensils and cooking tools. We need furs for clothing and boots and warm blankets.
We need a bigger cave.
I chew on my lip, trying not to fret over everything. I'm a worrier, it's just who I am. I'm sure being diagnosed with cancer influenced that. My cancer's in remission now, though, thanks to my khui. I can afford to look on the bright side of things.
And I've got Rukh at my side. Whatever it is I need, he'll help me get because he adores me as much as I adore him.
So I eye our small cave and then turn to my mate. "We need a bigger place."
He frowns. "Repeat, Har-loh?"
"Small," I say, gesturing at the cave. "It's too small." I tap on the low ceiling, which he has to crouch under. "Small. We want big." I spread my hands. "Big cave."
Recognition dawns across his face. He takes my hand, gesturing farther down the beach.
I get excited. "Is there another cave? You know of one?" I shouldn't be surprised. The mountains here are positively honeycombed with caves and fissures everywhere. I'm no scientist, but I can't help but think it has something to do with all the hot springs everywhere. Whatever the reason, I'm glad for it. We can make the tiny cave work, but I'd much rather have someplace where we can stretch out and enjoy ourselves if this is going to be our new home.
We hike across the beach, Rukh holding my hand tightly even when it's inconvenient. It's like he doesn't want to let me go. I don't mind. I'm happy to be held onto. We scramble across rocks and move to the far end of the cove. We're a short distance from the tall cliffs, but not so far that it'll be an all-day hike to get into the snowy hills where the animals with fur tend to hang out. I haven't seen anything furry wander across the beach. I don't know if we're scaring them off or if they just don't come down here. There's been a few big, fearsome-looking birds—ostriches with anger issues, I like to think of them—that we avoid. Mostly though, it's just crabs and things like that.
Feels weird to be on a beach and not hear the constant cries of seagulls.
Just when I'm ready to take a break because it feels as if we've crossed the entire beach, Rukh heads toward a rocky outcrop. Farther back, I can see a few blind canyons framed by rock, but he doesn't head toward them. He heads to the outcrop and it takes a moment, but then I see the entrance to the cave.
It's a large one, all right. Even from here, I can tell that the ceiling is tall enough for Rukh to stand fully, without his horns scraping against the ceiling. I glance around. We're in the most protected part of the cove here, with the waves a short distance away, but not so close that we have to worry about tides. The interior isn't extremely deep, but it's spacious, with a shallow front chamber studded with stalactites and then a deeper inner chamber that's large and roomy. It's a little messy—there's a layer of grit all over the floor and what look like dead crab shells along the walls, but cleaning is easy enough.
Best of all, there's a trickle of water gliding into a tiny pool near the front. It looks like it's coming straight from the stone, which means it's fresh water, not salt water. I catch a few drops on my fingers and taste it. Yup. Fresh and cold.
I turn to look at Rukh. He's watching me with a guarded expression, as if he's worried I won't like the place. I suspect that if I told him it was terrible, he'd keep on searching until he found me something better, even if it took years. That's just who he is. He wants the best for me, even if it means far more work.
I move to him and take his hands. "It's perfect." I beam at him. "This is a very good cave. We can make our family here."
"Yes?" he asks.
"Yes," I agree, squeezing his hands. "A very big yes!"
RUKH
My mate never stops working, even in the new cave. We bring our small pile of possessions over to our new spot, and Har-loh works on sweeping out all of the dead things and the sand on the floor. It is not an easy task, but when everything is finally clean and all the debris gone, we gather rocks and make a fire pit near the entrance, so the smoke has a place to leave. Har-loh makes a nest with the furs she wears, but I notice that she shivers when she peels them off.
We need more furs, I realize. Some for wearing and some for sleeping. We will have to hunt together, and that worries me. Har-loh is a soft creature, and hunting is hard work. The mountains are not too far of a walk, but I would rather her be safe and comfortable here in the cave. Perhaps I can go out and hunt while she stays here.
I do not like the idea, but I also do not like the idea of taking my mate with me on a dangerous hunt. Many of the animals in the snows have long claws and sharp fangs, and Har-loh's spotted flesh would tear easily. It will gut me to be apart from her for a day, but it will be necessary.
Har-loh must be kept warm, and this beach does not have fur.