What I look at though is the way she moves. It’s gracefulness and sophistication at their finest.
It’s like she’s not really here. Like she’s set apart from everything else that’s happening. I wonder if that’s what she’s doing in her mind. Is that how she’ll be able to do this job that clearly doesn’t suit her.
Someone who spent years training at Julliard and has the impressive resumé this woman has does not end up in my sex club dancing the way she is.
So what’s her story?
And, why do I care? It’s not the first time I’ve been curious about a woman. Definitely not the first time a woman has piqued my interest.
However…
She’s the first in a long, long time to spark that part of me that’s been locked away for years.
Lilly comes closer to me in her glides of grace and I get lost in the vision of her. Her movements draw me in and once again I feel it… that spark. It’s small but definitely there.
For a moment I stare on at her and take note of this feeling she creates inside me. In my thirty-six years, only one person has ever managed to reach that part of me. One person. One girl.
One girl who is no longer living. She chose it so.
Nothing has ever reminded me of the past until this woman.
I’ve purposely never allowed anything to stir that memory and I’ve certainly never allowed anyone to get as close to me as Amelia…
Amelia
That was her name. It still hurts to think her name, and I haven’t spoken her name since her death either. In some cultures, people don’t say the name of the dead when their gone. There are all sorts of reasons why. Whatever the reason, I get it. I understand it for the mere fact that it’s painful.
The fact that this woman, this dancer, should stir a memory of a girl I couldn’t save strikes me. I don’t know if it’s’ good or bad. I don’t think it can be good. How can it be. But something inside me is curious about her.
She continues in her procession toward me. I don’t think she can see me watching though. Even if she could, she’s so wrapped in the music that only it has her attention.
Closer she comes, and closer. Then the smoke and the lights fade out and I can’t see her anymore.
Everything goes dark, above and below us. The music stops and the room is pregnant with silence. It stays that way, bordering on to a full minute before a flicker of light appears before me and I see her.
I see her and she sees me and in that moment, I know why she reminds me of Amelia.
It’s the way she looks at me.
That look that actually sees me as the man and not who I am.
She’s looking at me and I can tell she’s not looking at me because I’m Christian Giordano. She’s looking past the name, and she can see me.
Crystal blue eyes cling to mine and for those few seconds she seems to drop her guard. The light of desire illuminates her eyes from deep within making them shimmer with the invitation to see into her soul.
I accept and attraction laces through me, heating my blood, stirring to life that secret part of me I locked away. Attraction radiates from me to her and I know she feels it too.
I can see it.
Then it’s like she suddenly remembers who I am, and she flinches as if someone just whispered the reminder into her ear. Wariness washes over her pretty face, but it comes with something else. Pain. It fills her eyes and comes with a plea that makes her look like she needs to be saved.
Her cheeks flush pink and I wish I could read more into what her expression is trying to tell me, but the lights brighten and the ball floats away. She moves with it, eyes still on me and the moment strikes me so deep I could still be looking at Amelia all over again.
Amelia on the edge of that cliff. Her shaking her head at me to stop me from trying to get to her, yet her eyes pleaded with me to save her.
Just like Amelia, Lilly disappears from my sight. The darkness comes swallowing the crystal ball and the music I’m used to fills the room.
The people resume hell and sin. Everything that is The Dark Odyssey awakens, bringing forth a wild dark fantasy before me, but… the memory of the angel burns a hole in my mind.
The warning comes to me to stay away from this doll. Those feelings she stirred… I don’t want them. It’s as simple as that. I don’t.
The past has taught me that sometimes you can’t save people and when you try sometimes you lose yourself.
Curiosity, however, claws through me spurred on by that ripple of that attraction I felt when I looked at Lilly.
Attraction has me wanting her. I want to see her again. I want to taste her again and there’s only one way to make that happen.
The desire that has enticed me is the kind I should overlook if only for tonight. I need to get back out on the street and do my best to find Falcone.
But what if I just had one more taste of this girl.
One time… just once with the angel and I’ll leave.
I was the first to taste her.
I should be the first to take her.
I’m a man who always gets what he wants, even if it’s to explore this thing I’m calling curiosity.
Chapter Seven
Lilly
He paid ten thousand dollars this time.
Christian Giordano has booked me again and he’s paid ten thousand dollars to spend the night with me.
I’m making my way to his suite and I don’t know what unnerves me more. The fact that he paid to see me again, or that moment we shared while I was dancing.
He looked at me like he could see straight through me. Right through to my soul and saw the girl inside screaming for help.
He caught me off guard as the music was ending and worry returned to my mind. Worry of what the night would bring and sadness over what I’d become.
I looked at him and the pull of attraction held me in place. Then I remembered who he was. A mobster of the same variety as Miguel?
I don’t know.
I’ve seen him twice now and I haven’t sensed that dark vibe about him that should warn me to stay far away. It was me who had to remind myself that he’s supposed to be the kind of man I should run away from. A man who will never be my savior in this hell.
Now look at me, Enroute to his room. Ten thousand dollars richer. In just two nights I’ve made fifteen grand from this man. Money I should be rejoicing over because I’m looking at one hell of a paycheck at the end of the exhibition.
It’s money that will change mine and Rosie’s life. If I continue like this, I’ll achieve my goal and be the mother my baby deserves.
So why am I not rejoicing?
I’m attracted to him. That’s why. I won’t even try to deny it. He’s the first man since Miguel that I’ve allowed myself to be attracted to. That’s a big deal for me.
Ahead I can see the door is open, just like last night.
I walk in and the breeze blows through the window lifting the white chiffon curtains.
The light is turned down to a soft ambient glow. As I walk further in, I see him. The breathtaking sight makes me stop and my heart skip a beat. He’s wearing similar clothes to last night and he’s equally as gorgeous. His hair is slightly ruffled with that just got out of bed sexy look and the five o’clock shadow gracing his cheeks gives him a rugged edge that makes my mouth water.