The weekend had given me two days where I didn’t see her at school. I thought maybe that would’ve helped clear my head, to try to talk myself into focusing on other things. But there was this longing inside me to talk to her, to see her. I couldn’t count how many times I picked up my cell and wanted to send her a text, to ask her if she wanted to hang out. But here I was, Monday morning and sitting in my car in the school parking lot, hoping to see her.
I’d been working on her car at Mickey’s, but because we’d come into a snag with the part, it was taking longer than necessary. Hell, I wanted to call her and ask if she wanted me to pick her up, to see if I could be the one to drive her home after school.
God, I was fucking insane. I couldn’t even stop thinking about Harlow no matter how hard I tried. In fact, forcing myself to try to put her in the back of my mind only resulted in me thinking about her even more.
It was to the point I basically said fuck it, that I’d just give in. Because what was the point of fighting something that felt so right?
I grabbed my books and got out of the car before heading toward the front doors of Silver Creek High. There was a line of yellow school buses curved around the driveway, students piling out.
I moved around everyone, keeping my head lowered, although I wanted to search for Harlow.
“Dude, she was so fucking into it Saturday. She was practically begging for my dick.”
The annoying clearly male conversation and responding laughter came through over all the other noise in the front corridor of the school.
“She would have let me put it in any hole, no fucking doubt.”
I curled my lip in disgust, knowing who spoke. I’d recognize his condescending, chauvinistic attitude and voice anywhere.
I didn’t even look at them as I passed by, but I could feel their stares on me. I knew if I glanced at them, told them exactly what I thought about their attitudes toward females, it would result in violence.
Although I was nothing like Braxton, I knew he had a short fuse. I guess that’s where he and I were the same. But where he was used to getting what he wanted, so when he didn’t get his way, he threw a temper tantrum and became aggressive, I was this way out of pure survival.
And Braxton was the kind of guy I had altercations with, the kind who thought he was better than everyone else because of his good looks and money, because his daddy bought him a brand-new car for his sixteenth birthday. He probably never worked a day in his life.
Fuck him.
I headed toward my locker, and once there and the door opened, I tossed the books I wouldn’t need this early in the morning inside. I still hadn’t seen Harlow, and probably wouldn’t until lunch. And that fucking sucked. Now that I’d come to the conclusion that I’d stop fighting my need for her, I was anxious for us to run into each other.
God, I wanted to see her and talk to her, wanted to make plans so it could just be her and me.
Maybe she didn’t even want to hang out with me.
Maybe I was reading into all this too deeply.
But I saw the way she looked at me. I saw the need that matched my own.
I didn’t know how deep her interest in me went, but I wanted to find out.
I played through my mind what I’d do when I saw her. What would I say? How would she react?
I guess I’d find out soon enough.
Chapter Eight
Harlow
I sat down at the lunch table and saw Pixie coming closer. She held a tray of food in one hand, a bottle of water in the other, and Braxton walked beside her. He had his arm over her shoulders. I didn’t know what she saw in that guy, but she had a crush on him for the past year. I was pretty sure it was because he lavished attention on her, but it was only because he hadn’t been with her yet, and he was trying to get in her pants.
Pixie was a gorgeous girl, but she was shy and overlooked that some guys were just plain assholes. She tried to look for the good in everyone. And I doubted Braxton had any.
And for some reason, the girls at Silver Creek cared more about money and social standings than a guy’s personality. They didn’t care that Braxton was a huge dick who bragged to his friends about the girl he banged over the weekend. And it made me feel sorry for them, that they needed that kind of validation from an asshole.
Fuck him.
Braxton glanced over at me as soon as he and Pixie stopped at the table. The slow grin he gave me made my skin crawl. He looked over at Pixie a second later and leaned in to whisper something in her ear. I could only roll my eyes. I’d told her plenty of times Braxton wasn’t a good guy, and although she gave me a look like she knew, she also still hung out with him and his asshole buddies. She still talked to him and told me how much she liked him.
Whatever Braxton said made her cheeks turn pink, and then he was gone, leaving her standing there clearly embarrassed. I didn’t even bother asking what he whispered to her. It was probably something filthy and sexual, knowing the kind of guy he was.
Pixie sat down beside me, and I looked around the lunchroom, hoping to see Aiden. It wasn’t like I saw him frequently during school, but now that I was actively looking for him, it was almost like he was avoiding me. Or maybe it was all in my head.
His usual spot in the cafeteria was empty, and I felt this dejection fill me.
I told myself I’d talk to him, just have the courage to break the weird ice that had seemed to grow between us. Or maybe I was making something out of nothing.
“You want to hang out this weekend?” Pixie asked, and I glanced over at her, her voice pulling me from my thoughts.
“Hang out?” I had a feeling I knew where this was going, but I didn’t say anything else as I opened up my water bottle and took a long drink.
Although Pixie was one of my closest friends, we didn’t hang out with the same crowd most of the time. She tended to flock around Braxton’s crew, whereas I kept away from them as much as I could.
She shrugged and didn’t respond right away, and I knew it was because she probably assumed what I would say. I knew she was going to ask if I wanted to go to Braxton’s party after the game this weekend. And my initial, instant reaction was to say hell no. But then she looked at me, and the expression on her face was one where she thought she could get her way if she looked pathetic.
“You know how Braxton is having that party?”
I made a disgusted sound in the back of my throat and took another drink of water so I wouldn’t start bitching about him.
“He invited me, but I’m not going alone. Will you come with me?”
I was already shaking my head, but she gave me this big, watery look.
I rolled my eyes and shook my head more before setting my water bottle on the table. “Pixie, you know that doesn’t work on me. I’m immune to your pathetic expressions.”
She held her hands up and clasped them together, as if begging me.
“Please?” She drew out the word, leaning in close and resting her head on my shoulder. “I know you hate him and his friends, and I can see why, but he hasn’t ever really shown me much interest until now, and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to jump on that opportunity, even if it’s just for that night.”
She lifted her head from my shoulder, and I snapped my head in her direction, my eyes wide. “Pixie, he’s an asshole. You know he just wants to use you, right?”