This is more than I deserve. It’s perfect.
Chills course the length of my spine. Too late I realize I’m crying, and a few tears drip on the paper. I curse, push the papers away from me, and pull my sweatshirt up to quickly wipe my eyes. Davy moves his head to rest it on my thigh.
“I’m okay,” I say, but my voice shakes. I dab my sleeve on the page to try to dry the tears. Wallace will probably see those tomorrow.
I am laugh-crying alone in my bedroom. Wonderful.
Wallace has read my mind. He has divined the things I thought while drawing this comic and put them down on paper. I don’t understand it, and I don’t know how this chain of events happened. But Wallace Warland can do magic. Actual, real magic. With words.
And it’s not just that he read my mind. It’s that he knows the material. Wallace knows the constellation Faren drew on the ceiling above their bed is called Gyurhei. He knows its mythology—or close, anyway. I could correct him on the page, but it seems like a shame to mark up such careful writing when I can’t find anything else wrong, so I’ll tell him tomorrow. None of that—the name, the mythology—was laid out in the comics. It was one of those things I had to explain when someone asked on the forums.
There’s more. I flip the last page over.
It’s a quote from Doctor Faustus.
“This word ‘damnation’ terrifies not me,
For I confound Hell in Elysium.”
He remembers. Once, and I don’t know if this was on the forums or in chat, I said Monstrous Sea was a combination of the Final Fantasy video games and the Faust legend. Most of the fans didn’t know what Faust even was, they just knew it was Damien’s last name. That was so long ago. Back at the beginning of the website, the forums. That post is long buried now.
But Wallace remembers.
CHAPTER 9
I spend a careful ten minutes sketching a stylized Orcus and its three moons around Wallace’s Doctor Faustus quote. Then a serpentine sunset riser lifting out of the ocean on one side and a dread crow with wings spread on the other. I hope he doesn’t mind.
I grab the gifts I’ve been meaning to send Max and Emmy—a copy each of the newest Monstrous Sea graphic novel compilation and a pack of Twizzlers for Max and Starburst for Emmy—and pack them up. Max lives in Canada; Emmy goes to school in California. Max’s shipping is usually a killer, but whatever, I can write it off as business expense.
Then it’s on to finishing a page of Monstrous Sea and starting another. I know the colors are on a computer and they’re the same colors I always use, but today they seem brighter. The lines are darker, stronger. I already drew the character expressions in detail, but they look better too.
The forums are alive tonight. Rainmaker has posted another chapter of his latest Monstrous Sea fanfiction, Auburn Blue. I only know this because ninety percent of the people on the boards are looking at his fanfiction thread, and he’s nowhere in sight. I don’t think he ever sticks around to see what people say about his writing. A man after my own heart.
I ignore the thread. The only fanfiction I ever plan to read is what Wallace gives me. There’s a purity to it, in knowing that it’s so good and that I’m the only one who’s seen it, that I’ll never get from something published online. This is just for me. At least for now.
I stop and reread the chapter he wrote two more times. Then I check my messages.
Emmy and Max have advised. To put it lightly.
2:00 p.m. (emmersmacks has joined the message)
emmersmacks: Wait
emmersmacks: So what happened with New Kid
2:30 p.m.
emmersmacks: But seriously
3:01 p.m.
emmersmacks: E!!
3:33 p.m.
emmersmacks: E I swear to God
3:59 p.m. (Apocalypse_Cow has joined the message)
Apocalypse_Cow: e’s dealing with new kid again?
emmersmacks: Well I think so
emmersmacks: She isnt responding
emmersmacks: And Ive only been texting her every HALF-HOUR
emmersmacks: EEEEEEEE
Apocalypse_Cow: somehow I don’t think yelling will make her look at her phone faster.
Apocalypse_Cow: why were you messaging her at 2:30? Isn’t that like 11:30 your time? I thought you had that architecture class.
emmersmacks: Dropped it
emmersmacks: Architecture is stupid
Apocalypse_Cow: but you’re a civil engineering major . . .
emmersmacks: Whats your point
Apocalypse_Cow: never mind.
Apocalypse_Cow: ELIZA. WHAT IS UP WITH NEW KID.
4:12 p.m.
emmersmacks: Let me just go die and rot in my dorm room
4:40 p.m.
emmersmacks: ughhhh
Apocalypse_Cow: *prepares funeral rites*
4:46 p.m. (MirkerLurker has joined the message )
MirkerLurker: Whoa, okay.
MirkerLurker: Obviously I should have checked this sooner.
emmersmacks: -_-
MirkerLurker: I got your package! I really like Mr. Greatbody.
emmersmacks: NEW KID
emmersmacks: NOW
MirkerLurker: What if it had gone horribly and I didn’t want to talk about it? What if I found out he was a serial killer?
emmersmacks: For godsakes at least tell me what he looks like
MirkerLurker: Max probably doesn’t want to hear about this stuff.
Apocalypse_Cow: actually, emmy built it up a lot and now i kind of want to know too.
MirkerLurker: Fine! Fine.
MirkerLurker: Dark hair, dark eyes. Taller than me. Built like a football player.
Apocalypse_Cow: a football player is writing fanfiction? remind me what world we live in.
emmersmacks: Im sure there are plenty of football players who also partake of the occasional fanfiction
emmersmacks: Go on E
MirkerLurker: He found me in the courtyard during lunch and came out to eat with me. It’s kind of weird though—he only talks sometimes, I guess, so we wrote everything down.
MirkerLurker: He showed me this thing he’s working on.
I stop. I could tell them exactly what it is, but Wallace didn’t give it to me so I could go blab about it to people. Especially not Emmy and Max—I love them, but if they know someone is trying to transcribe Monstrous Sea, and if they know I think it’s really good, they’re going to want to read it too.
I don’t want them to read it. Not only would it be without Wallace’s knowledge or permission, it would kind of ruin this happy little bubble I’m in right now. It’s a secret between me and Wallace, and I like it. I like being the only one who knows.
emmersmacks: What thing
MirkerLurker: Just some fanfiction. Haven’t read it yet though.
Apocalypse_Cow: is he on the forums? what’s his username?
MirkerLurker: Don’t know. We didn’t really get to that point.
I don’t even know if Wallace is on the forums, though I feel like it’s difficult not to know about the forums if you’re a Monstrous Sea fan. Maybe Wallace doesn’t post his work online.
Davy whines. I glance at the clock; it’s dinnertime. He’s standing at the door; I let him out so he can run to the kitchen, where Mom is already pouring his food. Church and Sully come pounding up the stairs as Davy goes down, and I shut my door before they can force their way into my room.
emmersmacks: Is that all you talked about?? Fanfiction??
emmersmacks: Boring
MirkerLurker: You’ve been watching too much Dog Days.