“I’m not gonna let you ruin your life.”
Before he can stop me, I walk over to a drain in the parking lot and proceed to dump out the contents.
Horror fills me as fifty or so tiny wax bags disappear into the sewer.
“Good God, man. Are you trying to kill yourself?”
I don’t know much about drugs, but this seems excessive for the standard user.
“I wasn’t, but I’m as good as dead now.” Anger flashes across his face. “Do you have any idea what you just did?”
Yup, it’s obvious he’s already started his descent down the rabbit hole.
“Uh…yeah. Saved your life.”
Seething, he grips a few strands of his dirty-blonde hair. “That was four-thousand dollar’s worth of heroin and coke you just destroyed.”
Yet another reason drugs suck. Dumbasses are paying out the ass to die.
I hold my arms out wide. “You’re welcome.” He starts to speak, but what I have to say is more important. “Do you have any idea how much you’re upsetting the people who love you?” Crossing my arms, I stare him down. “Dylan is literally crying herself to sleep almost every night, and Jace can’t even enjoy his brother’s football game because they’re worried about getting a phone call that you’ve overdosed, had a seizure, choked on your vomit, and died in a ditch somewhere.”
Dramatic? Yes. But sometimes scare tactics are necessary.
Shame illuminates his face. “Sawyer, it’s not—”
“I’m not interested in your excuses.” Waving a hand, I march toward my van. “The only thing I want to hear from you is a promise that you’ll stop this crap for good.”
“I can’t,” he whispers behind me.
“Yes, you ca—”
“No, I can’t.” Grabbing my elbow, he turns me around. “This isn’t what you think.” He exhales sharply. “I’m a runner.”
Oh, this is good. Admitting you have a problem is the first step.
“I know. But you can’t keep using drugs to run away from your problems—”
Exasperated, he sighs. “I meant I’m a runner for Loki.”
I’m speechless until I remember Dylan voicing how strung out he was the other night.
I point an accusatory finger at him. “You’re not fooling me, mister. Dylan said you were high as a kite the last time you two hung out.”
Pulling a joint from behind his ear, he walks over to his car. “That’s because some of my customers make me sample shit before they buy. I don’t want to, but I don’t always have a choice.”
He might as well be speaking another language, because that doesn’t make any sense to me.
“What? Why would they—”
“To make sure Loki doesn’t stiff them and it’s good quality.”
Who knew addicts were so picky?
I push that thought to the backburner. There are way more important things going on here.
“Okay, let’s say I believe your little sampling story. Why in the world would you be working for Loki in the first place? There are so many other jobs—”
“None of them pay what Loki does.”
Fair enough, but it’s still not worth the risk.
“Look, I know you need money, but can’t you find something that doesn’t come with a side of multiple felonies?”
“I tried.” His expression turns solemn. “Not everyone is smart like you, Sawyer. I have no brains, no skills, and no experience.” Bringing the joint to his lips, he inhales. “I can’t even get hired at the fucking grocery store. They ended up giving the job I interviewed for to some four-eyed nerd instead.” He looks at me. “No offense.”
I let the comment slide. “You are smart, Oakley. You just have to start putting in the effort and apply yourself.”
I know he has trouble in the classroom, but I also know if he works hard, he’ll succeed.
“No one has the patience for me, Sawyer. Every teacher I have thinks I’m a lost cause because I can’t concentrate or comprehend shit like normal people.” He leans against his car. “Working for Loki wasn’t something I planned on, but my dad told me he’s taking my car and my monthly allowance away if I don’t come back home by the end of the month.” He blows out a puff of smoke. “Loki offered me a job since—according to him—I look like a California surfer white-boy and the rich racist douchebags he’s hoping to rope in will be three times more likely to buy off me than him.” He shrugs innocently. “Plus, my dad’s the DA. So even if I get pulled over, most cops won’t arrest me.”
“Wow, with a stellar business plan like that, what could possibly go wrong?” Leaning against the side of my van, I glare at him. “At the risk of sounding like an insensitive brat, Loki’s obviously using you, which means he won’t give a shit when you end up making a wrong move and something bad happens to you.” He opens his mouth to argue, but I’m not finished. “I know you don’t want to go back home because of the whole Crystal situation, but it’s a free roof over your head, food you don’t have to pay for, and a car. Sticking it out at your dad’s for another year is way better than selling drugs and gambling with your future.”
His shoulders slump. “You don’t get it.”
He’s right, I don’t. “Then make me get it.”
Taking another pull off his joint, he grinds out, “Have you ever loved someone so much it hurts? And not just because you know you can’t have them, but seeing them reminds you of the fucked-up things you did?” His voice drops to a whisper. “Every single thing you lost.”
“I…uh…” I shake my head. “No.”
“Then consider yourself lucky, because I wouldn’t wish this shit on my worst enemy.”
I so badly wish I had the right words to get through to him.
The only thing I know is continuing down this path won’t make his life any better.
“I know your life is a mess, but I really think you need to tell your dad what happened. He’ll be upset and hurt, and yeah, he’ll probably divorce Crystal, but you’re his son.” Reaching over, I grab his chin. “What you did was wrong, but you didn’t do it alone. Crystal was the adult—”
“I was the one who manipulated her.”
That may be true, but normal grown women don’t go around screwing teenagers.
“You were what, sixteen when you first slept together? I don’t care how much you tried to coax her into sleeping with you, she should have turned you down. The fact she didn’t, proves there’s something seriously wrong with her.”
He hangs his head. “Yeah, there is.” He squeezes the back of his neck. “Sawyer, if I tell you this, can you promise you’ll keep it to yourself?”
Despite the churning in my stomach, I nod.
“I mean it. You can’t tell Dylan. She’s having a hard-enough time being around her aunt after catching us last summer, but I know she still loves her. I also know she cares about me…and if she finds out what really happened between us, it might destroy whatever’s left of their relationship and I don’t want that to happen.”