They represented the antithesis of what I planned to grow up into.
However, as they pulled up, I realized I’d been wrong. Sure, they looked a lot like us, but these pack members were different. The men and women were exchanging conversation and talking lightly as they pulled up, a contrast to our serious pack’s nature. Although I’d argue it was more fear than seriousness.
My wolf sulked a bit at our obvious mistreatment, and I didn’t have much to offer besides a ‘yeah this fucking sucks.’ Because it did. Of course it did, but until I was seventeen there wasn’t jack shit I could do about it.
I watched as my father exchanged greetings with the pack and explained where they would be staying. Luckily, it would be in the large packhouse that went mostly unused, but it was pretty shitty and I could tell from their motorcycles that it would no doubt be a downgrade for them. My eyes ran over the gleaming metal in a somewhat greedy fashion, hoping one day I could fuel the motorcycle obsession I had by getting one.
My father narrowed his eyes on me as he tugged me forward by my shirt, and I tried to keep my snarl down, shaking the hand of the alpha while meeting his gaze without flinching.
I stayed silent, though, not wanting to let out an aggressive sound towards my father and have the alpha think it was in a threatening way towards him. I would lose that battle. Horribly.
“What’s your name?” he asked, his eyes shading with something as he looked at my father briefly and then back to me.
“Raphael.” At that moment, I felt like something odd had passed between us, and later that evening I found out what.
Apparently, the man had been there to talk to my father about ‘fixing’ his pack and how he was treating his family. Some other shit as well—rumors had been moving around the supernatural community about drugs and the like in our pack. My father didn’t take the suggestions very well, as one could imagine.
After our guests had gone to bed, my father and uncle had gotten absolutely fucking wasted. They began yelling at me and I took it, ignoring them while smoking a cigarette in the living room of our trailer, the news quietly talking about everything going wrong in the world. The last thing I saw was something about a hurricane hitting New Orleans before my uncle hit the back of my head with a whiskey bottle. Then my wolf had taken over.
I don’t remember much after that, but the place had been destroyed, and both my father and uncle had been hospitalized. I should have been punished for it, especially since the visiting alpha was there.
Instead, he had chosen to take the pack under his guidance after I had stated firmly I wanted nothing to fucking do with it. It was mine by birth, but I wanted to get the fuck out any way possible.
Shortly after that, my father’s younger brother, my only other uncle, had moved some of our pack, including me, to New Orleans. I didn’t bother to say goodbye to any of them the day I left Lucas’s pack lands at seventeen.
Of course, it hadn’t been the alpha’s fault, and I think he understood that. I think he also understood that it benefited him if I left because I was stronger than him, and my wolf wouldn’t have been able to deal with being told what to do.
While I didn’t have my own pack now, I considered my family a makeshift pack, and it worked perfectly for my wolf and me. I think besides Zachariah, the two of us always fighting for dominance a bit, the rest of the guys had no issue with the concept.
I didn’t regret what had happened regarding my family, but there were days I wished my life had been different. Days when I wished I’d had a mother that loved me. That I’d had a father that didn’t take out his anger on me. I still wished that I had a loving family that my kids would get to know one day. That shit wasn’t in the cards for me, and that was okay. It had made me who I was… made me the person that Narc was in love with.
I considered her my family. I considered the guys my family. It had taken some time to adjust to it, but now I couldn’t imagine my life without them. Declan and Zachariah didn’t even surprise me all that much, if we were being honest.
Sure, the timing when everything collided had surprised me, but they’d been around for some time. I knew how much attention Narc had paid to them. Knew how much she cared about them despite her denial.
I shook my head as my wolf reminded me that the woman at the top of our mind was still fucking missing. I didn’t even bother talking him through it, because he knew we couldn’t do shit right now. I didn’t try to stop the angry rumble that broke through my chest.
“I see you still don’t have control over your wolf,” a familiar voice goaded from inside the bar. Speak of the fucking devil. Well, I wouldn’t give him that much power, actually.
My eyes snapped over to find my uncle, the one that had moved me here, watching me through narrowed, beady eyes as he took a swig from one of the countless beer bottles in front of him. I had to admit I forgot about this bastard a lot of the time, and then when I did see him, he pissed me the fuck off. He looked and acted so much like his brothers. It didn’t surprise me in the least that he was here instead of out helping. Useless, lazy piece of shit.
Was it any question why I didn’t associate with these assholes anymore?
Instead of honoring him with an answer, I took out my cell phone and briefly checked the time. Did time go by differently in the Demonic realm? It had been a little over two hours here, but for her had it been longer? Maker, I hoped not. I hoped Dorian had found her and that she hadn’t managed to find trouble in that small amount of time.
Well, trouble usually found her, but both were concerning. I was glad she was with the others, though. It made me worry less about her being in Hell than I would have otherwise. I just wished we were with her. More specifically, I wished I was with her. I wanted to fight for her and be by her side. It was a goddamn compulsion.
I was crazy about that woman.
My lips tilted into a smile thinking about how things would be different when this was over and we tried to resume “normal” life. There were no more secrets or hidden feelings lingering. Now we just had to decide what our future looked like for our family.
Ideally? I wanted Narcissa in our house, wherever the hell we chose to live. In our bed, even if we needed a massive one. And more specifically, bonded to us in any way possible.
I knew Narc wasn’t a fan of traditional institutes like marriage. In the supernatural community, though, it was possible to get married to several people, and I was sort of hoping that she would want that.
I had wanted to call her my wife from the first time I realized I loved her. Obviously, the decision would be a group one, and mostly based on her. If she decided she didn’t want to get married, I was fine with that as well. Because in my heart, mind, and soul, I would always be completely devoted to her.
I chuckled to myself thinking about the conversation in September we’d had about marriage and kids.
“I’m not saying I don’t want to get married,” she insisted, “I’m just saying the actual institution is stupid. I think if you love someone, you should always be ‘married’ emotionally and mentally, whether or not it is legal or some shit. I mean, hell, why else would you start a family, you know?”
“Do you want a family one day?” I asked cautiously, not positive exactly how I felt, considering my own past. Was it bad that my answer somewhat relied on what my mate said?