“See you in a few months.” Chance winks before he takes off. I stand there alone wishing I had someone to celebrate with. This was my plan, wasn't it? To find myself while I was here. To see some of the world while I was in Europe.
I head back to my hotel room, changing into something more comfortable. I am not going to allow myself to wallow. I’m in France. With no real plans, I decide to just walk. I find a little café, where I order a hot chocolate and some croissants. My phone dings. I smile at the name.
MINE: I miss you.
ME: Then come back to me.
MINE: If only it were that easy.
I don’t respond to that. For all I know he could have a whole life out in Hong Kong. Still he never stops texting. Over the next two weeks I manage to see almost everything I wanted in France. I will miss the croissants. Now I’m on to my next adventure. I sit back and relax as the train takes me toward Italy. There has been no sign of Luke, only his texts. Each one is sweeter than the last. It’s hard not to text him back, but I don’t. I’m being spiteful, and I know it. Or maybe I’m trying to protect myself from a situation that I know will end in heartache.
When I make it to Italy, there is a driver waiting at the train station for me. He takes me to the hotel. I have two days to explore this beautiful place until my next meeting. I have to admit that I’m starting to get homesick. I miss my sister Kennedy the most. I decide to shower before bothering to unpack. Maybe the water will wash away some of this sadness that I’ve been feeling. When I step out of the shower a little while later, I’m shocked to see Luke standing there. He looks so damn handsome in his suit that I immediately become wet between my thighs.
“Drop the robe,” he orders. I do it without question. This time our lovemaking isn’t rushed. It’s slow and sweet. So sweet I have to fight not to cry. I’m in love with this man, but I know that as soon as I fall asleep he’ll leave again.
“Pretty eyes. You have to text me back. You need to give me something.”
“No.” I reach up and grab the headboard, needing something to hold on to as his thrusts grow harder with my defiance. “Does it turn you on that I’m likely the only woman that tells you no when you issue a demand?” Maybe that’s what this is about to him. He enjoys the chase. But what happens if I finally give in?
“You’re the only woman I want and the only one that matters.” I cry out when he thrusts harder into me all the way to the hilt. I feel his release spill inside of me. My sex contracts around him, wanting every last drop of him.
He rests on top of me. I love the way the weight of his body feels. My eyes sting with tears because I know what’s coming next. I quickly blink them away. Why can’t I chalk this up to some fling I’m having? Make it a part of this whole finding myself thing?
He groans when he pulls out, and I feel some of his release spill out of me. We only ever talked about protection that one time. He refused to wear a condom. I didn't want anything between us either. Does he think I’m on birth control? I watch him get dressed.
“You have another meeting tomorrow?” he asks as he buttons up his shirt. I nod. The last one. “Where will you head next?”
I shrug, which gets me a hard stare.
“You do know I don’t have to tell you shit about what I’m doing, right? It’s not like you tell me anything before you slip out of bed in the mornings.” He stares at me, and I stare right back until his head drops. I won the stare-off, but it doesn't actually feel like a win. He comes back over to the bed and kisses me.
When he pulls back, he stares into my eyes. He looks like he wants to say something, but he doesn't. He only kisses me again and then I watch as he leaves. At least this time I’m awake when he walks out. I’m not really sure if that makes it easier or harder, to be honest.
My heart feels heavy until the urge to vomit hits me. I jump up, running to the bathroom and barely make it in time. When I’m done I brush my teeth and stare at myself in the mirror. I didn't feel sick when I woke up. Panic begins to rise in my throat as I try to remember the last time I had my period. I try to slow my breathing as the feeling of nausea threatens to take over again. I need to concentrate. I already know the answer. It was before my sister’s wedding. I don’t need a test to tell me that I am pregnant. I already know.
I am having Luke Kane’s baby. The baby of a man who said he didn't want children or marriage.
9
Luke
“You okay, man?” Clark asks. No, I’m far from okay, and it has nothing to do with the bust that is about to go down. Kinley has dropped off the map. She abruptly boarded a private plane after her last meeting and headed back to the States. There was only one person she could have gotten to set up a private plane for her, and that was my brother. And he won’t tell me shit about her.
“I want this to be over.” I want to be back with Kinley planning our future. Fucking crazy how fast finding the right woman could change you. I’d do anything for her.
“What’s her name?” My head jerks up to look over at Clark. He holds his hands up in a motion that says he doesn't want to fight with me. “You were all about this when we came to you and now it seems as though you can’t get out fast enough.”
“I could have walked away months ago,” I point out. This was going to be one of the biggest drug busts in history. Not for one second had anyone ever suspected that I was working with Interpol. I did it for the thrill at first. It was different. I’d been into it. Now all I can think about is Kinley. Who would take care of her if I got hurt? I am ready for a different life. One that includes her.
I do exports and imports. It's how I’ve always made my money. Then one afternoon Chan asked for a meeting. He was one of the biggest players in the underground drug world. I’d agreed because I was curious as to what he wanted from me. I had no idea he was going to want me to export drugs for him. He tried to bring me in on it. I would have made millions. I told him I had to think about it. I didn't. I knew from the start I wasn't doing that shit. I keep my hands clean.
I made a few calls, and that’s when Clark showed up at my door. We made a deal that included me agreeing to Chan’s proposal. Problem was it wasn't going down quickly enough. For months I’ve been here playing this game. Often having to go out with these ruthless people that only care about the money they are going to make on the sale of the drugs. They don’t have any regard for human life. There are things I’ve seen that I’ll never unsee in my life. The only time that darkness fades from my mind is when Kinley is near me. She makes it feel like the sun is on my face and I can breathe in the fresh air.
“We’re on.” I nod, getting out of my car as truck after truck rolls in. I motion towards the first crate so they can start loading. I try to look bored, but it’s not too long until Chan and Lie show up. They have a few other men with them I don’t recognize.
They’re already loading up a third crate with drugs. “Everything is going as planned?”
“Seems so,” I agree with a shrug. “How long is this gonna take? Want to see if the chick I had last night is still around. Fuck, I never had my cock sucked so good in my life.” They all chuckle.