Until it isn’t.
Until you start to see things. The little truths at first. And then there’s nothing stopping you from the violent fall.
“Raine? You ready?”
A simple voice is enough to break my thoughts into pieces. Out of everyone in my life, Nick’s betrayal hurt me the most. As if I wasn’t above selling my soul to a devil for him...
Don’t go there, Raine, don’t you dare.
“I’m ready,” I tell that to Nick but when I take another look in the mirror, I don’t like what I see. I look young, too young for this world. As if a white gown can magically restore all my innocence. Nowadays, I’m not even allowed to choose my own dress.
Damn it.
Before he can say anything, I dive for the red lipstick, swiping it over my lips with a smile. There. Once Papa said that only a whore will choose such a bold color. How befitting is that even a whore has more freedom than me?
“Papa won’t like it if we’re late,” Nick blurts out, running his finger through his hair, and my heart lurches.
Not because he’s worried, it’s because we are so far apart that he can’t see the pain in my eyes. I can’t help but retort. “If I’m late, Nick. You mean he won’t like it if I’m late.”
He looks at me then, really looks with a frown. For a brief second, I wonder if the brother I had before everything fell apart is back when he shakes his head, erasing every bit of hope within me. “Let’s go. It’s really getting late.”
This time I follow him without a word until someone clears their throat. My body stiffens completely before I can control the action. Nick must have realized that I stopped as he turns around to chide me but in a minute, there’s a tight-lipped smile in his face.
“Papa.”
Speak of the devil.
In spite of the fear growing in my bones, I have no choice but to turn around and return his affection. He wraps me into a bone-crushing hug, forcing me to stop breathing. Only when he lets me go that I dare to breathe.
Still, the smell of blood lingers...
“Nicholas, Raine. You two dressed up good.”
My brother is eager to answer quickly. He always is.
“I wanted to make you proud. And...” He pauses as if now realizing that I’m with them. “This is an important function after all.”
Oh, he calls mingling with Mafia leaders from all over the world an important function. Maybe for them, it is. But for me, it’s just another way for my father to let everyone know who runs the La Eme now that Bratva has taken over most of the business.
After all, the real King is dead.
For them anyway. But he remains in my nightmare, whispering every depraved thing he’d do to me once he’s out.
You’re my thorn.
I can’t let you go now.
You’re mine.
Some days, I pray that it was real.
Some nights, I fear if he’ll ever find me the same.
Papa waves his hand, shooing any concern Nick might have. “I am proud, son. But, Raine, I want the same good behavior from you too. No more lashing out...” He trails off noticing the redness of my lips. His eyes flare but this party must be important enough to ignore my little act. “Just stay close to your brother, and you’ll be free for the rest of the night.”
My father loves to make deals even with me. If I go with him to his stupid parties, he leaves me to myself for a week. That’s why I chin up, meeting his eyes to accept the deal.
“I will stick to the usual.”
He gives me a rare smile, the one I used to love growing up. “Remember, you’re Raine Tay Orlov. My daughter, my Princess, you can survive anything.”
If only, I could trust half his words nowadays...
Clenching my jaw, I have no choice but to match Papa’s footsteps. My brother is just behind us, an infuriating presence I can’t seem to ignore like other times. My eyes find the presence of another man though, even before I notice the crowd gathering around us.
“Come on, Princess. Careful.”
I hate the way his eyes crinkle as he says the word my father forced everyone to call me when I was dragged in this place. Everyone says it with fear, he says it with blunt mockery.
“Carter, Glad you can join us. Keep an eye on the Princess, I need to talk with Valentine a bit.” Papa doesn’t wait around for my scowl to see. Nick is with me though and he tugs me toward one of his friends once Papa is out of sight.
“Raine, you know Vick. Vick, this is my sister I told you about.” Vick doesn’t know the word boundary as he practically leans in to kiss my lips.
“красивая. As I was told.”
Carter pushes him a bit though. His eyes flash in annoyance that Nick doesn’t have the decency to see the way his friend looks at me. No shame or hiding his arousal. But I’m used to it. Every party he drags me around like some pretty doll waiting to be sold.
Five years ago, Nick betrayed me, he violently tore my trust like I was nothing. But the worst thing? I let him. I let him go astray while I kept that hope that I was going to survive anything.
Together.
We didn’t need anyone. Not our father or mother. But he quickly put me to believe that there was nothing called trust in our world.
“Don’t you get bored with getting tossed around like this?” Startled, I look around to find Carter watching me with an amused look. He was never too careful with his words. For that reason only, I can tolerate him a bit.
Also, there’s no sign of Papa or Nick. That's another plus. Feeling brave, I shrug. “This Princess has to stay in line or she will see the door to the basement in a minute. But you do know that, don’t you?”
He shares the same somber look. “So you are aware of your daddy’s cruelty but don’t know why everyone is so excited to meet you?”
Meet me?
I think I heard wrong as I let out a pitiful laugh. “They aren’t here to meet me, Carter. They are here because Stefan Orlov wants everyone to know that no one can cross him.”
His eyebrow almost reaches his hairline as he grasps the meaning of my statement. “Fuck, Princess! You really don’t know. Just look around, what do you see?”
What do I see?
People with beautiful dresses. Men with so many things to hide. Curious eyes following my every movement-
My eyes drop immediately. God, I’ve attended parties before, but I never held their attention for more than five minutes. What if Carter is right? What if they are here for me? But today isn’t my birthday and I can’t think of any other way I’ll be useful to them unless...
“Excuse me, everyone!” Papa’s hearty voice fills the whole room. He looks around as if seeking out everyone before his eyes fall upon mine. I flinch. A sharp look I’m terrified to voice into covers his face as he takes the microphone again. “It’s my pleasure to have you all here today. Cause today we are joined together not only by loyalty but also by blood.”
His face contorts into a big smile as he offers me his hand. “Today I’m announcing the engagement of my daughter Raine Orlov to Vick Da Vale, cheers!”
With trembled hands, I try to reach out to anyone who is close enough. The words reach to my ears but I’m already falling into the familiar darkness. And the worst part?
When I feel his betrayed gaze beneath the darkness anyway...