“Expendable. Babe. That’s a heavy word.”
I exhale slowly, trying to breathe through the emotion rolling through me. “My first real love broke it off with me because he thought we were too young to settle down. We were, but it still hurt.”
“Yeah.”
“Other than him, every guy I’ve dated since treated me like good enough for now, but no talk of more. No future, no meeting friends or family or spending holidays together. Just, good enough to fuck.”
“Babe. That hurts me.”
I smile, but it’s hard. “It hurts me too. There was one guy a couple of years ago who I really liked, and I thought he really liked me. He said his work was really challenging and he didn’t have a lot of time, but he would make it for me. It took me two months, two damn months to realize he was only coming over to fuck, and then he would leave. I let him do that for months thinking he would start to like me more, but he never did. He dumped me after four months because he met someone. I was just something he did for a while. I was expendable.”
“He was an ass.”
“Maybe. After that, I decided hookups only. Get in, get out, no names, no dates. Just sex.”
“Tell me about you and Gen.”
“It’s complicated.”
“You’re in love with him, aren’t you?”
“Why does everyone say that?”
“Because we can tell?”
“I don’t want to be in love with him.”
“Why? He’s great.”
“Yeah, he’s great, and as you’re figuring out, he’s not open to love with anyone. He’s just another person who would break my heart, so I keep him safely in the friend capacity. Until you came along, we never crossed that line.”
“But you wanted to. You both did.”
I nod. “Yeah, there’s always been attraction.”
“Okay, so I’m paraphrasing here, but I think you said you want a stable relationship with someone who values you beyond that tight little ass of yours. Am I right?”
I laugh quietly. “Basically.”
“And you’re in love with Gen, but scared of that, which I totally get. And you like me enough to see where it goes?”
“I like you, but I’m scared.”
“What if I told you, Cai, that you and I want the same thing? I want to build something. Something good and strong and lasting. I want someone to come home to. Someone who’s been waiting all day to see me again.” His eyes turn glassy with tears as he speaks. “I want it bad, and I want it with you and Gen. I think we could do it if we can get him to see what we do. That he can have what he needs too. We can do this, but I need you on my side.”
My thoughts swirl wildly in my head. What he’s proposing is beyond sex, and that’s where the danger comes in. Besides, getting the ice fortress around Gen to melt is a monumental feat.
“Cai? Are you with me?”
Gazing up into his eyes, I find my heart and my mind warring with each other, but slowly, gently, my heart starts to win. “Yes. I’m with you, Luca.”
Smiling, he brushes his lips over mine. “That’s awesome. Here’s what I propose. We call Gen and have a meeting to discuss what this is between us and lay some ground rules to avoid confusion or hurt feelings.”
“Okay, but if you say any of the stuff you just said to me, he’ll run so fast he’ll leave skid marks.”
Luca chuckles. ”Good point. We’ll avoid that and keep it simple.”
I nod. “Sounds good.”
“Then I want to take you out. I want to do fun things with you and get to know you more. You’re pretty, Cai, and yeah, I do like messing around with you, but I know there’s more beneath that precious exterior. Will you let me in?”
“I’ll try, Luca. I really will try.”
“All I can ask. I need your help with Gen too. You know how to calm him and center him. He looks to you for support. I want to be that for him, too, but I know that will take time.”
“I’ll keep him off the ledge.”
We both laugh. “Good. Want to Netflix and chill tonight?”
“I do, but I want to kiss you.”
“Mm, I want to kiss you too. Bad.” Luca runs his hand across my neck, settling on the back of it. “I think it’ll be okay with him.”
“Give me your phone.”
Grinning, Luca reaches into his front pocket and hands it to me. I press the button next to Gen’s name on the video chat. When he answers, his face is covered in white goop.
“What are you doing?” I ask.
“Beauty treatments. Obvs. You don’t stay this gorgeous without help.”
Shaking my head, I laugh. “Luca and I have a question.”
“I’m all ears, boys.”
Luca leans in so he’s on the screen too. “Can I kiss your boo even when you’re not here?”
Gen’s eyebrows bounce quickly before he settles into a smirk. “Asking permission to make out?”
“Or whatever,” Luca adds. “We just want to make sure it’s cool.”
“You haven’t been doing anything up till now?”
We both shake our heads as Luca answers. “Nope.”
Gen tilts his head, his eyes gleaming with mischief like they do. “I think I can be agreeable under one little stipulation.”
“Name it,” Luca says, wrapping his arm around my waist.
“I get a preview right now. Kiss pretty little Cairo for me, Luca. Let me see.”
“Now you’re talking.”
Luca’s lips come down on mine, taking my mouth in a possessive kiss that I can feel all the way to my toes. I’d say he was putting on a show, but no, this is how he always kisses, with every part of his body into it. His fingers move into my hair as he presses his body against mine. I’m pinned between his soft body, rock hard dick, and the cool marble of the island, and it feels like the best place on Earth. His tongue explores my mouth, sucking on mine in between bottom lip nibbles. My dick twitches in my jeans, filling quickly as I hump against him. Luca hums into my mouth, sending vibrations through every part of me as his kiss slowly consumes me until I’m left boneless and panting against him.
He gazes into the phone and my eyes follow. Gen’s lips are parted as he watches with hooded eyes.
“Permission granted, boys,” he says, his voice husky with lust. “And anything else you get up to, I’ll expect a play by play.”
“Sure you don’t want to come over?” I ask.
“I’m sure. I need to clean and do laundry. Ugh. So much domesticity. You have fun, and we’ll catch up tomorrow night.”
“Okay.”
“Cai, can I speak to you directly?” Gen asks.
“Sure.” I turn the speaker off and hold the phone to my ear. “What’s up, boo?”
“Okay, that was fucking fire.”
I giggle, glancing at Luca as he sips his lemonade. “It was.”
“I want you to feel free to do whatever you want tonight. Luca isn’t mine exclusively. He’s ours. Do whatever feels good, no guilt or worry about me. I’ll be back with you both soon enough.”
“You’re sure?”