Mercifully, she found a parking spot close to the front of the place, so she was able to balance Jackson on one hip in a well-practiced move and make her way inside in less than a minute. The walls between apartments might as well have been made of construction paper, and even from the hallway, she caught not-quiet strains of speed metal, an argument over who had eaten “the last goddamn bagel!”, and someone power-walking over their kitchen linoleum in what had to be five-inch heels made of titanium.
“Alright, buddy,” Tess murmured to Jackson. “Here we go. 14A.” But just as she reached up to knock on the door, it swung open, sending her heart into her windpipe.
“Whoa!” she chirped, instinctively cradling Jackson to her chest with both arms as her balance threatened to leave the building. But Declan had instincts of his own, it seemed, and his arms shot around her in the same instant, keeping her from stumbling.
“Steady,” he said, the word landing an inch from her ear. “I’ve got you.”
For a split second, they stood on his threshold, her arms wrapped around the baby and Declan’s arms wrapped around her, the crisp, no-frills scent of his soap filling her senses and the feel of his muscles unyielding around her, and Tess wanted nothing more than to melt into his touch, just as she had during their wedding ceremony.
But then Jackson squeaked his surprise, and she shifted back, her cheeks prickling. “Sorry,” she murmured. “I’m not usually so clumsy.”
“It’s my fault for startling you.” Declan looked from her to Jackson, who had—not shockingly—buried his face in her shirt. “You both alright, then?”
“Yep. Perfectly fine,” Tess said, half-wishing for the ground to swallow her up and half-wishing that Declan would put his arms back around her again. Gah, she was an idiot on so many levels right now.
Declan kindly spared her with a nod. “So, ah. Jackson, right?” he asked, gesturing to the baby currently cling-wrapped to her chest with the sort of wary glance that told her his experience with babies was probably hovering right around nil.
Tess smiled without realizing she would. Awkward or not, at least he hadn’t ignored the little guy. “Yeah. Sorry,” she said as Jackson eyed Declan back with equal guardedness. “He’s kind of going through a no-strangers phase right now.”
Rather than take offense, Declan shrugged, shifting back to better honor Jackson’s space. “Smart plan for a wee lad, actually.”
Stepping all the way out of his apartment, he turned to pull the door shut and lock it, but not before Tess got a solid glimpse of the stark, one-room interior.
“Are you waiting on a furniture delivery or something?” she asked, hearing the nosy words only after she’d spoken them. But come on. He didn’t even have a futon or a couch, let alone a bed. All Tess had seen was his large black duffel bag on the floor.
Declan shrugged. “There’s a recliner.”
Tess laughed for a full five seconds before she realized he was serious. “That’s it?”
“It’s not so bad,” he said, holding the front door open to usher her back into the sunshine of the morning. “They didn’t have any furnished units available, but the recliner was in storage, so…”
“Right. I’m sure it smells fantastic.”
She trapped her bottom lip between her teeth, too late, but to her surprise, one corner of Declan’s mouth lifted.
“Sure enough. But I’ve slept on worse.”
“Yeah, me, too,” Tess admitted, popping the locks on her SUV so he could get in while she got Jackson re-situated in his car seat. “You’ve never really lived until you’ve nodded off on an examining table in the morgue.”
“Belly of a C-17,” he countered. “In full gear.”
Tess couldn’t help it. She was impressed. “Nice. If they’re anything like the Chinooks the Army uses, then they’re loud as hell.”
Declan paused halfway through his seatbelt routine to stare at her. “You’re Army?”
“Was,” she corrected. “Reserves.” It had been the only way she could afford medical school. Not that she’d been unhappy about serving her country, either. Win-win. “It was a long time ago.”
He slanted a look she couldn’t decipher in her direction—he seemed to have a boatload of those, actually—and settled on a nod. “For me, too, I s’pose.”
Ah, hell. She’d never claimed to have much (fine. Any) tact, but his abrupt discharge from the Air Force had to be a sore spot.
Time to change the subject. “So, your new place is…uh, interesting.”
At least he gave up one of those sort-of smiles before saying, “Ah, come on now. You’re too honest for all that.”
“Fine,” she said. He wasn’t exactly off the mark. “I guess I’m just curious why you wouldn’t stay with Connor and Harlow. Unless you’ve got something against actual beds. And privacy. And—”
“Alright.” Declan lifted his hands in surrender, his inky biceps flexing against the sleeves of his T-shirt. “It’s not a palace.” Although it drained all of her patience to do it, Tess waited him out until he added, “In fact, it was the only place available for the next two months, and believe me, I looked everywhere. But I can’t stay with Connor and Harlow.”
“Because?”
He shrugged. “They just moved in together a few months ago. I’d be imposing.”
“Sorry, have you met those two?” Tess laughed. “They’re like, the nicest couple on the planet. Other than Charlie and Parker. And, well, Jonah and Nat.” Damn, all of her friends really were paired off rather happily. Crazy how lightning sometimes struck twice. Or, in this case, three times. “Anyway, I’m sure they wouldn’t think you’re imposing.”
“Ah. So, you’d stay with them for ten weeks, then? If you were me?”
“Of course I…” She realized it was a lie before she could finish. Serious health conditions barely ever mixed well with pride. Add in living with two friends who made their living as caregivers and would therefore unwittingly hover, and who had just moved in together, all happy-happy-kissy-face, on top of it? She’d probably take the shitty recliner option, too.
Still. “Okay. So, maybe I wouldn’t jump at the chance to bunk with Connor and Harlow if I were in your situation. But you’re not likely to get a whole lot of rest this way, either.”
“I’ll manage,” Declan said.
“It might take you a while to adjust to the meds in the trial,” Tess pressed. “Plus, there’s always the possibility for side effects. Fatigue. Nausea.” Maybe worse. Dealing with those alone could be difficult. Especially in a place where quality rest was about as likely as world peace.
If the look on his face was anything to go by, Declan remained unconvinced. “I read the paperwork. I know the risks.”
Tess tried again. “Look, I know this is difficult, but—”
“Do you?”
The question sailed all the way through her, even though he’d asked it quietly. Damn it. Just because she hadn’t meant to overstep didn’t mean she should blow off the burden of making this right.