Her body gripped him with the rhythmic pulse that signaled she was close, and his jaw clenched hard in his fight for control. He followed her every gasp and sigh, learning exactly what she liked, what made her crazy. And when those delicate hands moved down his body, from his shoulders to his arms to his back, clutching at him as if she needed to hold on…it satisfied him in a way he didn’t even want to contemplate.
She was incredible. Coming apart in his arms even as she begged him for more.
Hell, yes, there was more. A whole night’s worth of more. Payton didn’t want to be the good girl tonight, and after six months he needed to be bad.
5
Payton roused herself from a sated state of lethargy, peeling back her eyelids only to encounter a tangle of curls blocking her view. Shifting slowly, she reached up to shove the mess from her eyes—halting at the slow rise and fall of a chest beneath her cheek.
Nate.
She swallowed down the burst of joyous excitement as images, sensations and whispers of the night before bombarded her waking consciousness.
He’d been so gentle with her the first time. So careful. And then after that—
Her toes curled deep beneath the sheets at the thought of all they’d done.
Everything.
They’d made love, over and over again. Nate waking her with his hands, his mouth. A seductive growl accompanied by his rising need. Nothing planned. Nothing proper or polite about it.
Incredible.
“What’s got you smiling so early?” Nate’s morning-rough voice stroked over her like a soothing caress, bringing her attention to the hard line of his stubbled jaw and the soft amusement in his blue, blue eyes. They were intimately wound together. Arms and legs and bare skin everywhere. It felt good and, though today they wouldn’t be lovers, Payton wasn’t about to rush from the bed or give up the warmth of his body, the steady thump, thump of his heart sounding beneath her ear, or the shelter of his arms around her. She couldn’t. Not yet.
For now, they were comfortably entwined. Or at least they were until Nate reached down her back with one hand and pinched her bottom.
“Hey!” she squeaked, ineffectually trying to pinch back at skin too muscle packed to give.
“The grin. Tell.”
Inching her bum out of pinching distance, she raised a brow. “So desperate to feed your ego?”
“Mmm, so it’s an ego-feeding grin. Tell me more.”
She took a deep breath, weighing the temptation to share her indecent revelation. He’d never judged her before…but this was different. Telling in a way she wanted him to know but was afraid to reveal. After what they’d done last night, she might have finally killed the good girl misconception, and owning up to what had her smiling—the part beyond finally being in his arms—might negate all the progress she’d made. Casting a sidelong glance his way, to that devilish smile and waiting stare, the temptation proved too much to resist. Her eyes squeezed shut and she fessed up in a rush of breath. “I’m thinking you’re the first notch in my bedpost.”
There! That wasn’t so bad. It was freeing, in fact. And—
Her eyes blinked open as Nate froze beside her, every muscle in his body gone taut and his breathing at an abrupt halt.
Her chin pulled back. Not quite the “partner-in-crime” kind of response she’d hoped for.
He couldn’t be insulted. But now that she thought about it, she wouldn’t feel great about being described as a notch either.
“You weren’t a virgin.” The words rasped out more plea than question or statement.
Momentarily stunned, Payton could practically feel his cold dread at the thought she’d saved something so special for him. That the night he’d given her on condition it be casual be so spectacularly significant. That she’d deceived him.
“No!” Her hands flew to the sides of her face as she shook her head in vehement denial. “I wasn’t a virgin, I promise! I meant ‘notch’ like uncommitted. Sex for sex’s sake.” The beginning of her reckless adventure. He didn’t need to know how special being with him truly was to her. After today it would never be an issue again. She wouldn’t let it be. “Don’t panic, please.”
Nate’s relief was a palpable thing, like a rush of air back into the room, the return of pressure with a whoosh.
“I wasn’t panicking,” he scoffed, pushing to one elbow on his side. “Pretty little princesses don’t make me panic. Especially not when they are…” he lifted the sheet for dramatic effect, offering a quick leer at her prone body before meeting her eyes again “…naked.”
Relief washed through her at the ease with which he recovered, but a lingering tension remained and his expression turned serious. Concerned.
“Are you okay about this, Payton?” Catching a wild curl with his finger, he pushed it over her ear. Let his mouth pull into a crooked twist when it sprang free and bounced back in front of her eyes. “With last night being the only night?”
She took a steadying breath. “I am if we go forward as friends.”
In those first minutes after the kiss became real in the hallway, she might have indulged in a fantasy where there could be more. A little longing or hope. But she’d quickly understood it wasn’t a romance in the making. And though a part of her cared for Nate on a level she couldn’t acknowledge to him, there was another part of her excited by the raw rush of her very own too-good-to-feel-guilty-about night of passion. A night only he could give her. Because she trusted him.
“Friends,” he said as if testing the word out.
“Yeah. I’ve missed you in my life. I don’t want to give you up again.”
Tiny lines etched at the corners of his eyes as he held her stare. “Do you feel like you can go forward from here without this—” he waved a slow hand between them “—getting in the way?”
She knew she could. She’d done it for years before Nate walked out of her life. “I can if you can. Even if you can’t tell if you’ve got a virgin in your bed.”
Brows arching high as he let out a sharp laugh, Nate rocked back, pulling Payton over with him. “Be a while before I live that down, will it?”
She squinted at him from her perch atop his chest. “Probably.”
“Then I better steer this little chat back toward the ego feeding.” Settling against the pillow to get comfortable, he prompted, “So tell me how it is I score bedpost-notch status.”
Payton readjusted around him and let her gaze run the length of his pure masculine perfection, complete with one heavily muscled leg thrown over the sheet, and wondered how he could even ask.
“It’s just it was so…intense without being…serious. It wasn’t candlelight and promises of love everlasting.”
“You don’t like those things?” he asked, running a finger down the curve of her shoulder.
Guiltily she glanced away, then forced her gaze back. “No, I do. I’m sure I would—” If she ever actually felt that forever kind of glow, she would probably love it. If Nate had wanted to give her those things…
Only he didn’t and she knew it. The only thing everlasting in their future was the schoolgirl crush she expected would never quite go away. And a friendship if she was lucky. “What I mean is this was so…hot and it’s never been like that for me before. Impulsive. Exciting.” She felt the blush creeping into her cheeks—held Nate’s gaze anyway, needing him to understand. “No strings. No expectations.”