“The hole in his hand and the scar it will leave makes you anything but weak, Lil.”
“Then why beat the shit out of him?”
“So he fucking learns there’s an army at your back. Believe me, I showed restraint because he’s a brother.”
“Fine. Thanks.” I throw my hands up.
Narrowing his eyes on me, he huffs. “You want to tell me what happened to your grandparents’ place?”
“The fire?” I ask, lowering myself to my bed. The navy-blue comforter matches the plain painted walls.
There’s nothing pink in this room—no soft toys or doll houses. This is my space.
“Is there more than the fire?” he asks, dropping his brow.
“No. Jameson just told me about it, how do you already know?”
“I was there when Animals got the call.”
Gulping the beer, I offer a shrug of my shoulders. “Kids or squatters, I guess. I should have gotten rid of it years ago.”
“Where were you tonight?”
Placing the bottle on my bedside table, I chew the inside of my cheek to stop the angry retort wanting to bite at him.
“I’m only asking so I know if there’s any damage control I need to deal with.”
“I didn’t burn the place down, Ezekiel.” I roll my eyes and pull the duvet back, slinging it over my bare legs. “If you’re done playing dad, I’m tired.”
“Don’t be a brat. I’m looking out for you, not judging you.”
“I didn’t burn it down.” I puff out an exasperated breath. He stares at me, and I meet his eyes, putting more conviction in my tone. “I didn’t.”
“Okay. I believe you.” He holds up his hands in surrender. “I’ll let you get some sleep.”
As he turns for the door, I mumble, “Ezekiel…” he stills but doesn’t turn around, “thanks for always looking out for me.”
“You don’t need to thank me. We’re family.”
Emotion clogs my throat. “Hug Ruby for me, yeah?”
“You can hug her yourself tomorrow.”
The door closes with a soft click, and my body runs cold. Jumping up, I rush over and turn the handle, making sure it opens, my heart hammering against my ribcage. A slight breeze billows in, and my limbs relax. Shutting it again, I back up until my legs hit my bed. Ezekiel cares about me, and I have a family, but every night, I sleep with the light on and the door unlocked, my secrets sheltered away, rotting me from the inside out.
CHAPTER
ELEVEN
Zane/Chaos
“Leo, you up?” I call out when I get back to his house. Every light is on. The place practically glows from the outside.
He appears from the dining room, shirtless, blonde hair sticking up all over his head, a rag in his hand. “I’m up.”
“What are you doing?”
“Cleaning the mess.” I’ve been gone for hours. Cleaning shouldn’t have taken that long. “Is Lily okay?” He looks around, expecting to see her with me.
“She’s fine. Went back to the clubhouse, I think. It’s late. You should try to get some rest.”
“I can’t sleep.” He scrubs his hands down his face and paces the kitchen.
“You want me to crash here tonight?” Opening the fridge, I grab a carton of leftover Chinese from last night.
“No, I’m good.” He smacks his hand against his thigh, soap dripping from his hand to the floor, avoiding eye contact.
“Well, I’m going to watch some TV for a bit then I’ll go home.” He’s agitated and won’t settle for hours. I shouldn’t have left him earlier.
“Can you tell me when you’re going to get Kelly?” he asks, following me into the living room.
“Tomorrow evening.” I don’t know if we’ll execute the plan tomorrow, but we’ll be making one after visiting the club.
“I have this fucking feeling she’s dead.” He scrunches his face, shaking his head.
“Leo…” I dump the Chinese food on the coffee table and grasp his shoulders, trying to anchor him so he doesn’t spiral, “she’s fine. Soon, you’ll be off living life together. Breathe.”
Taking a couple deep breaths, he jerks his head. “Yeah, you’re right.” Sniffing me, he asks, “Why do you smell like smoke?”
I lift my shirt to my nose, shrugging. “Not important.”
Finally bringing his eyes to mine, he holds me there for a few seconds before blinking. “Okay. I’m going to go lay down.”
“Good. I’ll be right here.” I point to the couch I’m not looking forward to crashing on.
“Okay.” He disappears up the stairs. Despite this place having three bedrooms, I’ll never step foot on that staircase. I know Leo left it all untouched.
A picture of the past.
A museum.
Memories assault me. Hearing my mother cry. The sound of my dad kicking the shit out of her. The wait for the bedroom handle to drop when he needed someone else to beat.
Leo getting out of here will do him a world of good. The moment he takes off with Kelly, I’ll burn this place to the ground too.
Toeing off my boots, I throw my ass onto the couch and turn the volume up on the TV, re-runs of an old show flicking on the screen. Lily fills my head. Her story is so fucking dark, yet she came out on the other side, damaged but teeming with this life force I want to wrap myself in it.
The floorboard whines and creaks above my head as Leo paces his bedroom floor. It’s going to be a long night. Punching the sofa cushion, I put my head down and close my eyes for a second.
“Why did you do it!” Mom screams. Blood coats her hands. Her face distorts. She’s coming closer.
“Why did you put her out there?” Her voice is now a whisper. “Why?”
I jolt awake, my hands thrown up in defense. A shadow lingers over me. Startled, I scurry backward.
“Mom?” I croak, my voice still strained from sleep.
“Why did you do it?” the figure asks. I rub my eyes. Nope, still fucking there. Jumping to my feet, I stumble away from the thin, straggly-haired woman with my mother’s face.
“I don’t want to see her,” she cries.
“Leo,” I call up the stairs, my skin crawling. “Leo!” I bark.
Movement sounds, and he appears at the top of the stairs, stark naked, holding a gun. “What’s wrong?”
“Mom’s here.” A chill blows in from the wide-open front door, carrying leaves in with it.
Thudding down the stairs, Leo frowns, shaking his head at me. “Did you say Mom?” Following my stare, he slaps the gun against my chest, dropping it and going over to her.
“Mom, how the hell did you get out of there?” He sits her down and pulls a blanket from the back of a chair, wrapping it around his waist.
“Meadow Fields?” I scratch the back of my neck pinching there to make sure I’m not asleep.
“I’ve been detoxing her here.”
Leo confesses and my brain explodes. “What the fuck, Leo?”
“No. I’m not going back there, I see her.” Her words gain in pitch, and she pushes Leo away. We haven’t seen each other in almost two years. By the looks of her, you’d think it’s been twenty. Her hair is gray. Stress lines cut into her features. There’s a tooth missing in the front row of her mouth. She’s a mess.