“In the backpack.” He rubs my back with his palm. “Driver had the heat cranked in the car. Must’ve been freezing.”
“Sean!” My younger siblings barrel into us in a coordinated attack. Mia shoves me out of the way and leaps into Sean’s arms. Ben tries to be more manly about it, but ends up hugging Sean fiercely around the waist.
Sean ruffles Ben’s hair. “Who are you, and what have you done with Mia and Ben? Say the code and prove your identities.”
Ben doesn’t miss a beat. “I hate math.”
“I never want to read a book again.” Mia can’t say it without laughing.
Sean bundles them all in through the door, and I close it behind us. “I can’t believe you got taller without my permission. Is your hair redder, Mia? I didn’t tell you to do that, either.”
Mia hops down. “I didn’t tell you to get bigger muscles.”
He shrugs, eyes bright. “Hazard of the job.” Sean runs his hand through dark hair the same color as mine and glances around. “Hey, nice place.”
“It is nice.” Ben sticks his hands in his pockets. “How long are you staying?”
“A week, unless I get called back earlier, and the odds of that are—”
“Excellent,” Mia sighs.
Sean meets my eyes over their heads with a look that says who the hell paid for this?
“We can give you a tour,” Ben starts.
“But the city has even more stuff.” Mia’s expression is serious. She has a plan. “We haven’t seen most of it because, you know, we don’t have that much money, but we’re going to see everything eventually. From the bus, we saw a sign that said—”
“—there was a museum just for math.” Ben’s face brightens. “We thought we could do that another time. What we really want to do is go to the zoo.”
“Please.” My little sister’s tone goes deadly serious. “Will you please take us to the zoo?”
Sean raises his eyebrows. “Right now?”
“Yes. They have groundhogs, Sean. Groundhogs.”
“You’re both wearing pajamas.” Sean says. “You get dressed, and I’ll take you to the zoo.”
Ben grabs Mia’s arm and they walk-race to their bedroom. “Yes,” he murmurs under his breath. “We’re finally going to get to see those things.”
Their bedroom door shuts, and Sean turns to me, his eyebrows basically at his hairline. “Bristol, what is going on? Where’s Dad?”
My stomach sinks. “I don’t know.”
“So you just…what? Adopted them?”
“He’ll come back.”
Sean rolls his eyes. “Sure he will. When he runs out of money.”
“Yeah.” A flutter of panic rustles in my chest. “I already had to bail him out once.”
“You mean when the roof caved in?”
I don’t want to tell him the whole story, but it’s inevitable—the twins will say something, and I’ll have to explain. Might as well do it now while we have a moment of peace. “He was in deep with some loan shark people in the city, so I went to my boss at my old job. He helped me out.”
Sean covers his eyes with his palm. “This was before the roof?”
“Yeah. Dad took off when that happened. And when my boss found out about our situation, he was worried about it. He had the place redone. That’s why it’s so nice.”
He takes his hand down and levels me with a look. “You’ve got yourself a sugar daddy.”
“I definitely do not.”
“So you didn’t have sex with him?” My face heats. There’s no way to hide it from Sean. “Jesus, Bristol.”
I cross my arms over my chest. “First of all, I can sleep with whoever I want, and you don’t get to judge me for it.”
“I’m not judging you.” He puts both hands up. “I’m just saying, it explains the apartment remodel that looks like it costs fifty thousand dollars, even though this place is a five-dollar complex.”
“And second of all, it’s over.”
“The sugar-daddy situation?”
“The job, asshole. He’s not my boss anymore. I’m handling things here.”
“For how long?”
“Here’s the good news. Normally, you’d have to sleep on the couch, but since Dad’s gone, you can use his room. There’s a new bed and everything.”
Sean sighs. “We have to talk about this.”
“There’s not much to talk about. I’ve got a job. The apartment is decent. The twins—”
“Bris, you can’t do this forever. It’s your life, too.” I open my mouth to argue. “But. If we’re going to the zoo, then I should shower and change first. I’m sure the bathroom’s nice.”
I slap his bicep. “It’s really nice. Come on.”
Sean heads into the bathroom with a low whistle. I get a towel and washcloth and push them into his hands. He runs a palm over the cloth. “Fancy.”
“I should have given you a potholder.” I shut the door on him, then lean against the wall.
The twins’ voices float out from their bedroom. They’re putting together a plan for the visit.
“I don’t care about the lions.” Mia. A drawer opens, then closes.
“I still want to see them. It doesn’t matter as long as we go to the groundhogs first.”
“That’s what I said.”
It’s all okay. Good, even. Sean’s here and the twins are happy.
My heart races anyway. The situation feels out of control. How long can this calm last? Not long, if the rest of our lives has been any indication. I’m so firm with Sean about the twins because on some level, he’s right. If I keep them with me until they’re ready to leave home, it means my life isn’t my own.
I’ll never regret taking care of them. They’re my siblings, and I love them. I know what it meant to lose my mother. I’m not going to put them through that again because I have dreams of my own.
It’s just that I can imagine getting to the other side of this. I can imagine feeling like I’d missed something. Feeling like I’d have to start from scratch, except I’d be years behind schedule.
My phone buzzes in my pocket. Will.
No. I pull it out, and the number for the shitty new temp agency is on the screen. Weekend calls are almost never good.
I answer it anyway. “This is Bristol.”
“Hello, Ms. Anderson. I’m calling because—”
“Listen, I know you said this is the only job you have.” I don’t know what’s gotten into me. The racing-heart, out-of-control feeling or my brother showing up or the idea of my dad being gone forever. “But Mr. Malcom is such a creep. I honestly think he’ll try something if I keep working there. Is there anywhere else you can send me?”
A beat of silence. “Well. I would think that anyone in your position would be grateful to have any job, especially one that pays such a fair wage. You’re probably misinterpreting his interest in you.”
“He stared at my boobs for a full forty-five seconds the last time I was in the office.”