He swiped at one of her tears with his thumb. She cried so rarely that it was a novelty to see tears like this.
“Ye took me by surprise is all. That and—”
He didn’t speak, waited for her to go on. But she didn’t need to say anything. He knew her so well that he understood without hearing the words. “No one has ever said that to you before. Christ, Jenny, I should have said it before.”
“I didn’t know I needed ye to say it,” she answered, her voice low. “Now I feel like I should say it.”
He smiled. “Only if you want to.” But he suddenly needed the words too. He needed them more than he ever might have believed.
“Oy, well, in that case.”
“Jenny,” he groaned, and she laughed, though it came out as something of a sob.
“I love ye, Aidan. I love ye with all my ‘eart and soul.” She began to sob, and he held her tighter.
“Why are you crying now?”
“Because I love ye and ye’ll leave me.”
He laughed. “Don’t be ridiculous. I’ll never leave you.” But the back of his neck prickled as he spoke because he was always thinking of ways to get out of here. He wanted to take Jenny with him, but he didn’t know if she’d go.
She looked up at him. “Promise?”
“Promise.” He bent to kiss her lightly, to seal the promise, but when her mouth met his, there was more there than sweetness. There was a sensuality that made his blood heat and his heart pound. His breathing quickened, but he didn’t rush to grasp at her breast or use his tongue. He felt differently about her, about this act, tonight. They’d finally figured out how to copulate successfully, and they both enjoyed it now. Tonight, was different, though.
He loved her, and she loved him. He wanted to show her how much he loved her. Show her that he was hers forever.
Their kisses seemed to go on and on, their hands exploring even as their mouths did the same. He couldn’t undress her, not here in the open, but he revealed and then covered until he had explored all of her and left her panting for more. She was as eager to touch him, but for once he was able to control his desire, so he did not come as soon as her hand slid into his trousers. He sought the heat of her hand and then of her body, and when he’d slid into her, the pleasure was dark and lovely. He didn’t race to climax this time, but savored the feel of her, the taste of her mouth on his, the way she moved beneath him. When she gasped, he repeated the action until she gasped again.
“That,” she said, her voice sounding so unlike the Jenny he knew. “Do that again.”
He’d complied, feeling her muscles clench as she began to soar. He soared with her, following her up, finding a little slice of heaven in the hell on earth that was their daily lives. He pulled out at the last minute, of course. It was painful to do so as her body was clenching him tightly and she was making such delicious sounds of contentment, but they couldn’t risk a child.
Afterward, Aidan had gathered her in his arms and held her tightly. “No wonder men pay for that,” she said after a while. “I never understood before.”
“Neither did I.”
His belly rumbled and she patted his back. “Try to forget it and sleep.”
She fell asleep a few minutes later. She could always sleep, but the hunger and the mixture of emotions he felt kept Aidan awake. He listened to her soft, even breaths and knew that he should be happy. He had everything he needed. But like Jenny who was always collecting small treasures, Aidan wanted something more. He didn’t want to spend the rest of his nights sleeping on roofs or under bridges or in abandoned buildings. He wanted to know when his next meal would be. He wanted coin in his pocket.
He wasn’t a child any longer, at the mercy of others. He was sixteen and a grown man. He had to find a way to get out of Spitalfields. He’d do whatever it took.
IV
“Oy!” Jenny spun around, leaving the rotting produce in the bin behind her and crouching, ready for battle. “I ‘ave a message for ye.”
Jenny pointed to her chest.
“No. ‘Im.” The publican pointed to Aidan. She glanced at Aidan, tall and lanky with a mop of dark hair and eyes so dark sometimes even she had trouble reading his expression. But she had no trouble now. He looked wary.
“We’re just looking for scraps,” he said defensively. “If we don’t take it, the dogs will.”
“This isn’t about the rubbish,” the publican said. “I got a message for ye. From a nob.”
Aidan’s brow lowered, and he glanced at Jenny. She shrugged. She didn’t know any nobs. But Aidan always said his father was a lord. The Earl of Cranbourne, he said. She didn’t doubt him, but she didn’t exactly believe him either.
“Wot’s the message?” Jenny asked because Aidan seemed frozen, and the silence had gone on too long.
“The nob says come to Cranbourne ‘Ouse. Yer uncle wants to see ye.” The publican went back inside, leaving Aidan and Jenny alone in the stinking yard with the rubbish.
“Yer uncle?” she said, finally. “Is that the earl now?”
He nodded. “When my father died, my mother tried to reach him, but he wouldn’t see her. We went to the house, but his servants turned us away. She even went to his solicitor’s office, but...” His cheeks colored, and she knew whatever had happened had mortified the young boy.
“Why does ‘e want to see ye now?” she asked.
“I don’t know.”
“Are ye going?”
“I don’t know.”
Fear gripped her. She didn’t want him to go. If he went to this Cranbourne House, she’d lose him. She knew that without any doubt whatsoever. Aidan had never belonged in the rookeries. He’d always been destined for more. Now was his chance. She should be happy for him. But she was selfish. She didn’t want to lose him.
For days, he said nothing of the message, and the two of them went on as they always did. But she should have known that wasn’t the end of it. She wasn’t the kind of girl who got happy endings.
Two or three weeks after that night under the bridge—the night when he’d told her he loved her, when he’d said he would never leave—Aidan had looked at her, and she knew what he would say. “I have to go see my uncle,” he said.
“No, ye don’t,” she argued. “Ye can stay ‘ere. ‘E’ll never find ye. If ‘e could, ‘e wouldn’t ‘ave left word at the pub.” He’d left word at several pubs and a number of publicans had passed on the message now.
“Jenny,” Aidan said softly. “I want to see my uncle.”
It was dark and they were lying on the banks of the Thames, looking up at the few stars they could see. The night was warm, but they’d been lying close together, listening to the lapping water and the distant sounds of taverns and ships on the river.
She turned her head sharply. “Why? All those years ago, ‘e didn’t want to see ye.”
“He wants to now. Maybe he wants to take me in. Maybe he’ll give me money.”
“Yer that eager to leave me?” She sat and hugged her knees.