“Actually, I think, if I were the driver,” she said, “it would make it even worse.”
He looked at her and then said, “Maybe. Do you want me to park somewhere else?”
“No,” she said, “I want to deal with this and get it over with.”
Just enough firmness in her tone confirmed she was telling the truth. So often people presented this false sense of bravado, just to make sure they could get through something, but she really wanted to try getting through this, even if she failed. She wanted to find a way to get to the other side.
She watched as he pulled in and went up to the second level. As luck would have it, the very same spot she had parked in was open, and he pulled right in.
She sucked in her breath and said, “And, of course, you had to do that.”
“Yep, you said you wanted to get it over with,” he said, with a gentle smile.
She nodded, opened up her side, and hopped out. She looked around at all the vehicles, and many of them were likely different cars and people than when she had been here earlier today. As she had been dealing with her injuries, nobody else had even been aware. Nobody else had even been close to being aware. They had all moved on; whereas she was the one dealing with whatever garbage was still in her head. She shook her head and smiled at Noah, as he walked to the tailgate and looked at her.
“I’m fine,” she said. “Just another one of those realizations, you know? That what you think is so important, so major, and so traumatic, but the rest of the world isn’t even aware of—and wouldn’t care about it, if they were.”
“That’s because they’re so struck by what’s important and traumatizing in their own world,” he explained quietly.
“And I get that, and it’s funny because I’m not even thinking about what they’re going through, but I’m automatically assuming they don’t care about me.”
“I think we’re all just human,” he said. “So don’t be so quick to judge yourself or others and just realize that we all do the best we can.”
“Maybe,” she said, “but you have to take a hard look once in a while to see the differences in the world around you.”
“Agreed,” he murmured. He held out a hand, and, without thinking, she linked her fingers with his and walked at his side.
“You’re a nice man.”
“That’s funny. Just a little while ago,” he said, with a sideways grin, “you were snapping at me, like a turtle.”
She snorted. “Well, that turtle comment better not have anything to do with my figure,” she said, “or I’ll really get you for it.”
“Absolutely not,” he said, with a straight face. “It was entirely duty or, ah, … shall we say attitude?”
She rolled her eyes. “Something about you tends to bring out something I’m not really used to seeing in me.”
“What, spice?”
“I wonder if that’s what it is,” she said. “I just haven’t had anyone around me who changed my outlook on life, but you are managing to do that.”
“Well, maybe that’s a good thing.”
“Maybe, but I didn’t say that change was easy.”
“It’s not easy. It’s not comfortable, and it’s not terribly nice, but, on the other side of change, it always looks much better.” She smiled. The two of them headed to the elevator, and, when they got inside, he punched the button for the lobby.
“I think we can go straight up to my room from here,” she said.
“You don’t want to check for any messages?”
“Do people still do that?” she asked in wonder.
“I don’t know,” he said. “You tell me.”
She shrugged. “I’ve never done it before, and we all have cell phones now.”
“Maybe so.”
As they got to the lobby, he looked at her, and she shrugged and said, “Fine. Is this your instinct kicking in or something?”
“Nope, but I wouldn’t mind checking out the lay of the place, so I can see just what we’re up against.”
Not really sure she liked his logic or his reasoning, she led the way into the lobby. “See? It’s just one of those lovely big hotel lobbies. They’re the same all over the world. They’ve got lots of little bits of seating scattered among discreet little palms or other fake trees that you sit beside and look out, as you wait for things to happen.”
“I always wondered what people were waiting for.”
“Usually shuttle rides,” she said, “or taxis or other people to arrive. Personally I never found it a comfortable place to stay. I don’t think they’re really geared for that. At least not for me.”
“I don’t think I ever have either,” he said thoughtfully, “and I’ve traveled a lot.”
She turned around and pointed at the elevators and asked, “Can we go up to my room now?”
He nodded. “Would you mind taking the stairs?”
She shrugged and headed toward the stairs, with him in tow. When he opened the door, and they were inside the stairwell, she looked around and said, “It’s a bit more isolated here, isn’t it?”
“A little more but not too bad.” They slowly climbed up the stairs. “What floor?”
“Five.”
He nodded and kept on going.
“I clearly didn’t think this through,” she said, lagging a little bit. “Man, you have me so flustered.”
“Ha. Hardly,” he said. “It’s got nothing to do with me. It’s all about this scenario that you’ve still not quite got your head around.”
“I guess,” she muttered, as she kept climbing. “But a lot of stairs are here.”
“We can take the elevator for the last few if you want.”
“Then what will you do for exercise?”
“I’ll make a trip down the stairs later.”
“Oh no, you don’t,” she said. “I’m not a quitter.” He just smiled. She groaned and said, “You did that on purpose, didn’t you?”
His grin widened, and he said, “Come on. I’ll race you to the top.”
She looked at him in shock. “That’ll never happen.” But he was already running up the stairs. She followed, letting him go on ahead, but still cutting the time by half. By the time she got to the top of the stairs, she was pleasantly surprised that she was not out of breath. He looked at her approvingly.
“Now do that every day,” he said, “and we’ll really get you into shape.”
“No thanks,” she said. “There’s in shape, like me,” she said, “which is normal and average, and then there’s in shape, like Ice, a lean, mean cutting machine.”
“Very true,” he said, with a nod. “And you don’t need to be quite that fit.”
“No, but it’s not necessarily something I shouldn’t be either.”
“It’s Ice’s lifestyle, her body type, and it’s how she is happy to be physically. She likes to be at the optimum level of her own fitness.”
“Athletic fitness is not something that I’m really so crazy about,” she said. “Now natural foods, supplements, and all that good stuff, yes. General fitness, yes. But I don’t want to go nuts with it, and I certainly don’t want it to dominate my life.”