Despite him trying to remain calm and unfazed, I could still see the slight clench of his jaw and the vein on his neck protruding as his gaze shifted back to Erin.
I imagined her eyes were wide as saucers as she continued to type away.
“You can go to your office, Erin.”
“No, no, no…” I intervened in a high-pitched tone. “I prefer she stay and cite our entire conversation. I would hate for anything to be taken out of context, especially when we’re discussing the negotiations of your contract.”
“There are no negotiations. You either take it or leave it.”
“I think you should follow your own advice,” I snidely baited. “I forgot how good it felt to have orgasms. I came over and over again. And trust me, Mr. Locke, there was no mistaking my orgasms this time. My soaking wet sheets speak for themselves. Please do apologize to your cleaning crew for me.”
His jaw tightened again. “I’ll relay the message, Miss Troy.”
“Great.”
“Well, given your night of satisfaction, did you have time to go over my contract?”
“Of course, Mr. Locke. Unlike you, I love mixing business with pleasure,” I lied. I never did. I just wanted to get a rise out of him. “I guess you could say it’s how I’ve gotten this far. Ask around since you know all the right people. Yet, you probably don’t have to since you’ve had a taste of me yourself.”
“I’ve had more than a taste, sweetheart.”
“Did you get that, Erin?” I looked at her. “Make sure you accentuate ‘more than a taste.’ I believe it’s against company policy to fuck an employee.”
“Autumn, that’s enough.”
“But, Julian…” I leaned against his desk and pressed my breasts together, giving him one hell of a view. I wasn’t wearing a bra. “We’re just getting started, sweetheart.”
“Leave us,” he demanded, his eyes now cold and calculated. “Now.”
Erin didn’t have to be told twice. She practically hauled ass toward the door and out of his office.
“Just out of curiosity, how many assistants do you go through in a month? I’m going to assume maybe one a week?”
“Erin has been with me for three years.”
“She seems awfully shy and submissive. Huh, I guess that would work well for you, though. I imagine she’s always ready on her knees for you.”
“My assistant doesn’t get on her knees for me, kid, but you sure as fuck can.”
“I thought you don’t mix business with pleasure, Mr. Locke?”
“For you…” He paused to let his words sink in. “I would.”
“Is that supposed to make me swoon? I’m immune to your bullshit lines. I’ve heard them all before.”
“Autumn—”
I threw the contract on his desk in front of him. “I highlighted what I agree to, scratched out what I don’t, and added my own terms. If you don’t like it, I’ll walk right out of this office and never look back. I may need you, but you need me too. Unlike the eighteen-year-old girl you fucked over, I know my worth now. I won’t let you use me again. I shouldn’t have let it happen the first place, but I was young and stupid.”
Every time I thought about how I’d let him use me the anger seared throughout my entire body. After years of trying to get over him, I finally did, and now all those painful emotions were tearing into me once again.
I hated that I was letting him get to me, but he knew how to push all of my buttons. Determined to not allow him to win, I went in for the kill, knowing how to use his ambition to my advantage.
“You want to be number one on the market, and I’m the woman to get you there. Because mark my words, Julian, without me, you’ll fail.”
It was my turn to pause. I wanted him to really listen to what I was saying. He needed to understand this was a two-way street—we needed each other to advance in our careers.
I gave it a few more seconds before adding, “If we’re going to make our working relationship succeed and flourish, then you’re going to have to give me an inch.”
“If I give you an inch, you’ll take a mile.”
“Everything I have planned for you in the next week is solely for the benefit of your company. I know you didn’t come this far to stop now. You’re going to have to trust me on this. This has to be a team effort if we’re going to work together effectively.”
For a moment he just sat there staring at me, and if I wasn’t already sitting down, I probably would have fallen on my ass when he declared, “You want the man I was ten years ago, and he’s not here anymore, Autumn. He died the day I left you.”
“You’re wrong,” I countered, trying like hell not to let his words get to me. “He’s just lying dormant inside of you. But this isn’t about us. We were never an us, and it took me a long time to realize that. You were my brother’s best friend, and I was just a stupid kid who thought her life began and ended with you. I don’t hate you, Julian. At least not anymore. The truth is… I feel absolutely nothing for you.”
He winced. It was quick, but I saw it.
“But from one successful person to another, I do respect the hell out of what you’ve built, and the world needs to know how far you’ve truly come. You know firsthand what it’s like to grow up in the system, and there are still millions of kids who need to know that being dealt a shitty hand in life doesn’t determine who they are and what they’re capable of. It doesn’t define them like it didn’t define you. You had my father as a role model, and now here’s your chance to pay it forward.”
“How is your father?”
“I’m not here to discuss my family with you. If you want to know about them, their phone numbers haven’t changed.”
He didn’t just leave me behind—he abandoned my entire family.
Including my brother.
The only difference between me and them was that he actually said goodbye to me. My family had spent years grieving the loss of a best friend and a son.
I could see the remorse on his face—he didn’t try to hide it. He wanted me to see there was still a part of the man I used to know living inside of him.
For the first time since we saw one another again, I felt as if I was finally getting through to him. Making my emotions run wild with feelings I thought were gone when it came to him.
I shoved them aside, refusing to go down that road again.
“Did you practice that pitch, kid?”
“No,” I simply stated. “I spoke from my heart.”
Which scared me more than anything.
—Julian—
The times when I’d let my mind contemplate the past and what I must have put her family through were some of the darkest moments of my life. To hear her confirm how much I’d hurt her wasn’t something I was prepared for, and I’d be full of shit if I said I didn’t want to continue talking about us.
But this wasn’t the time or place.
The new contract I had drawn up would allow me to have the time I wanted with her where we could do exactly that.
Instead of insisting that this conversation was far from over, I peered down at the contract, looking through each page to see what she had in mind.