Jude shifted a little closer, and Kicks felt a sudden urge to drag him into his lap and make him forget his fear through his dick. But he wasn’t brave enough for that, even if Jude made him feel absolutely fucking reckless and absolutely weak. “I like that. I think that’s what Eliah did. It’s probably why he likes your boss…”
“President,” Kicks murmured absently.
Jude huffed a laugh. “I’ll figure you all out eventually. Just give me time.”
It almost sounded like a threat, and Kicks had always been the kind of man who acted on those. He looked Jude in the eyes, then reached out a hand and brushed the tips of his fingers over the top of his ears where his curls rested. “You got some time—but not a lot.”
“Kicking me out already?” Jude asked, his voice so low Kicks had to strain forward to hear it.
“Not yet.” The words tumbled from his lips, and the moment between them felt charged. “I never asked if you…” He started to pull his hand back, but Jude’s shot up, his fingers an iron grip around his wrist.
“Yes,” Jude said. “If you’re asking if I like to fuck men, the answer is yes. I’m rather not fussed about gender.”
Kicks swallowed thickly and turned his wrist, but Jude had no intention of letting him go. “This is a bad idea.” He knew he was trying to convince himself, because years of chosen celibacy were crumbling into dust at the heated touch against his skin.
He wanted. Fuck, he wanted.
“It doesn’t need to be,” Jude said, then leaned in and bit the inside of Kicks’ wrist. “What better way to pass the time than mutual orgasms.”
“Jesus, fuck me.” The word tumbled from his lips, a little thoughtless, a lot desperate. His dick was so hard it hurt, and he knew it was over. The rabbi had won. His defenses were down, and there was no turning back.
Jude’s grin widened, then in a flash, he was on his feet and straddling Kicks, pressing him back hard against the sofa. “Something like that. I’m assuming you don’t have condoms or lube though.”
Kicks’ brow raised, but his voice came out hoarse and needy. “Wasn’t on my list of supplies, sorry.”
“And you made me throw my case away,” Jude said.
Kicks’ cheeks went hot. “You didn’t consider those important?”
Jude laughed and leaned in, brushing his nose along the side of the other man’s. “Not as important as pants. It’s fine though. I’m a bit too old to take it up the ass with spit-lube, but I’ve had years of experience finding clever ways to get off.”
“Have you?” Kicks rasped. His fingers trembled as he fought for purchase in Jude’s shirt.
Jude pulled back a little, and his brow was furrowed as he stared down at Kicks’ hands. “Are you…bloody hell, you’re not a virgin?”
Kicks moved to shove him off, but Jude clung too tight that all Kicks managed was to jostle him a little. It made their dicks rub together harder, and his face went even hotter. “No, but it’s been a goddamn long time. Does that bother you?”
Jude shrugged. “No, but I can be gentle if you need me to be.”
Rolling his eyes because he didn’t want to let himself feel how tender those words were, Kicks lifted a hand to Jude’s face and nearly missed before his palm dropped to the man’s cheek. He’d been without real depth perception for so many years, he almost didn’t notice anymore, but the man was throwing him off his game entirely. He managed to drag his fingers into Jude’s hair, twisting into his curls, and he tugged hard before the other man went down for a kiss.
It was messy and a little sour from the canned pot pie ingredients. And it was awkward because neither of them understood each other’s rhythm, and for Kicks, it had been so fucking long.
And it was also fucking amazing. Jude’s tongue was pushy, just like the man himself. He licked over the seam of Kicks’ closed lips, then plunged inside like he wanted to taste every inch of him.
“Fuck,” Kicks mumbled around the kiss. His hands fell to Jude’s hips, dragging him closer, feeling the throbbing hardness behind the zipper of his jeans. He was aching to go further, and a little afraid because he didn’t want this to mean more or less than it should.
Pulling back, Jude’s breathing was a little hitched, but he put one hand on Kicks’ shoulder and held it there. “Emilio.”
It was the first time maybe in his entire life that Kicks liked the sound of his name on someone else’s lips. He tasted Jude on his tongue, and his dick throbbed again. “I still think this is a bad idea.”
“Is your bo—your President—going to be upset about it if he finds out we did this?” Jude asked.
Kicks lifted his hand and traced a line around Jude’s lips, which were red and slick with spit. “No.”
“So, what’s the worry? Unless you don’t want me, and if that’s the case, I swear I’ll back off.” The pure and utter honesty in Jude’s words were almost like a physical blow, and Kicks had to force himself not to react.
There was no world in which he didn’t want this man—to touch every inch of him, to let Jude pin him down and take whatever he wanted. And Smokey sure as shit wouldn’t care so long as they got back safe.
And so fucking what if it had been a long time. He knew better than to give Jude any real power. He liked the guy—he was attracted to the guy, but he wasn’t going to fall in love. He wasn’t stupid enough to fall in love.
“I guess nothing,” he finally said, trying to sound casual as he reached up and tangled his fingers in the back of Jude’s hair, tugging hard. He thrust his hips up gently when Jude let out a soft groan and ground down hard against his lap.
“I want your cock out right now,” Jude said, turning his head to mouth at the edge of Kicks’ jaw. “And I want you stroking mine. I’m not going to come in my pants like some teenager.”
Kicks couldn’t help his laugh, couldn’t help the way he loosened his grip on Jude’s hair as he turned and kissed him again. He let Jude’s lips and tongue control it, to set the pace, to set the rhythm. He felt calm in ways he couldn’t describe, letting go a little bit to this pressing, biting mouth.
He didn’t fight when Jude shifted back or when his clever hands pulled apart buttons, dragged down zippers. And his breath left him in a rush when a hot, dry palm closed around his cock and began to stroke him.
“You’re not cut,” Jude breathed out, increasing the pressure as he stroked down, exposing all of Kicks.
Kicks looked down, then let out a wheezing laugh. “Uh. No.”
“I love that.” Jude stopped and gave him a considering look. “I want to suck you off.”
Kicks almost choked, his hips fucking forward against the other man’s hand. “I’m sure as shit not going to stop you.”
The smile Jude gave him after that would have been enough to send him spilling if he was a man with weaker control over his body. As it was, his dick pulsed, and precome dribbled from the tip, but he was holding on.
Jude wasted no time slipping to his knees, but before he got to work, he grabbed Kicks by the wrists and spread his arms apart. “Hold here and do not move.”