I closed my eyes and held onto the window frame. Tears squeezed out of the corners of my eyes. Alistair had left me so broken that when a gorgeous man wanted to claim me, I panicked instead of embracing it.
For a second, I allowed myself to dream of a world where I’d met Wilder first, where he had been my true mate.
But even that was terrifying to think about with how damaged Alistair had left me.
If I was being honest with myself, I didn’t know that I could ever be connected so closely to anyone again. I didn’t know that I could ever allow myself to lose my control. I didn’t know that I could ever let myself go enough to give Wilder…or Daxon the connection they seemed to be looking for.
Of course I realized the hypocrisy of my vagina desperately wanting Wilder’s body, yet the mention of being bonded left me shaken.
Every time I thought of Wilder, I melted. When he kissed me, I was ready to destroy the world to remain in his arms. But for our souls to be entwined, the very essence of who we were to merge, was a very different matter. One that I wasn’t sure was possible, or if I wanted to go through with again.
I wiped my cheeks, more confused than ever. Maybe what I needed was fresh air, to get out of the room that felt like it suffocated me.
As I grabbed fresh clothes from my dresser, my mind still replayed images of Wilder coming into my room and ravaging me. Why couldn’t he be like every other asshole out there and just be interested in great sex? That sounded much safer to me.
I buttoned up my jeans and pulled on a faded blue blouse with long sleeves. The neckline was so loose, it hung over a shoulder. Luckily, I had recently bought a strapless bra from the local store in town and could pull it off. Taking another quick look at myself in the mirror, I decided I looked relatively normal and as non threatening as I could make myself in preparation for crossing paths with locals.
I pushed my white-blonde hair into a ponytail, with a few loose strands framing my face, then I stepped outside my room and headed downstairs. Night had crawled into the hallway, and it seemed especially quiet.
Downstairs, the inn was empty. Not a soul in sight…well, except for Jim, who owned Lair Inn.
“Evening, Rune,” he greeted me from behind the bar he was wiping down. “Are you hungry? There’s some of Carrie’s Irish lamb stew left.” His smile warmed me and had always made me feel safe from the first day I stumbled into his establishment.
My stomach growled on cue, and I laughed at how loud it sounded. “Apparently, I’m very hungry.” Then I glanced to both ends of the bar. Chairs and tables were everywhere, the windows and door shut, but not a soul in sight. “I’m surprised it’s so quiet here,” I said, remembering how packed the inn got only a few nights ago, which also ended in a huge brawl between Daxon and Wilder.
“Most are at the town hall tonight. Carrie’s down there too.”
I met Jim’s green eyes, the light overhead brightening his short, silver hair, giving him a soft expression, but there was no denying the shadow behind his gaze.
“Is there a convention in town?” I teased, but as the words left my mouth, I couldn’t help but wonder if it had everything to do with Eve’s death yesterday. Were they talking about me and how to kick me out of town? Were they going to send a mob after me?
I obviously had a really active imagination.
My heart lunged into my ribs, the earlier grief and worry colliding through me, and my fingers trembled as they caught the bottom of my shirt nervously.
Jim’s brow narrowed. “Sit and I’ll bring you some food. It will do you good.”
The thought of food made me sick suddenly. To know that so many people were together, likely talking about me, felt like a blade twisting in my gut. And why didn’t Wilder tell me about it earlier…? I could only assume the meeting was a last-minute decision.
“Thank you, but I don’t think I could eat a thing right now.” Maybe it was all in my head, a figment of my imagination, but as I lifted my gaze to Jim once more, the worry on his face confirmed my worst fears. “I need to go,” I said and turned away from him hastily, hurrying for the door. No matter what everyone thought, I had a right to defend myself.
“Rune,” Jim called out behind me, and I looked over my shoulder at him. “I don’t believe you were responsible for Eve’s death. But sometimes, fear and panic make people desperate and jump to conclusions. Be careful out there, as not everyone is thinking straight right now.”
I swallowed the lump in my throat and gave him a quick nod, unable to find my words. I slipped outside into the cool night that pressed in around me. For several long moments, I stood beneath the main inn lights, trying to catch my breath and calm my racing heart.
I’d only been in town for a few weeks, but I’d like to think I hadn’t come across as a major psycho. Despite that the locals were quick to believe I was capable of such a brutal attack. I shook my head in frustration.
Several long breaths, and I turned toward the main road, where the lights were bright and chased away shadows.
The town hall was located at the end of the main street, and as much as trepidation wormed its way through my gut, I never stopped heading in that direction. I practically ran there, my pulse on fire as anger brewed in my chest. Eve had meant something to me, I’d had no reason to kill her.
I passed row after row of closed stores, and even the coffee shop and diner were shut, which meant a lot as that place never seemed to close. My strides lengthened the more my mind imagined what I was about to find. A voice in my head was screaming at me that I was giving them the chance they were looking for to come after me.
I pushed the voice away.
I wanted the shifters living in this town to understand I wasn’t guilty. I could barely bring myself to harm a bug, and seeing as I couldn’t even change into my wolf, I had yet to experience my primal killing instincts that usually came with a wolf’s first shift.
Still, Jim’s warning swam in my head about people being irrational when they were upset.
Up ahead, the town hall rose into view, a dark brick building with a pointy roof the color of midnight covered in a generous topping of green lichen. Long arched windows gave the place an appearance of a long forgotten church, and maybe it had once been a place of worship before the wolves moved into the town of Amarok.
Bright light blazed from the windows, and I could see the shadows of all the people moving around inside. In the front yard, I froze, dragging my eyes over the front door that remained shut. Doubt crawled over me, telling me I should turn back. Before I could change my mind, I marched up the three stone steps to the grand double doors and placed my hand on the iron handle. I pressed my ear to the door. Voices escalated inside, but no particular one stood out for me to work out who exactly spoke.
Licking my lips, I pushed down the handle slowly and eased the door ajar before I peered inside. The room was packed. Rows and rows of chairs lined the large ballroom, all facing the front stage, where a tall, blond man I didn’t recognize stood, talking to the crowd quite angrily by the look of his shaking fist in the air. Nearly every chair was taken right to the back of the room, and I figured even if I tried to stealthy sneak inside now, I’d be spotted instantly.
I scanned the faces, recognizing Carrie from the inn right away, sitting by the far corner, but from my angle, it was hard to see her expression. Miyu and her boyfriend, Rae, sat toward the back. She had her arms folded across her chest, looking perturbed. Most townsfolk I recognized were scattered among the others I haven’t yet had the chance to meet.