"If that ain't the truth," Viktor casually muttered.
I pulled back purposely to give my bodyguard in question a look, and the sight of him made memories rush through my mind, which had me pouting. "Wow...okay. So, you're not just a hired assassin to watch over me."
Onyx pulled back then as Viktor slowly nodded.
"We have a lot to discuss, Willow."
"Right," I replied. I didn't have to turn my head to feel Neo's presence now from behind me as a warm cloth of black that shifted to red suddenly rested upon my shoulders. Onyx let me go - a sign of approval - as I turned to give Neo my full attention.
His eyes were open and burning with coursing energy as tiny red magic circles spun in place of his irises. It was hard to not get lost in their mesmerizing pull, but my focus remained on his expression, which didn't hide his multiple emotions now that he was in close vicinity.
"Sweetness," he began as he reached out to touch my cheek. "You just had to be an odd one, now didn't you?"
"If I wasn't, you wouldn't be interested in me, mate," I pointed out. "Who possibly wants a woman with one mate when she can be destined to have two?"
He snickered and shook his head.
"Something we can both agree upon." Very gently, he pulled me into his arms, and I gave into this moment to hug him like I knew everything about this man; his suffering within the world of darkness he viewed both in the depths of his sleep and in the peak hours of wakefulness.
I wondered if this bond could aid in his vision somehow, but in this prime moment of embraced affection, it didn't matter. What did matter was the wholesome feeling of tranquility that was surging through our funnelled connection.
Neo's emotions were a bit trickier to decipher because they moved with such fluidity that they really did mesh together like one flowing river. I could tell he was indeed shocked by the matter, but it was fair to say he was impressed with this new predicament.
His calmness was something he normally carried, so it felt rather comforting to pick up, and though I felt he was holding back, bits of anger were there, too. He was mad that he almost lost his destined mate, and that I played the lead role in that.
When we finished hugging, Onyx held me from behind, while my hands were still in Neo's. I looked to Neo first, hoping he'd sense my attention before lifting my head to look up at Onyx as he acknowledged I had something to say.
"I apologize," I whispered out of weakness, but made sure it was firm enough of an apology that they acknowledged this was being taken seriously. "I...I was tired. Tired of this constant cycle of mental ridicule. Exhausted from always doubting my worth in a pack that deserved a woman who could be one of them. Neither of you nor the pack made me feel inadequate, and though the incident from earlier may have finalized things...I...I'd been planning to end my life for a while."
I could feel their hurt, but I swallowed the lump in my throat and continued.
"It was selfish of me, I understand that, but I knew there would be no way of proving my worth after the confrontation with Dubai's group. I felt...ashamed, and though I knew Alpha Dimitris wasn't in control of those spoken words, I couldn't stop their repetition, and it only aided in my internal demise."
Lowering my head so I could look at my hands, which were being held tightly by Neo's, I shrugged. "It felt right when I did it...but I was reminded when I was sinking into those chilled waters what a fucking fool I was. All the years I’d worked upon myself to be better...do better and ignore the daily words of disgust for myself felt worthless in that moment. But what frightened me the most was accepting that I was losing everything I'd once wished for: being loved, being valued within a pack, my friends, and the family I created in this dark world. My actions would have made wounds that may have never healed, and for that, I'll receive whatever punishment you wish to give me."
The heavy silence was expected, but I didn't expect Neo to lift my head up with his hand beneath my chin.
"Your aura is more captivating when it's not shadowed by regret." His words made my eyes grow glassy, but I couldn't turn away as he inched in enough to brush his lips lightly against mine. The kiss was unexpected, and even at the light touch, the tingles it ignited were felt by both of us.
Unlike my buzzing self, Neo somehow managed to keep focused.
"Acknowledging what you did wrong means it won't happen again," he emphasized as if it were a hidden warning that I wouldn't dare try killing myself for what I guess was a third time. "However, you're not solely at fault. Circumstances encouraged it, and we should have fought to figure out what was troubling you before it led down this path."
The movement of footsteps drew my attention to Dimitris as he approached the three of us. Neo and Onyx seemed to move to stand by my sides. Neo ended up switching places with Onyx to stand on my left side while Onyx now stood to my right.
They didn't hesitate to hold my hands as if to take comfort in our newly formed connection while making a clear point to Dimitris that whatever he was plotting, they would endure it as well if it involved some sort of torture.
Compared to his taunting smirk from earlier, he was looking at me with seriousness while his aura grew almost competitively. I would have tried to fight against his dancing aura with my own, but I was far too exhausted to bother and my wolf didn't give two shits.
Was she observing Dimitris like a hawk? Yes. But his games of taunting me into accepting he was still Alpha of the Forbidden Pack weren't going to get a response from me. The bet about me taking over was more of a joke in my mind, but even with me winning the bet thanks to my awakened wolf, I had no desire to take the lead role.
Not when I have so much of myself I need to unravel.
I readied myself for his words, even fighting the tempting desire for my knees to buckle and the itching need to sleep, but he did something I never expected him to do.
He got down on one knee.
That had Neo and Onyx stiffening like statues, and I overheard Saint speaking to Jayce and Viktor. "Now I must be hallucinating. Y'all want to confirm what I'm seeing? Because in all my years, I've never seen our Alpha kneel to anyone."
"You're seeing correctly," Jayce muttered with a hint of disbelief.
"Well, if he's trying to propose, he better get the fuck up," Viktor grumbled with enough irritation it was hard not to laugh.
Dimitris gave Viktor a glaring look, but he returned his attention to me as he placed his hand upon his chest and bowed his head.
"I, Dimitris Moore, apologize for my earlier behavior," he declared. My jaw went slack as I stared down at him in disbelief. Lifting his head to see my obvious shock, he continued, "Neo's right. He's always been right, always spoken up on your behalf when you're not around. Time and time again, he told me to prove to you that we wished for your company. That no matter your shifter status, you belong to our pack. I failed at showing you that, and regardless of the power controlling me earlier, it's no excuse. My words, words from your Alpha, stabbed deeply enough and left enough wounds to make you think you weren't worthy of another night within this world of the living."
He bowed his head once more. "That should have never occurred, and thus, the reason why I'm apologizing on behalf of the Forbidden Pack."