For most of her life, she had been careful. For most of her life, she had held her tongue and hidden her thoughts behind dutiful nods and smiles. Being careful was all she knew, and for so many times, being careful was the only thing that had allowed Safiya to stay alive for another day.
If she were to be careful even with the sheikh, then it was best to say nothing and continue with her old and trusted ways. But because this was the sheikh, and he was the man who had showed her the light in her darkest moment—-
"It would mean the world to me if you truly did mean that, alshaykh..."
Altair nearly raised a brow at this. Would it, really?
"But I'm afraid you might've been misled about me." Although a part of Safiya wished she didn't have to say such words, she also knew she hadn't any choice. This was her beloved sheikh, and because she could never ever lie to him—-
"I know people think I am meek and submissive," Safiya went on to confess.
Altair leaned back against his seat. "Are you saying you're not, hamira?"
"What I am saying, alshaykh," she answered carefully, "is that I've learned from a young age it is easier for everyone around if I appeared to be what was expected of me. That is, in fact, the only reason I agreed to my father's plans. I had to play along as it was my only shot of leaving Farigha. I meant to escape and live a life of my own—-"
This time, the sheikh's brow did arch.
"But after what happened..." Safiya's voice turned pensive. "I knew then the king loved his queen, and if so, it would only be a matter of time before his betrothal to me would be dissolved."
"You have no aspirations to become queen?"
Safiya shook her head.
"Then why didn't you make your escape as planned?"
"Because I know of our laws," Safiya answered quietly. "Once the betrothal was dissolved, the royal family would only have two choices for restitution."
"So there was something you were hoping the king would grant you..."
The way the sheikh was looking at her now told Safiya he expected her to reveal what this something was, and Safiya felt torn.
Help me, Mama.
Safiya knew it was silly to pray to one's dead mother for help. She had always known this, but she still did it anyway. The foolish side of hers could be quite stubborn, and just as it insisted on believing in shooting stars and wishing wells, it also insisted on dead mothers looking after their stupid, stupid daughters...
And right now, her dead mother was saying—-
Yallaqihana, jahri.
The truth, my jewel.
Safiya's fists clenched involuntarily, and she could only be thankful her hands were hidden from the sheikh's view.
Imaginary or not, her dead mother was right. To lie to the sheikh was to dishonor him, and so...
"What I hoped for already happened, alshaykh."
Altair stiffened. Was she saying—-
"I wish to be yours, and I wish for you to be mine."
Chapter Four
Dear Mama,
I did it. I did it! I told the sheikh the truth, and while he says he does not love me just yet, he also says he is already MINE. Isn't he wonderful? He is so very honest, Mama, and I love him even more because of it.
ALTAIR WAS UNSURPRISED upon seeing a stony-looking Yara walk inside his office. Given her short leash on her temper, it was rather impressive that she had managed to hold herself back this long. But after today's post on Fuck Being Politically Correct—-
Yara placed a printout on the sheikh's desk. "Have you read this, alshaykh?"
As expected, the printout was the latest post to have come out on the anonymously-run blog, and Altair leaned back against his chair as his cousin started pacing and raging.
"She's been there for six months! Six months!"
"She's also there for her own good," Altair said mildly. "Although we are betrothed, the princess is also much younger than me, and I want her to enjoy her youth."
"Bullshit!"
"What exactly is the problem here, Yara?"
Yara grabbed the printout from the sheikh's desk and waved it at his face. "This is my problem. The blog post's title says it all. IS THERE TROUBLE IN PARADISE BETWEEN SHEIKH ALTAIR AND THE RAMILIAN KHALEESI?"
"There isn't—-"
"How can you say there isn't," Yara nearly yelled, "when you haven't even visited her a single time? The princess has been there for over half a year, and you have never visited her! Not a single time—-"
"The princess is not a child that requires looking after—-"
"The princess' name is Safiya," Yara growled. "She's your fiancée, for heaven's sake! Why can't you even say her name?"
Because things would get personal, Altair thought, and everything would change after that.
The accusation in Yara's eyes spoke volumes. She believed him guilty of neglecting the princess, and it was true. But if she believed staying away from the princess came easy to him...
Every night he would call her, and every night she would answer at the first ring.
Every night he would wonder if the time would ever come when she'd tell him she wanted out, but every time she answered his call, the princess' voice was just like it always was.
Soft. Clear. Melodic. And most of all, it was a voice that loved without having to express anything in words. And its sound gutted him to the core.
Altair wasn't even sure how it happened. Phone calls were all the contact they had between them. It had gone on for months, yes, but they were just fucking phone calls, and it wasn't as if they had spoken of anything of import.
And yet...
She had still gotten under his skin somehow.
And he hadn't been able to stop thinking about her then.
Yara was torn between anger and confusion at the sheikh's continued silence. "She's a good person, alshaykh—-"
"I know that," Altair heard himself say, but whether this was true or not...he wasn't yet prepared to know.
"Then why are you doing this? You must know it's hurting her—-"
"I'm doing this for her," Altair finally forced himself to say. "She's been sheltered her entire life, Yara. Who's to know if she's truly infatuated with me?"
Yara's anger slowly faded.
"With me out of the picture, it should be easier for her to know and understand if her feelings for me are real."
"And if it's not?"
"Then we'll end up with a political marriage of convenience."
"And if it is?"
"Then..."
The sheikh pulled a drawer open, and Yara's eyes widened when she saw what Altair had retrieved to show her. An engagement ring, even if it had the biggest diamond winking back at her, would still have been trash in her sight.
But this...
This heart-shaped locket was famous among Ramilians as they knew it to be an heirloom of the royal family.
Yara quickly bent her head down to offer a bow of heartfelt apology. "Khalis aietidhar, alshaykh." My sincerest apologies, sheikh. "I should've known better than to question your actions towards the princess."