My head started spinning. Holy shit. This was a lot. Was I really going to rent a room from David?
“You know what?” he said. “We can talk about all that later.” I froze, didn’t move when he stepped closer and cupped my face. I could have shaken him off or taken a step back, but I didn’t do any of it. “Don’t worry, stubborn little pup. I’ll take care of you. It’ll all be okay.”
Tell him you don’t want him to take care of you. Tell him you don’t need him to take care of you. But I didn’t say either of those things.
David dropped his hand. “Do you have any questions for me?”
I shook my head, thought maybe my voice was suddenly broken.
“Okay, then this is what I’d like you to do for me. I’m going to go out and run an errand and pick up some food. Call Jordan. He’s off today. Ask him to come over. He’s your friend, and I think he’d like to know what happened to your apartment. I know your impulse is to deal with everything on your own, but you don’t have to. Your friends want to be a part of your life. Let them. He should know you’re staying here. Not because there’s anything wrong with it or because it affects Jordan and me playing together, but as a courtesy. I could tell him, but I think it’s important for you to take these steps to do it yourself. Then when I come home, the three of us will have dinner together.”
I let him get through the whole spiel without arguing with him, without telling him no. Without reminding him I wasn’t his sub and I could do what I wanted. Then I said, “Why do you keep telling me what to do? I’m not your submissive. You don’t have any power over me.”
“Oh, pup. You’re completely wrong if you think submissives don’t have power. They set the limits. They choose to give power to their Dom. There’s control in that—the utmost control. I’ll be back soon.”
He turned and walked out of the room, clearly expecting me to do as he said. He was right, though. Jordan was my friend, and it would hurt his feelings if I didn’t tell him what’d been going down the past few days. And he deserved to know I was at David’s. If he didn’t like it, I would leave.
I sat down on the bed, on the pristine mint-green comforter. Jesus, this was all so fucked up. I felt disoriented, out of place, but weirdly wanting to fit. I wondered if Finley had felt this way when he moved in with Aidan—as if he was in a new world.
“Get it together, Ian,” I muttered, pulling my phone out of my pocket.
“Hey, you,” Jordan answered.
“Hey. How’s it going?”
“Pretty good. Are you okay? You sound funny.”
I took a deep breath and went for it. “Actually, I have a…situation. I’m at David’s, and I wondered if you could come over and talk to me for a bit?”
“Oh, wow. I didn’t expect that.” He was silent for a moment, and I hoped he wasn’t upset. “You’re okay?” he asked.
“Yeah, yeah I am.”
“Good. I’ll be right there.”
He didn’t sound upset. He also didn’t ask me why I was at the house of the guy he’d told me he wanted to fuck. Jordan was a good guy. Sometimes he came off like he didn’t care about much, or that he was all about the sex or what he could get, but that wasn’t true. He was…hell, he was special. I was lucky to have him in my life.
CHAPTER EIGHT
Jordan
I had to admit, I was confused as hell about why Ian was at David’s.
When I arrived, David’s car wasn’t in the driveway, but Ian’s was. I got out with a wave to the driver, and saw Ian sitting on the porch, his leg bouncing up and down. My heart swooped in discomfort. Something was definitely wrong, and the thought sent nerves racing through me.
“What happened? What’s going on? Fuck, something isn’t wrong with Finley, is it?”
“What? No, no. Sorry. I didn’t even consider your thoughts would go there. It’s just…this is awkward. I’m all stressed out.”
I sat beside him on the brick step. “I’ve never seen you like this.”
“I don’t think I’ve been a very good friend to you, Jordan.”
If I hadn’t already been sitting, that comment would have knocked me off my feet. Ian didn’t say things like that. “You’re a good friend. You don’t really let people in, or…you seem to only do that with Finley, so I don’t take offense.”
Ian looked down, his hair flopping into his face. “I’m gonna try and get better. I’ll probably fuck up because that’s not my natural way, ya know? But yeah, I’ll try.”
“You’re fine, Ian. I sort of like you the way you are.” I said that last part playfully, hooking my arm through his and resting my head on his shoulder.
“You’re affectionate like Fin.”
“We’re attention and praise sluts. Cuddle us and tell us we’re pretty or doing a good job, and we’ll do anything.” I nuzzled closer to him. “I’m waiting,” I added when he didn’t reply.
Ian chuckled. “You’re gorgeous and you know it. And I’m sure you’re…a good boy or whatever David would say.”
“Whoa. Your voice dropped when you said that. It was hot. Are you sure you don’t have a little Dom in you sometimes?” I teased.
“Who knows, but I’m suddenly letting David boss me around.”
My pulse kicked up in excitement. “Wait. What? Spill.”
He shook his head. “Nothing. I don’t know why I said that.”
He did, actually. I could tell he was holding back. I didn’t mention it, not wanting to remind him he just said he was going to try. “Tell me I’m pretty again, and then tell me what’s going on. It’s okay if you’re fucking him—or going to be fucking him. We’re playing, not exclusive. You seemed like you might have been a little upset with me the other day.” That thought sat strangely in my stomach. Holy fuck. What if Ian wanted David? Like really wanted him and not just to play with him? I didn’t see how that could work since Ian wasn’t submissive, but I had to admit, I did see something in the way they talked sometimes, in the way they looked at each other. Like they were kindred spirits in some ways. A twinge of jealousy started in my gut.
“I’m not fucking him, and I’m not going to be fucking him.”
“You forgot to tell me I’m pretty.” I looked up at him and batted my eyelashes.
“You’re sexy as hell is what you are.” Ian nudged me gently with his arm, and I grinned. I liked that, liked hearing Ian tell me I was sexy. “And I’m not sure why I was tripping out about you wanting David.”
“Might be because you guys get each other in a way I don’t, like you both share a secret, so maybe you like him and didn’t realize it.” Loneliness suddenly draped over me, and I trembled.
“I don’t think he gets me. I feel…odd with him sometimes. Not creepy odd, just a feeling I can’t explain, but I think I feel that way toward you too, so I’m guessing it’s because you guys are both my friends, ya know? So it would be like I’d be left out. It would be Aidan and Finley, and you and David, and then…me. But I don’t fit, so it makes sense. I don’t want the sex stuff you guys do.”