“Why the rush?” asked my brother JJ. “You knocked up or something?”
“John Patrick DeRossi, what is the matter with you?” My mother was outraged.
“I’m not pregnant,” I assured everyone at the table.
“But you want children, right?” Mrs. Moretti nodded at me, as if to encourage an affirmative answer.
“Yes. We do.”
Both our mothers looked so elated I thought they might rocket right out of their chairs.
“I think I’m going to cry. It’s like all my prayers are being answered in the space of ten minutes.” Mrs. Moretti fanned her face and turned her eyes to the ceiling. “Thank you,” she whispered.
“Anyway, Ma, we really don’t want a priest. I’m already in touch with Judge Reinhart—we did a kitchen reno for him and his wife last year—and I’m just waiting for him to get back to me with a date.”
“James Reinhart?” Mr. Moretti nodded. “I’ll call him tomorrow. We gave him a great deal on that home renovation, and he said if I ever needed anything to give him a call.”
Enzo spoke up. “Pop, we’ve got this. You don’t need to—”
“Consider it done,” Mr. Moretti spoke with finality. “I’ll get that wedding date for you by the end of the week.”
Enzo and I looked at each other—a completely unrehearsed look of oh shit, this just got real.
I recovered first, flashing Enzo’s father a grin. “Thanks, Mr. Moretti. We’d appreciate that.”
“So Enzo, how did you propose?” asked his sister Eve.
We were prepared for this question, and I had the first line.
“It was very romantic,” I said, trying not to laugh as I recalled his drunk ass showing me the ring engraved for someone else. “He even got down on one knee.”
“Where were you?” asked Cat.
“At my condo,” I answered.
“Were you surprised?” Lynne asked.
“She was shocked.” Enzo sounded pleased with himself as he put his arm around me again. “Shocked and delighted. She couldn’t say yes fast enough. And she cried tears of joy.”
That was not in the script.
Before I could help myself, I gave him an annoyed look, which he responded to by stepping on my foot. I quickly tried to shift my face into an expression of adoration. “It was quite the surprise,” I said through my teeth.
“I’m sure it was,” Talia said, amused. “Whoever thought Enzo would be the type to get down on one knee?”
“Both knees, actually,” I said, adding my own bit of improvised dialogue. “Almost like he was begging me to spend the rest of our lives together. He just kept saying over and over again how much he loved me. How he can’t wait for me to be his wife.”
Enzo dug his fingertips into my shoulder. “You’re just so lovable, mia polpetta,” he said, his jaw tight, staring murderously into my eyes. “Once I got past your prickly surface, I discovered a truly big heart.”
“And once I realized there was more to you than your big fat ego, I couldn’t help falling in love.” I bit back a laugh. “In fact, I find your insufferable arrogance sort of charming now.”
“And I find your know-it-all attitude and general air of imperious self-importance downright entrancing,” he said angrily. He was gripping my shoulder hard enough to leave a bruise. “I am so bewitched by you, sweetheart, I can hardly see straight.”
To my left, Ellie cleared her throat. “Wow. Clearly you were meant to be.”
“Clearly,” I said, and then I couldn’t resist planting a kiss smack on Enzo’s lips. His mouth was warm and firm and felt nice against mine, so nice I dragged out the kiss for a few seconds longer than planned. A warmth blossomed deep in my belly and spread through my limbs. When I pulled away, Enzo’s expression told me how stunned he was. Frankly, I was kind of stunned too—my body had reacted as if the kiss was real.
It wasn’t, though. Was it? I was just playing a role.
So why were my toes still tingling?
“Aww, now isn’t that sweet?” My mother sighed and picked up her wine glass. “You two are going to be together forever. I just know it.”
While we were waiting for dessert and coffee to be served, my sister grabbed my arm. “Ladies’ room, please,” she murmured.
I turned to Enzo. “I’ll be right back, honey,” I said, patting his arm as if he might miss me.
He nodded and picked up his wine glass. He’d been a little quiet throughout the meal, but I figured it was just the stress of putting our “relationship” to the test for the first time on such a big stage.
I followed Ellie to the bathroom, and the minute we were alone behind the closed door, she whirled on me and clutched her head. “Oh my God! I can’t believe you guys are going through with this. Look at me. I’m sweating.” She pulled the armpits of her blouse away from her body.
I laughed. “Relax. It’s going great. Mom and Dad are so happy, they’re not even questioning the fact that we’re obviously rushing into something that will be a big fat mistake.” We entered the side-by-side stalls and continued talking.
“Neither are the Morettis,” Ellie commented. “Except maybe Pietro.”
“Well, he’s about to lose the opportunity to be head of the family firm. Understandable why he might be reluctant to offer his heartiest congrats.”
“Mr. Moretti seems a bit quiet too. Think he’s got doubts?”
I’d noticed his silence—which had mirrored Enzo’s—and his curious eyes on us all night. “Hard to say for sure, but he certainly volunteered to reach out to the judge quickly enough.”
“Maybe he expected you guys to argue against it.”
“Hopefully, he noticed that we didn’t.” We came out of the stalls and washed our hands beside one another at the sinks. “We don’t see any reason to push it back.”
She rinsed her hands, shaking her head. “I still can’t believe you guys are going through with it. At least you’re marrying someone hot. Sometimes it’s hard to look away from his face. And I’m not even attracted to men.”
I laughed, reaching for the stack of towels on the counter. “He’s handsome. I agree.”
“Do you guys get along at all?”
“Nope.” Grinning, I dug into my purse for my lipstick. “I mean, we’re learning better how to fake it, and occasionally I get this glimmer of appreciation or maybe even gratitude for him, but then he says something truly loathsome and I remember why he’s the worst.”
She laughed, fussing with her hair in the mirror. “I don’t know, you have pretty good chemistry. Sparks were definitely flying between you at the table.”
“For all the wrong reasons,” I said pointedly. “Our chemistry is not the good kind.”
She shrugged. “Sparks are sparks. And it would not surprise me at all if eventually something catches fire.”
I rolled my eyes and reapplied lipstick. “Not happening.”
Facing me, her expression was wry. “You’re telling me you’re not attracted to him whatsoever?”