“Calm down. Nothing bad happened,” Adele raises her hands in an effort to keep the peace. “Right, Sadie?”
“I was fine. He was a perfect gentleman.” I blush, remembering that ride. My body pressed against Deke’s giant body, the bike rumbling between my legs. “I know it’s not something I’d normally do, but I felt totally safe with him,” I add softly.
My friends are quiet, processing this.
“So what happened tonight?” Tabitha asks.
I shrug. “I invited him to meet me. I made him cookies as a thank you. And...”
“And?” Adele and the other two lean in closer.
“And...he took me to the alleyway and kissed me.”
Another explosion.
“I knew it.” Tabitha punches the pillow she’s holding.
“Nice.” Charlie sags back into her bean bag chair. “Was it good?”
“Look at her blush. Of course, it was good,” Tabitha says.
Adele grabs her wine glass and takes a long swallow, watching me over the rim.
“Did you use protection?” Tabitha jokes, wagging a finger at me.
My cheeks are an inferno. “It didn’t get that far.”
“But it would have?” Charlie’s eyes grow wide.
“It was a really, really good kiss.” I fold my hands in my lap, doing my best prim teacher impression. “That’s all I’m going to say.”
“You okay?” Adele asks. Her green eyes probe me.
“I’m good. After the kiss, he had to go.”
“I’ll bet twenty bucks Scott finds out and shows up again at Sadie’s school with flowers,” Charlie announces to the room.
“That is so rude. We shouldn’t be betting on Sadie’s love life,” Tabitha shakes her head at Charlie. “But I’ll take that bet.”
Charlie just grins.
“What I want to know is if you’re seeing him again,” Adele says.
My giddy feelings drop away. “I don’t know. He left pretty abruptly. One of his biker buddies rode up and said he had to go. It was kind of weird.”
“That was the clam-jam?” Tabitha asks.
I nod.
“Sadie, maybe it’s for the best.” Adele doesn’t make eye contact with me. She’s focused on her wine glass, moving it gently so the garnet liquid swirls.
“What do you mean by that?” Tabitha asks.
Adele bites her lip then says, “I did some digging. These guys are military. Like, special ops. Top secret missions and all that. Probably American assassins.”
“What branch of the military?” Charlie asks.
“Army. Special forces. They were honorably discharged last year.”
I cock my head to the side. “How do you know all this?”
Adele raises one slim shoulder in a half shrug. She still doesn’t look at me.
“Adele works in mysterious ways,” Tabitha says into the awkward silence.
“Well, now they’re like a motorcycle gang or something,” Charlie offers. “They bought an old ski valley resort and use it as their home base.”
“They’re called clubs not gangs,” Adele corrects.
“So they’re in a club.” Tabitha stretches out her long legs, slouching further into my couch. “So what? That’s not a crime.”
“There’s more than that,” Adele sighs. “Deke has a record. Assault and battery. He lost it in a bar and beat a guy up. Put him in the hospital. The cops investigated, but the guy didn’t end up pressing charges.”
There’s a silence while we all absorb this.
“I see,” I say. “Is that why you staged this little intervention?”
“She called us up and told us you’d been spotted with the biker dude. We couldn’t stay away,” Tabitha said.
“We care about you, Sadie,” Charlie says.
I can’t sit any longer. “Deke’s not like that.” I cross to the kitchen and grab my cardigan, tugging it on and rubbing my arms like I’m cold. “He wouldn’t hurt me.” I think it through. “If that happened, he was probably protecting a woman. He’s that kind of guy.”
My friends watch me from the living room. They don’t say anything, but I can hear the unspoken question. How do you know?
How do I know? It’s just a feeling. But then I’m not that great a judge of people. I was with Scott, after all.
“I’m not saying he’s not a bad person.” I realize I’m pacing and halt. “I don't know him that well, but I feel safe with him.” I run a hand through my hair. It’s still tangled. I can still feel his big hands on me, his breath on my face. I relive the kiss and arousal shoots from the pit of my belly and blossoms between my legs.
“I didn’t say that,” Adele hesitates, her normal poise broken as she chooses her words. She looks really worried. “I just think you should be careful. We don’t want you to get hurt.”
This is ridiculous. First, Deke’s biker friend and now my friends. Are my instincts about him wrong?
I’m sorry. He told me. I should’ve stayed away. Is he really so dangerous?
“Well, don’t worry about me,” I say with a fake laugh. “I doubt I’ll ever see Deke again.”
“I’m sorry,” Tabitha says, sounding subdued. “It sounds like that might be for the best.”
Deke
After the fight, Channing’s wolf pants on the side of the road, blood slicking his fur, staining the white patches red. With a silent snarl, he slinks into the brush, heading off to lick his wounds and shift.
The rage inside me still burns. My wolf walks stiff legged back to my bike. Scraps of white fabric litter the ground. My t-shirt. The one Sadie dug her hands into when I kissed her. The fabric still bears her scent.
I point my nose to the moon and howl.
After I shift, I ride for an extra hour, up and down Taos Mountain until my hands are stiff on the handlebars. Then I turn and head down the dark road home.
The pack bought a mountain lodge sometime back. We always knew we’d need to retire someplace remote where we can run free as wolves. Last year, Rafe decided it was time to get out of the service. It wasn’t that our missions were getting harder and more dangerous—although they were. We were a unit, a secret regiment of shifters united under a colonel who knew what we were. When we were on a mission, we thrived. We flew in under the cover of night, our super senses making it easy for us to see when humans couldn’t. We did the blackest of black ops, and we loved every moment. We loved it too much.
Rafe could tell we were losing our humanity. Especially me. He decided our wolves required more space and freedom for the safety of everyone around us. The Colonel agreed and had reasons to want us as private contractors, instead. He arranged an honorable discharge with healthy retirement packages then hired us for the same type of missions we were doing before, only now the government could claim no knowledge of us if things went wrong. A privilege they are willing to pay handsomely for.
But for me and my wolf, it was too late. My wolf loves the thrill of the kill and always would. Even now, a year into retirement, my wolf is savage. Broken. Rafe tried to save me, I’m already too far gone.