“I’m okay. Thank you, though.”
Ace shrugged in a suit yourself manner before plopping down at the table where Emma, Ivy, and another stewardess whose name I couldn’t recall were already seated. Joel cracked his beer open and was already in a conversation with Eric while everyone at the table got back to what they were talking about before we walked in. I stood right by the stairway, grabbing my elbow with the opposite hand and wishing I had my camera to hold onto.
Emma patted the bench next to her, scooting over a little and offering me a kind smile. “How was your first day onboard?” she asked once I was seated.
I shrugged. “To be honest, I think I’m still in shock that I’m here.”
“That’s fair,” Emma said with a chuckle. “I’m sure you’ll settle in soon enough.”
“I just feel odd, meandering around while everyone is working so hard.”
“Well, if you ever need something to do, come see me and I guarantee I can keep you busy for a few hours,” Ivy said, tossing her long blonde hair over her shoulder with a wink to the girl sitting next to her. She really was strikingly beautiful, with emerald green eyes and lips painted a deep blush. She had a beauty mark just above her top lip like Marilyn Monroe, and the way she smiled was confident and sexy.
“And then what would you do?” Emma challenged with an arched brow. “I already have a hard enough time wrangling you and Celeste as it is.”
“Hey! It’s not my fault,” the girl next to Ivy defended, elbowing Ivy playfully. She had beautiful brown skin and jet black hair, with eyes just as dark. Her English was perfect, but lilted with a Spanish accent. “She’s the bad influence.”
“I work harder than any other stewardess you’ve had and you know it,” Ivy said to Emma. “That’s why you wanted me for this job.”
“Oh, yeah,” Ace said with a roll of his eyes. “I’m sure it had nothing to do with the fact that your uncle works with Theo.”
“Shut up,” Ivy said, tossing a pretzel at him with her eyes narrowed. “I earned this spot just as well as the rest of you.”
“You know I’m kidding, baby,” he said, pulling her into his chest and kissing her hair.
I smiled. “How long have you two been dating?”
At that, the whole table fell silent, and then a chorus of laughter rang out. “Oh, no, we’re not together,” Ivy explained. “Sorry, I guess it must seem odd for an outsider. We’re all a little flirtatious around here.” She smiled at Ace, then at Celeste, and then — very purposefully — at Joel. She shrugged when she faced me again. “Sometimes we make out or hook up, but it’s never anything serious.”
I balked at her forwardness, glancing at Joel, but he was already locked back in conversation with his new boss.
Emma squeezed my leg under the table and leaned in to whisper for only me to hear. “I’ve worked with Joel three summers now, babe. Trust me — he only has eyes for you.”
I smiled on a nod, and really, I had no reason to believe otherwise. I was more surprised at the nonchalant way Ivy had spoken about the crew hooking up. Then again, I supposed if you were stuck on a boat with the same people for a long time, it made sense that attraction would grow.
The night went on, and Joel bounced around the room the same way he did when we used to go to college parties at CU. I stayed in the same spot at the table, listening to conversations, laughing at jokes, watching with amusement as the crew danced and ragged on each other. It seemed like most of them had worked together at least once before, save for Eric, the two chefs, and one of the deck hands, Mario. Still, they seemed to fit right in.
I found myself drifting into my own little world, as I often did at parties. It was all so overwhelming for me, and I slipped into my usual state of numbing out, thinking of sleep, wondering what the rest of the trip would be like. I was lost in that daze when Ivy’s gold-manicured nails tapped the wood in front of where I sat.
“Do you ever wear makeup, Aspen?”
Celeste nudged her while Emma whispered a hushed Ivy under her breath.
“What?” she asked innocently, shrugging. “I just haven’t seen her wear any since she’s been here.” She shook her head, making a clicking sound with her tongue against her cheek before her hand grabbed mine. Her fingers were slim and cool. “I ask only because I’m into cosmetics. And your eyes,” she said, shaking her head as she stared at me. “They’re so unique. I’d love to give you a makeover one day, if you’d be up for it.”
“Oh, yes! That would be so fun!” Celeste agreed.
They looked at me expectantly, and my eyes flicked to Joel, to Emma, to anyone who might save me, but everyone just stared and waited.
“Uh… sure,” I managed with a smile. “My sister used to do my makeup and hair back home. I kind of miss it.”
Ivy squealed and clapped her hands together. “Perfect! It’ll be a fun project.”
“You always did love a challenge, Ivy,” Celeste murmured, and that made Ivy smile and elbow her friend before she stood from the table and announced it was time to do shots.
Everyone roared in approval, gathering around the small countertop where the alcohol bottles were lined as I shrank into myself overanalyzing that last comment. Emma stood, too, but stopped long enough to squeeze my shoulder. “You doing okay?”
I took a deep breath, nodding with what little smile I could manage. “Yeah. I think I just need some air. Can you tell Joel I’m going up on the main deck for a bit but I’ll be back?”
“Sure thing. And hey,” she said, offering me a kind smile. “I know it’s all overwhelming right now, but don’t worry. Everyone here is harmless — albeit a little crazy, too.” She chuckled. “We get rowdy sometimes. We laugh and joke and pick on each other. We’re like a big, misfit family. And you’re a part of that family now.”
I smiled in return, though I didn’t feel like part of the family. I thanked her all the same, waiting until all the focus was on the shots being poured before I excused myself. I took the stairs two at a time up to the main deck, and as soon as I passed through the salon and out onto the open deck, I heaved a sigh of relief.
The salty air was cool but pleasant against my hot skin. The only sound up here was the waves, and I smiled at the peacefulness of it, making my way leisurely to the bow of the boat. Resting my arms on the railing, I let my head fall back, closing my eyes and inhaling a deep breath.
Something squeezed in my chest once I was alone, a foreign but noticeable pinch that I couldn’t decipher. I’d been feeling it build ever since Joel and I left the States, like my body was trying to tell me something.
It was such a strange time in my life — an in-between state of being that left me wondering where I belonged, or if I belonged anywhere at all. I was no longer a student, defined by the university I attended or the major I declared. Yet, I wasn’t an adult, either. I didn’t have a job or a home of my own or a plan for what would happen next.
Like a leaf on the water, I felt adrift, floating without purpose.
A heavy exhale left my chest as I blinked my eyes open, and when I did, I found a sky full of stars above. My breath caught at the sight. Sure, there were beautiful night skies in Colorado, especially if you hiked out into the Rockies and got away from the capital. But these stars were bright and twinkling, the Spanish shores quiet and dim in comparison.