Home > Pushing You Away (Noah & Katie duet #1)(3)

Pushing You Away (Noah & Katie duet #1)(3)
Author: Kennedy Fox

Loretta and Elliot Reid have been very involved in Owen’s life since Gabe was their only son. I’m grateful for them because after Gabe died, trying to raise a newborn alone left me exhausted. My mother helps a lot too, which I appreciate. When Owen was a baby, he didn’t sleep much, which meant neither did I. I was struggling to be a new mom and a widow. I would’ve been lost without the support of everyone who stepped up to offer a hand.

“I can’t…” Gemma hesitates, and I can tell something’s off.

“Oh, why not?”

“Well, I won’t be able to drink for about…nine months.”

My heart leaps in my throat. “Oh my God. You’re pregnant?”

I immediately wrap my arms around her. Gemma and Tyler Blackwood got married over a year ago after her ex-fiancé blackmailed her. He was an awful, conniving man and used threats so she’d agree to marry him. Once all the lies came to light, Tyler devised a plan to get her out of it. Long story short, they’ve been happily married ever since, and I’m over the moon excited they’re adding to their family. They were in love when Gemma was in high school, and it took twelve years for them to find each other again.

“I’m really happy for you guys,” I say. “How far along are you?”

“Only ten weeks but I didn’t want to wait too long to tell you. Once we got the ultrasound and confirmed everything was healthy, I was just waiting for the right way to announce it.”

“That’s exciting! I bet Tyler’s ecstatic.”

“He is. I’m so lucky.” She beams. “And I’m thrilled Noah will be getting out next month and can be a part of my pregnancy journey. He’s already missed so much over the past ten years. I’m just happy he’ll be around for this.”

I swallow down the lump that forms in my throat at the mention of her brother. She always treads lightly when it comes to Noah, but I can tell she’s eager about his homecoming. I, on the other hand, am dreading it.

“Shit, sorry,” she quickly says once she sees my expression.

“No, no, it’s fine. Better get used to it, right?” I half-laugh.

Soon, he’ll be back and impossible to avoid. Though Gemma and Everleigh are my best girl friends, Noah and I were inseparable for as long as I can remember. Not only was he funny and always down for an adventure but his smile would light up an entire room and cause butterflies every time he looked at me.

When I was younger, I didn’t understand what it meant, but I realized I had feelings for him as I got older. Gemma and Everleigh were the only two who knew and kept telling me to ask him out. I was too nervous he’d reject me—or worse, laugh—so I held onto the hope he’d admit he felt the same. When he never did, I assumed he only saw me as a friend. Anytime the opportunity arose, he never made a move, so when his cousin moved to town and asked me out, I accepted. Noah never said a word about it and seemed to approve, so I dated Gabe during my last two years of high school. When Gabe proposed the year after I graduated, I said yes because I thought I loved him. Not the way I had secretly loved Noah, but that was different and unexplainable. It was a love so deep it felt unnatural.

However, those feelings shifted after he was sentenced to prison, and he wouldn’t let me visit him. He couldn’t even return a damn letter. Years have passed, and I still don’t know why he pushed me away. Gemma pleaded with him to respond or let me see him, but he’d give her the runaround. After years of him ignoring me, my hurt turned to anger. If I were to see him today, I don’t know what I’d do. Maybe I’d just ignore him for the next decade like he ignored me.

The man I once loved has let me down. Not only did I lose a husband but I also lost my best friend at the same time.

I didn’t even get a say in the matter.

“I hope you two can talk it out,” Gemma says as I walk around, needing to keep myself busy. “He’s going to need as many people on his side as possible. This town hasn’t forgotten what happened, and I’m worried for him.”

“Well, I’ve been trying to talk to him for years, Gemma,” I remind her.

“I know, Katie. Trust me, I wish I could’ve talked some sense into him, but he’s a stubborn asshole sometimes. Perhaps this will be a new beginning for both of you.”

“Not counting on it,” I say dryly, wanting to change the subject.

“Katie…”

“I don’t want to see him,” I admit. “I know I will eventually have to, but I refuse to go out of my way. I’ve done enough of that.”

“I understand, but please just remember Tyler and I had our second chance after he got out of prison. I really believe that can happen for you two.”

I snort, nearly choking. “I wouldn’t be placing bets on that, babe.”

He knew what I was going through, yet he couldn’t even spare five minutes to write back. I never blamed him for Gabe’s death, never got angry with him for getting in our business, and never wanted him to go to prison for what happened. I knew Gabe was cheating, and the fact his mistress was there that night made the whole situation worse. But to be ghosted by my best friend when I just wanted to support him and make sure he was okay? I was devastated. In fact, if he shows up on my front porch, I won’t think twice about shoving him right on his ass.

“Never say never.” She smirks.

“I’m too hurt to give him a chance,” I admit. “I have too much pent-up anger toward him, and the more I think about it, the madder I get.”

“Okay, sorry. I won’t bring it up again.”

“I know he’s your brother, so it’s gonna come up, but now you know how I feel about it all.”

“So I better warn him to wear a bulletproof vest if he’s around you.” She’s laughing, but I glare at her. “Okay, sorry, I’m done now.”

I finish walking Gemma through the house, explaining what I want to do and what colors I want to paint the walls. Owen’s an only child, so he’ll have his own space upstairs. We barely fit in the place we’re renting right now, so I can’t wait to give him the home he deserves.

“Just so you know…um, you-know-who will be working with Tyler at the gym. But I hope you’ll come and see it once things are ready for the grand opening.”

I shake my head at how she tries to avoid using his name. “It’s fine, Gemma. Just let me know when he’s not there, and I’ll come visit. I’m sure Owen would love to see it too.” I give her a hug when we reach the front door. “We’re very proud of you guys.”

“Thank you, I am too. I can’t believe it’s really happening. With my dad retiring, it feels like the perfect timing.”

“Once this house is finally done, I’ll actually have time to work out again. Looking forward to that even though I’ll probably just hang out at the juice bar.”

We laugh, and I tell her to give me every update she gets on the baby. I still can’t believe she’s pregnant. I wish our kids were closer in age, but that’s what happens when one of us gets pregnant before we can even legally drink.

 

 

Since I’m kid-free for the night and there’s literally nothing to do in Lawton Ridge, Alabama, in January, I finish up at the house, then head home for some solo drinking and Netflix bingeing.

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